So..
I'm enjoying myself. School's... ok. Always could be better. (from my end of course). This season hits me in the worst places. Mostly my heart.
Sara came home for "Fall Break"... whatever the fuck that is. ha.
I made friends with this kid Nick back in September, and he recently started dating someone. I picked up that someone (Ethan) from the train station and we all pretty much spent the weekend together. Ethan's pretty awesome. He's like... the Hollister version of Trevor <333333.
(oh, p.s. Ethan is the Spring of '09 face for Hollister. keep your eyes out for him.)
I miss Ronny.
Blah, I can't keep my priorities straight. Bottom line.
I should be focusing more on school. But it's tough.
I should be focusing on my "performance skills". But it's tough.
I just straight up can't focus.
I was in a variety show last night. Nikki and I sang Suddenly Seymour. The whopping 38 person crowd cheered pretty hard. But then I had a solo at the end. The last act in the ENTIRE thing. I said a little something along the lines of (but really MEANT to say),
"I want to thank everyone for coming out tonight. It's incredible seeing people here because I know how much this means to Debbie. The song I'll be singing is about finding that special someone or having someone so important to you in your life... and just knowing that you're the luckiest. Debbie has had a traumatizing experience with the loss of her son Michael. I said to myself, I could never imagine what it'd be like to lose someone who I cared about so much. Unfortunately for me, I have experienced such sorrow 6 months ago. What Debbie is doing here is remarkable. One of the biggest fears with loss, is forgetting. But by continuing this event, year after year, it's impossible to forget someone who has impacted so many lives. This song goes out to Debbie. Michael will live forever in our hearts and through our songs. Debbie, I love you.. and thank you for everything that you've done."
I was so... emotional on the inside, that I couldn't even think of what I was doing. I forgot how to sing... I was just a wreck. After my song, we said our goodbyes... people said I made them cry. Mothers/Fathers and teens alike. But I didn't want them to sympathize. Empathy is much more powerful and comes from a much deeper part of the soul. But I don't know how well my message translated to the audience. I was in such a funk after the show... But I cheered up.
Nick and Ethan came over. spent the night. watched Donnie Darko. they're cute. minus Nick being 6'7". ha!
Ok, time to bring Ethan back to the station. I'm sure he'll be back in like... 2 weeks. Then he's transferring. So I won't have to drive to that mess of a place again. Thank Gibreel.
Sara came home for "Fall Break"... whatever the fuck that is. ha.
I made friends with this kid Nick back in September, and he recently started dating someone. I picked up that someone (Ethan) from the train station and we all pretty much spent the weekend together. Ethan's pretty awesome. He's like... the Hollister version of Trevor <333333.
(oh, p.s. Ethan is the Spring of '09 face for Hollister. keep your eyes out for him.)
I miss Ronny.
Blah, I can't keep my priorities straight. Bottom line.
I should be focusing more on school. But it's tough.
I should be focusing on my "performance skills". But it's tough.
I just straight up can't focus.
I was in a variety show last night. Nikki and I sang Suddenly Seymour. The whopping 38 person crowd cheered pretty hard. But then I had a solo at the end. The last act in the ENTIRE thing. I said a little something along the lines of (but really MEANT to say),
"I want to thank everyone for coming out tonight. It's incredible seeing people here because I know how much this means to Debbie. The song I'll be singing is about finding that special someone or having someone so important to you in your life... and just knowing that you're the luckiest. Debbie has had a traumatizing experience with the loss of her son Michael. I said to myself, I could never imagine what it'd be like to lose someone who I cared about so much. Unfortunately for me, I have experienced such sorrow 6 months ago. What Debbie is doing here is remarkable. One of the biggest fears with loss, is forgetting. But by continuing this event, year after year, it's impossible to forget someone who has impacted so many lives. This song goes out to Debbie. Michael will live forever in our hearts and through our songs. Debbie, I love you.. and thank you for everything that you've done."
I was so... emotional on the inside, that I couldn't even think of what I was doing. I forgot how to sing... I was just a wreck. After my song, we said our goodbyes... people said I made them cry. Mothers/Fathers and teens alike. But I didn't want them to sympathize. Empathy is much more powerful and comes from a much deeper part of the soul. But I don't know how well my message translated to the audience. I was in such a funk after the show... But I cheered up.
Nick and Ethan came over. spent the night. watched Donnie Darko. they're cute. minus Nick being 6'7". ha!
Ok, time to bring Ethan back to the station. I'm sure he'll be back in like... 2 weeks. Then he's transferring. So I won't have to drive to that mess of a place again. Thank Gibreel.