The Fish - again
This weekly card is probably be a bit short and fast, cause I don't feel very well today...
Last week I got the Peacock and intuitively I understood that it was about me having a hard time to digest situations, the interpretation of the card when it's out of balance.
I've got to say that last week is as a blur to me right now. I think it went by kind of fast, with a multitude of feelings and emotions. But from what I can gather, I feel like I went through the whole range of interpretations possible.
I began the week in balance, after some chakra meditation, floral essence for grounding and carrying a crystal with me to work to protect me against all the negativity around there. I can really say I felt confident and kind to everyone there and I felt like nothing could get to me - I came back home surprised with how well my first day back went.
But that didn't last and I ended up the week at the unbalanced side of the card. New things happened at work, now, all of the sudden, our regional manager decided that it's healthy for us managers to compete among ourselves (a healthy internal competition, she called) and that definitely did not sit well with me. If there's one thing that made me love the place I work was the complete lack of competition and the fact that I've always felt like we worked as a team, instead of trying to be better than the someone else... And now this.
Really, how can people think that competition is healthy? If you want to compete, compete with yourself, try to get better today than what you were yesterday, but trying to beat someone else and be better than, that's not healthy, at least not from where I stand. It encourages comparison, frustration and a huge sense of individuality in a place that should have people working as a unity. But oh well, what do I know?
The card for this week is not a new one, it's something that I had drawn before. Actually, 1 month ago. I had a busy day yesterday and when I got home I just felt like doing nothing and watching tv, so this morning was the time I decided to see what animal would rule my week.
the fish - animal spirit deck
Again, my friend, the Fish. Today though, what caught my attention was more about the summarizing words than the description itself. Restlessness, change of focus, lost in the current.
For this card today, I'd allow myself to only deep analyse it next week, after it all passed. As I said in the beginning of the post, I don't feel my best today. I feel disconnected. I had a really hard time focusing and centering myself to draw the card and for a few moments I even wondered if it was best for me to just wait and draw it at another time...
So maybe this can be the meaning of the card for today? How restless I am right now or how out of focus I was when I draw it? Maybe I should've waited for a moment when I felt more connected to myself and to what I wanted to know?
Or maybe I'll surprise myself once again and my dear Fish will show me its balanced side during the week, allowing me to adapt well to what's going on? Or will it be its unbalanced side, with distraction, changing my mind often?
Right now, I would say the latter. I do feel lost in the current. Disconnected and with an airy mind (if that's even a thing). Maybe I should start my week following its advice and taking everything slowly, step by step, one small goal after another and see where it takes me.