(no subject)
In lieu of a valentine's gift to not_a_eunuch from Darla, I offer a tabloid ; the result of his current stay in New York to help out Connor*g*
From The Daily Bugle
MUTANT INVASION !
New supervillain sighted
Fang Man: Menace Unbound
New York City, February 14th 2006. Not even two weeks after the demise of the Green Goblin, New Yorkers are threatened anew. Not by Spider-man and Kid Vicious, who haven't been sighted for a while, this paper is happy to report, doubtlessly hoping their failed con job will be forgotten if they go underground. No, the rampaging marauder who terrorizes our beleagured city these days is a new threat.
Charlene Tyrol, 32, "singer" with the New Ziegfeld Follies, was returning from work last night with a friend when asked for the way by two lost tourists. "Sure, I might have squealed a little," she says, "but that was just because one of them looked like George Clooney. And next thing you know, this guy in black leather shows up. First I'm thinking, PR stunt for Syriana, and boy, do I want to get my picture in the papers with George Clooney, so I'm taking out my cell phone which has a camera and tell Sue-Lynn to press the button, and then I fling myself between them. Then this freak turns around and - well, you've got it digitally. Did you see those teeth and the nose? Is that the result of the bird flu or something? Because I'm moving to Canada if it is."
*Picture of Angel in game face*
Investigating Charlene's claim, The Daily Bugle found others willing to step forward and talk about New York's newest superpowered plague. "Him? Black leather, build like a trunk, serious anger issues? Sure, I've seen him," Fred Ivins, 54, confirmed. Ivins, a butcher from Queens, observed the creature stealing blood. "So I say, buddy, you're gonna pay more for that if you want me to keep quiet, and he does this phantom of the opera impression. Is that the result of those human/animal hybrid things the President said he's against in his state of the union speech? I'm so with him there. Voting Republican from now on, you betcha. Those things shouldn't be allowed to exist!"
As to what Fang Man might be up to, other than spreading terror among tourists, butchers and New Yorkers alike: we're not sure. Approached by us, representatives of OsCorp and Campbell Industries, the two firms most closely tied to past vigilantes, declined to comment. This uncharacteristic silence, especially by publicity eager Todd Campbell, leads us to suspect Fang Man might be threaten either or both companies to pay for his services or suffer the fate the Daily Bugle had faced during the Goblin's recent rampage. Our advice: don't give in to terrorists! Never give up, never surrender!
From The Daily Bugle
MUTANT INVASION !
New supervillain sighted
Fang Man: Menace Unbound
New York City, February 14th 2006. Not even two weeks after the demise of the Green Goblin, New Yorkers are threatened anew. Not by Spider-man and Kid Vicious, who haven't been sighted for a while, this paper is happy to report, doubtlessly hoping their failed con job will be forgotten if they go underground. No, the rampaging marauder who terrorizes our beleagured city these days is a new threat.
Charlene Tyrol, 32, "singer" with the New Ziegfeld Follies, was returning from work last night with a friend when asked for the way by two lost tourists. "Sure, I might have squealed a little," she says, "but that was just because one of them looked like George Clooney. And next thing you know, this guy in black leather shows up. First I'm thinking, PR stunt for Syriana, and boy, do I want to get my picture in the papers with George Clooney, so I'm taking out my cell phone which has a camera and tell Sue-Lynn to press the button, and then I fling myself between them. Then this freak turns around and - well, you've got it digitally. Did you see those teeth and the nose? Is that the result of the bird flu or something? Because I'm moving to Canada if it is."
*Picture of Angel in game face*
Investigating Charlene's claim, The Daily Bugle found others willing to step forward and talk about New York's newest superpowered plague. "Him? Black leather, build like a trunk, serious anger issues? Sure, I've seen him," Fred Ivins, 54, confirmed. Ivins, a butcher from Queens, observed the creature stealing blood. "So I say, buddy, you're gonna pay more for that if you want me to keep quiet, and he does this phantom of the opera impression. Is that the result of those human/animal hybrid things the President said he's against in his state of the union speech? I'm so with him there. Voting Republican from now on, you betcha. Those things shouldn't be allowed to exist!"
As to what Fang Man might be up to, other than spreading terror among tourists, butchers and New Yorkers alike: we're not sure. Approached by us, representatives of OsCorp and Campbell Industries, the two firms most closely tied to past vigilantes, declined to comment. This uncharacteristic silence, especially by publicity eager Todd Campbell, leads us to suspect Fang Man might be threaten either or both companies to pay for his services or suffer the fate the Daily Bugle had faced during the Goblin's recent rampage. Our advice: don't give in to terrorists! Never give up, never surrender!