FIC: Thou Wilt Quake For This (9/9)

[tkel_paris]

Title: Thou Wilt Quake For This
Genre: Much Ado About Nothing
Rating: T (except for the DVD extra)
Author: tkel_paris
Summary: Benedick and Beatrice have found themselves forced to marry. While their family and friends are determined to make them fall in love, a chance emerges to expose the villains who trapped them. Can they succeed and protect Hero?

Comments

[sykira]

I'm commenting before I've barely started this chapter, before I've got carried away as I have done, getting caught up in the romance, but I do keep meaning to say your Shakespearean dialogue is utterly SPECTACULAR. If I didn't know this play by heart I wouldn't know that you've made so much up from scratch and yet woven it seamlessly into actual lines from the play. I am so amazed by that. It's that very challenge that both stumped and spurred me me when it came to writing mine--how on earth to recreate this lyrical roundabout way of speaking that communicates while often not saying that at all. You do it not just impeccably, but poetically, and that's part of why you really REALLY could and should just re-work the Josie-specific references out of this and publish it, hon, because writing like Shakespeare is a rare skill indeed!

[sykira]

...as Beatrice joined Benedick at the altar: he offered his left hand - palm upwards - to her. She placed her right hand over his, apparently accepting his protection implicitly. Then Benedick covered her hand with his other and drew her nearer.

Is this a tradition thing? I absolutely LOVE it!

And I love Benedick making sure Hero is out of harm's way with Bea before everything goes down and I ADORE Innogen smacking Don John a good one YUSSSSSSS! Brilliant!

[sykira]

"and yet I would be cautious in accepting him again, Cousin: a man who trust'd his lady as half himself having taken the time to know her ways would have never been so deceiv'd no matter how much drink was plied into his stomach.”"

YES! SOOOOO much wiser than how it actually ended to have Claudio held to account and do penance, and work his way back to Hero's good graces (and bloody well grow up a bit while he's at it!) but I think sadly at the time people were so misogynistic it just would have translated as Hero being rejected at the altar if the marriage hadn't gone ahead there and then :(

[tkel_paris]

Hmm... I'm wanting to write one where Hero gets to make another choice. I'll have to think about the social mores that would permit that. I think it'd be up to Benedick presenting it in such a way that Leonato's own honor can be used to defend his taking Hero back. Maybe. We'll see.

I liked that line of mine. Thought it was genius. :)

[tkel_paris]

Nah. A thought of mine. Claudio didn't take Hero's hand, just turned as she approached. I thought it'd be a good contrast between the men, and Benedick also wanted to comfort Beatrice and alarm Don John at once. *evil grin*

Yeah, it quickly dawned on me that he would ensure his cousin was safe. He wouldn't trust anyone right then. Except for Beatrice. And I owe TM yet again for dialogue. Innogen's lines wouldn't be the lovely thing they were without hir's suggestion. *bows for both of us*

[tkel_paris]

*takes a deep breath* Okay... One more project for once NaNo is over. *rubs hands* Anything that should perhaps be expanded given that I'll be removing the obvious? Perhaps the exact deception should be described to set the stage?

[sykira]

Ah…the deception rewrite would be tricky, I personally would cut out the paint altogether, I don't think I ever did reply to you on that did I? *goes to see*

[tkel_paris]

Eh, anything that screams 2011 version would have to go. I'd have to research to be able to justify keeping Innogen (and may have to give her a different name, even). But... it'd be a good challenge. :)