FIC: Blind Date (5/5)
Title: Blind Date
Genre: Doctor Who
Rating: T
Author: tkel_paris
Summary: Caving to the pressure of his parents to find a wife, the Doctor goes on Jack Harkness' dating show. Four women have been selected, and he has to choose one to go out with for a month. Can his sanity - what there is of it - survive long enough to make the best choice?
Disclaimer: I'm going into major alternate reality terms. That should assure you I own nothing.
Dedication: cassikat, as I'm not going to be able to finish the next installment of The Noble Girl in time for your birthday. Not with Camp NaNo and a major chess tournament coming to Phoenix in August, along with my parents.
Author's Note: A random thought that amused my beta when I mentioned it. A few ideas were tossed back and forth, and this was the end result. Written during Camp NaNo July 2015. I owe my beta a lot for transforming the story from something too American to something more based on the show Blind Date from across the pond. And for making sure that the details mentioned about life in England were accurate. Also, y'all should know that tardis_mole informed me that the host for the original Blind Date show, Cilla Black, died during the writing of this story. All that's known as of the post date is that she collapsed in the heat.
Critical Note: All answers given by the guests are based on things they actually said in canon, things said about them that were not disputed, ways they acted, or things outright implied. Do not snap at me or my beta. Snap at RTD and the Moff for writing said things, and permitting them to go on air.
Chapter One / Chapter Two / Chapter Three / Chapter Four
Blind Date
Started July 18, 2015
Finished August 7, 2015
Chapter Five: The Follow-Up
One month later...
The segment of the theme played to signal to the audience that they were coming back from commercial break. Not that the Applause sign was not an indication.
Jack stood in the now huge area, casting approving grins at the couple seated behind him. “Welcome back! We're about to find out how the Doctor and Donna Noble have fared since they were matched a month ago. Tonight's guests actually have a connection to that show. As I mentioned before introducing her that our selector tonight, Martha Jones, was one of the ladies who came on to be considered by the Doctor. And her choice, Mickey Smith, used to be Rose's boyfriend. I suppose her coming on the show was the deal-breaker in the relationship?”
Mickey gave a tight grin, eyes drifting to the angry, glaring blonde in the audience. “We were going toward a break-up for a while, but that was the last straw for me.”
Martha shrugged. “I think Mickey is far better suited for me than the Doctor, so I have to thank him for not choosing me.”
“Well, are you curious to know how they're doing?” Jack asked.
“Yes,” Martha chimed, with Mickey nodding - much more sedately.
“Great!” Jack cheered. “Before we bring them out, it's time to let everyone know how the other two guests are faring. Rose is not working as a self stacker anymore. Our producers uncovered that she was fired after the show, and is on her third job since. And I hear she's had to answer some questions from the police. Oh, and the friend she mentioned is not on speaking terms with her anymore since she's also had to answer some questions.”
The camera showed the viewers at home Rose sitting sullenly next to Jackie, who had only come to eye one of the producers who was eyeing her back. Only a few members of the audience had the slightest clue.
“As for River, she's now living on Earth. Evidently the Gallifreyan High Council was alarmed by some of her statements and... well, it's not quite clear what happened. River won't admit to it, but it appears that her ability to travel through time and possibly regenerate were both taken away from her. It sounds like the probable circumstances of her birth is - historically speaking - dangerous. To whom, we don't know, but she did admit to working for a contractor to a museum.”
River appeared on screen while Jack talked, trying to be flirty in a relaxed way and failing hugely. She was surrounded by people unimpressed with her, and she lacked her hallucinogenic lipstick.
Jack continued, “Now we have on the phone the people who made the Doctor come on our show. His parents, all the way from Gallifrey. This is unusual to even get people from that world on the phone, but they declined to actually appear on the show. We're speaking with Hera and Zeus. Yes, those are the transliterations of their names into English. Hello!”
“Mr Harkness,” they said as one.
“So it's common knowledge that Gallifreyans avoid the spotlight. At least the respectable ones. And your house is a highborn one as I understand. Never mind that the Doctor has been known to help those in need and enjoyed a relative anonymity. So why would you force him to appear on the show?”
Hera answered, primly and plainly. “Our son has always been headstrong and different from what is expected from our culture. While that has enabled him to stop threats to time and prevent takeovers of Gallifrey by rogue Time Lords, it has also made it next to impossible to find him a wife.”
“Our marriage was arranged, as marriages were before the Last Great Time War,” Zeus admitted. “But we turned out to be compatible. Unfortunately, the marriage arranged for our son was incompatible in every respect except genetic. He hid it well, but we knew that he was secretly relieved when she fell ill with an untreatable terminal illness. Only his love for his children prevented him from actually cheering from the release.”
“Ouch,” Jack murmured, at the same moment that the audience made noises of empathy or horror.
“There was a second marriage forced on him, this time by the High Council in an attempt to rein him in,” Hera added. “But she was as headstrong as he, and the respect they had developed for each other led them to not complete the marriage. She ultimately chose another, and the Council had to stop making plans because our son had overturned too many plots against them.”
“The show seemed like a perfect lesson for him, to remind him of his responsibilities to the family line,” Zeus explained. “And we had a sense that it would put him on the path to finding someone he could make a good marriage with.”
Jack nodded. “So what did you two think of the guests selected for him to choose from?”
Their answers were restrained in their tone, but the words were not. Hera led the charge.
“Miss Jones seemed like a lovely young lady, with her head firmly on her shoulders. But in watching her reactions we were concerned that she lacked the maturity to stop him when he needed to be, to remind him to think. I do hope I do not offend, Miss Jones.”
Martha smiled wryly. “I understand. You're probably right. I was a little star-struck by him, and not seeing who he really was.”
“And we respect you for that.”
“And what about the other guests?” Jack inquired.
Zeus took his turn. “We found Miss Song too arrogant and did not seem that she was ready to settle down. She had an intelligent mind, and we could not understand how she did not see the consequences of her actions. And as for Miss Tyler, she is clearly too immature for our son and lacks both an adult mindset and the perspective needed to handle the differences between them. We were appalled that she was even a candidate.”
River's reaction was nearly impassive, but she took it with calm. Rose however looked like she was ready to protest, and would have if her mother did not pinch her to remind her that she could be thrown out for saying the wrong things.
“Well, I think she was included based on comments from your son's former colleagues from Earth, but perhaps those impressions were inaccurate,” Jack admitted. “And what about Donna? Did you approve of his choice?”
“Yes, in every respect,” Hera declared, pleasure breaking through the otherwise impassive tone. “She is strong enough to hold firm when he is missing the point, and wise enough to respect his knowledge of the universe and time. And we had always been aware that he held a fondness for ginger hair, so we held hope that he would be more than willing to father more children.”
“We hope that our instincts were correct,” Zeus added.
“Thank you, Hera and Zeus. Now we were unable to get Donna's family on the show. Her father is, sadly, ill with cancer and unable to travel. Her grandfather is recovering from illness, otherwise he said he would've represented the entire family today. And her mother... Let's just say she made it plain she didn't approve that her daughter was trying a dating show. I believe the word 'desperate' was used.”
The audience gave off mostly boos, and other negative sounds.
Jack nodded grimly. “But I hope that her opinion will be altered by what we learn tonight. Please welcome back to our stage, the Doctor and Donna!”
Cheering overwhelmed as Jack, Martha, and Mickey stood to welcome the pair. The room was made to wait a moment before the duo strolled hand in hand onto stage to applause, grinning widely and looking every bit the couple.
The Doctor was dressed in what looked like the same suit, his hair even wilder than when he saw Donna. But Donna was strikingly different, wearing an ankle-length Regency-style dress in a rich orange fine lace over red satin. The neckline covered her cleavage completely, and her hair's natural waves were loose.
Jack, who normally hugged returning guests, stilled as he watched them sit down. “Wow, Donna. You look more confident and self-assured. I saw the photos you submitted and you usually wore muted colours and several layers. This is more 'look at me I'm beautiful'. Which you always were, but now you look like you believe it.”
The audience noted his stunned tone, and the applause died down as the pin slowly dropped that something major had changed in addition to the outer details. If the Boe-Kind was not flirting at all, then things were far more serious between the pair than expected.
Martha was the first to speak. “Yes, you're both glowing. And Donna, what's that on your hand?”
Donna sighed and held up her left hand with a squeal. The diamond ring caught all eyes instantly and led to shocked cheering.
“I'd say you were merely engaged except for that platinum band sitting next to the rock ring,” Jack remarked. “You two lovebirds eloped?”
The Doctor's already big grin turned even more massive. “Well, I'll admit... we used my time machine, so it's been more than a month for us. It's been a year since we were last here; and we eloped what was three months ago for us.”
Some of cheering turned into hooting as some expressed their approval of how fast they moved. And on the phone the Doctor's parents were so overjoyed they were completely silent.
Jack took another look at Donna. “Got some other news for us?”
They startled.
The Boe-Kind shrugged. “Beautiful women with curves don't wear dresses quite like that unless they're trying to conceal something. Most think they have to hide what the Press considers a less than perfect figure, but I doubt that's the case given what you wore to the last time you were here.”
Donna sighed and looked at her husband. “You were right. He did spot it almost immediately.”
The Doctor's grin was unrepentant as his free hand moved to smooth over her belly, making it obvious what her dress had been minimizing the appearance of.
News of children resulting from the unions of the show always produced cheering from the audience, and the knowledge that a species they all wished to see continue was secured for one more generation left the audience as a whole beyond delighted.
River shrugged and applauded. A child was not in her plans anytime soon, although she had no problem with them, so she decided then and there that the better woman had won.
Rose was struck dumb and numb. Motherhood had not been in her consideration when she came on the show, and his questions about parenting suddenly took on a new light. He was looking for a mother for his children even if he was denying looking for a woman in any sense for himself, or at least intended to use it to eliminate women he wanted nothing to do with. And she qualified on that score. She had eliminated herself - possibly early on in the competition, if not before he had even said a word.
It was a mortifying realization. She looked at her mother, who was eyeing her tightly. “I never thought that anything I did would remove me from consideration for anything.”
Jackie rolled her eyes. “You've done it before, several times, and didn't know it. You probably were on your way to being eliminated before you even said a word.”
Only shock kept Rose from retorting to that.
Donna blushed under the scrutiny, but never lost her beaming smile.
Jack finally stopped applauding. “I knew you had the expectant mother's glow, but your belly is already showing?”
“I'm carrying three.”
“Triplets?” more than one person exclaimed, even in the audience.
Mickey's eyes were huge. “Gordon Bennett!!! Sounds like Time Lord sperm are making up for lost time. Literally.”
The unthinking remark made many laugh, and the married couple blush.
Martha leaned in. “Donna, given how you were talking I thought this wouldn't have happened so quickly. How did he get you to change your mind?”
The Doctor blushed that time, rubbing his face to try to remove the awkward look on it. There was no escaping telling this.
Donna patted his knee and replied calmly. “He took me on whirlwind tour of the universe and time, trying to impress me. What he didn't count on was that I'd be more impressed with the places and people, and would keep ribbing him.”
“Ribbing me? You called a clunky giant spaceship a Ferarri and suggested my TARDIS wasn't anywhere near special,” the Doctor complained.
“She doesn't look as amazing as she is,” she patiently reminded him. “She knew I wasn't insulting her. You're the one who took offence.”
“Well, it stung,” he whined.
“I think it motivated you on our wedding night,” she smirked.
His blush deepened, but his eyes narrowed. “You left me no choice.”
“Aw, Spaceman, you have nothing to prove. And I'm the only one who's going to know the proof for a long time.”
Laughter spread across the room, covering that two in the audience were mourning that they would not get the chance to find out for themselves.
“So you've married someone so much older than yourself, Donna,” Jack remarked casually. “Is he set in his ways?”
“Well, he had a lot of annoying habits, but I've just managed to knock his ego down to a manageable size. And convince him that it's rude to eat jam directly from the jar, with his fingers.”
On the phone, Hera gasped. “Donna, I've been working on him to stop that for millennia. How did you get him to stop?”
Donna blushed brightly. “Um... I sleep with him.”
She was not going to admit the reward she used as re-enforcement while training him out of that habit. Or a few other annoying habits he had. He was finally wearing socks all the time, and matching ones at that.
“Oh...” The trailing off murmur explained it all.
The Doctor's blush was mixed with an awkward grin. “I don't even miss it now.”
“Really?” Jack pressed. “So she hasn't convinced you to give up anything else?”
“Only ones that really were problems, and I won't admit to them even under torture.”
“And I'll never say what they were because I love and respect him too much,” Donna interjected.
The men in the audience cheered the loudest.
The Doctor's lips twisted into a smirk. “And I hope that every man who ever dismissed Donna has realised what he lost out on. But my gain. Women on Gallifrey normally tie their hair up upon marriage, but she chooses to let her rich ginger curls be loose around her shoulders to show that she's still her own person. Curls I begged her to stop straightening within an inch of their life.” he finished, face returning to normal as he grinned proudly at her. "And she's willing to wear the colours of my House as a gesture of respect, which neither of my other wives would do."
She took his hand and laughed on a sigh. “He's an excited puppy sometimes, but he has these moments of incredibly gentle patience and I wouldn't have him any other way. At least this him, but I hope we both live long enough that I don't have to witness a regeneration. Not that I wouldn't still love him.”
“And what if he turned into a she?” Jack asked pointedly.
Rose's eyes went wider than the camera lenses at the thought that the Doctor could have changed on her. She was almost as horrified that River seemed unperturbed by the idea.
Donna shrugged. “Maybe I would have to become a little more flexible. The Doctor would still be my spouse.”
The Doctor sighed in relief, hugging her tightly.
The audience's reaction was mixed, but overall there was a sense that they were impressed with her.
Jack grinned in delight. “So how does each of you measure up to the other's dreams? Did you ever picture being with someone like your spouse?”
The Doctor answered first. “I didn't let myself think about my dream woman. I'll admit, I'd had images of meeting Donna because of part of our training as Time Lords, but I'd almost forgotten about it. I've always held a fascination with ginger hair, and I think that was the origin of it. I knew that my planet needed to be repopulated, but I never agreed with the others enough for me to think that I could manage to find a woman I could marry and raise a family with. I also wondered if I was even capable of being a good husband or father. Once I saw Donna it felt like the universe - which I have been convinced for centuries hates me - was giving me the white flag and saying that it gave up trying to make my life miserable. And she's happy to go along with my preferred life, and even won't ask me to become Human for her. So few would even think of that, let alone believe it and live it. She's the most important woman in the whole of creation, and I'm the luckiest person alive to call her my wife.”
Awing broke out across the audience, and even Mickey seemed impressed.
Jack nodded approvingly. He turned to her. “Donna, what about you? You said that you normally don't go for skinny boys, as you described him. What do you think of him?”
Donna blushed, thinking for a moment about how much to admit to. Finally she decided to be a little franker than she otherwise would have considered. “It's true, I never did consider men who look like their coat wouldn't fit a rat attractive. And... well, if you look carefully at his facial features individually you wouldn't think he was a handsome man. And yet it works, as much because he has lovely eyes and an engaging smile as the features balancing each other out. It was during our first adventure together that I noticed - mostly thanks to those tight suits he wears - that he has a nice bum.”
Several bursts of hooting - from any gender - affirmed that the opinion was popular. Enough so that the Doctor's face tried and failed to mimic Donna's hair color.
She hugged him against her. “Mind, you can't assume that's a sign that a man knows how to please his partner - whether for sex or love-making.”
Jackie gave Rose a pointed glare. “I told you.”
Donna continued, unaware of the possible shouting match brewing in the audience. “But what I always wanted was a man who loved me for me - faults and all, especially the hair colour that's been the bane of my existence - and could give me excitement, a sense that my life was meaningful. He gave me that within hours of my joining him on adventures, and he treated me more like a Queen than I thought a man would ever do for me. And it was the little things he did that convinced me that he really had fallen in love with me. So it was easier than I thought possible to let myself fall for him. And I probably had little choice in that given how attentive and loving he was. My gramps always said that the men with the biggest hearts show it in little ways, and the Doctor proved that daily. So I caved and asked him to marry me.”
The women in the audience were the most reactive to that admission.
Donna gave an awkward grin. “Yeah, it could've backfired on me and probably would've had he been Human. But apparently it fit within Gallifreyan traditions, and it worked for us. We went for consent from my dad and granddad because that's critical to Gallifreyan marriage.”
They were not going to admit that her mother had left already, refusing her own consent. So her granddad had to act in her place.
“I'm happy,” Donna said, hiding her feelings behind a warm smile. “Beyond happy. I always felt like I had to shout at the world because no one would listen to me. Aside from my dad, my gramps, and my gran - rest her soul. The Doctor makes me feel like I don't need to anymore, so I feel so much calmer. Oh, I still get to yell at the world, mostly because we're confronting tyrants and other egomaniacs. But I hope that his people's society is more relaxed, because after the stories I've heard I have some things to say to any High Council stuffed shirts who want to challenge me.”
Jack laughed. “So you haven't met the High Council yet?”
“No, she hasn't. And I'm looking forward to that,” the Doctor proudly announced.
“Donna?” Hera spoke, hiding her and Zeus' dismay that some things about their son were not altered by marriage.
“Yes?”
“You truly are perfect for him. You give me hope that Gallifrey can be reborn and heal. You don't know how much of an inspiration and role model you shall be to our people.”
Donna looked uneasy. “Um... thanks. I think."
"We certainly look forward to meeting you at last," Zeus added.
The Doctor hugged her and whispered into her ear, the words not caught by the audio. Whatever he said, it was enough to make Donna smile and add, "And I you."
Jack laughed and stood. “Well, that's all the time we have! Tune in next time as we invite someone to...”
“Find Your Destiny!” shouted the audience.
“Good night, everyone!”
As the applause took over the audible sound, Martha and Mickey stood to shake hands again with the other couple and ask questions. Jack stood aside and let them talk as he walked to the side to shake hands with excited audience members before chatting a little with the other two guests from the last time. River happily flirted back, but Rose was too downtrodden to even respond in the slightest to Jack's flirting.
The two happy couples hardly noticed anything around them. Instead the women were trading promises to stay in touch, and the Doctor was offering advice to Mickey on how to pick himself up from a bad relationship and be ready for the newer and better one.
The future was plainly bright for both couples. And many audience members hoped that the mother who had spoken poorly of her daughter would be proud of her in the end and adore her yet to be born grandchildren.
THE END