maybe if i wasnt so good at alienating myself

[tjackson]

if i can keep moving, academically and spiritually, through this mind-blowing grief ... i might almost make it. right now it's hard to find hope though. it really really is.

oddly enough this song popped in my head tonight, in the midst of grief ... then i learned it was played this evening in concert in Detroit ... the first time live (in its entirity) in ten years.

Born to please, every simple need
I stand alone in my thoughts indeed
Hate you
For ever making me
I'm in you, I'm your anything

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

Come to me, let me hold you still
I'm so tired, just as tired as you
Take me for anyone but me
All that you feel is never true

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

When you say that you are
Forever my star
Could never let you go, no, no
And never let you know

Let roar these fears
To the whore of my tears
Pure as a lie, I pour to your eyes
Suck you like the sap from a tree
Honey from the dew, from the bumblebees, yeah yeah

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

When you say that you are
Forever my star
Could never let you go, no, no
Never let you know

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you