Aaaaargh!
My post office is retarded and won't deliver my mail. Seriously, I ordered a book about Amenhotep III for one of my classes from Amazon back in mid-April. A couple days ago, I contacted the seller on Amazon and asked where my book was. They tracked the package at the USPS website and got a message saying that delivery had been attempted back on May 5th, and they had left a notice. Which, of course, they hadn't. So I called USPS yesterday to see if I could get a redelivery scheduled. Of course, they have one of those asshole computerized systems where you talk to it and it tries to guess what you're saying. The conversation was going fine until it had me spell out my name. The following exchange occurred:
Perky USPS Computer: Please spell your first name!
Me: M. E. G. A. E. R. A.
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: M! . . . E! . . . G! . . . A! . . . E! . . . R! . . . A!
P.U.C.: I got your name as: "Floobathon," spelled GYRRRRRH8QFLK. Is this correct?
Me: NO!
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: EM! EE! GEE! AY! EE! ARR! AY!
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: EEEEEEMMM. EEEEEE. GEEEEEE. AAAAAAAAAAY. EEEEEEE. ARRRRRR. AAAAAAAA.
P.U.C.: I got your name as: "Gribnor," spelled TUSX. Is that correct?
Me: GAAAH! NO, YOU FUCKTARDED MACHINE! NO!
P.U.C.: Allow me to connect you to a representative.
So, I talked to a human, who was very pleasant and helpful and set up a redelivery for today. The mail came today, and no book was in it. I tried to check the status of my redelivery order on the website, and got a message saying that no such order existed and directing me to the contact form. I sent a message carefully explaining what had happened, and got a message back, apologizing and cheerfully telling me to request another redelivery, USING INFORMATION FROM MY REDELIVERY NOTICE. WHICH I NEVER GOT. I went back to the website and tried to request a new redelivery, and got a message saying that the package had already been returned to the sender. I sent what was probably an overly snippy message back to the guy who had replied to my help request, asking what I can do to make sure that my damn mail actually gets delivered to me, and I emailed the company asking if they could send the package back when it came back to them.
AAAARGH.
Perky USPS Computer: Please spell your first name!
Me: M. E. G. A. E. R. A.
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: M! . . . E! . . . G! . . . A! . . . E! . . . R! . . . A!
P.U.C.: I got your name as: "Floobathon," spelled GYRRRRRH8QFLK. Is this correct?
Me: NO!
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: EM! EE! GEE! AY! EE! ARR! AY!
P.U.C.: Please spell your first name!
Me: EEEEEEMMM. EEEEEE. GEEEEEE. AAAAAAAAAAY. EEEEEEE. ARRRRRR. AAAAAAAA.
P.U.C.: I got your name as: "Gribnor," spelled TUSX. Is that correct?
Me: GAAAH! NO, YOU FUCKTARDED MACHINE! NO!
P.U.C.: Allow me to connect you to a representative.
So, I talked to a human, who was very pleasant and helpful and set up a redelivery for today. The mail came today, and no book was in it. I tried to check the status of my redelivery order on the website, and got a message saying that no such order existed and directing me to the contact form. I sent a message carefully explaining what had happened, and got a message back, apologizing and cheerfully telling me to request another redelivery, USING INFORMATION FROM MY REDELIVERY NOTICE. WHICH I NEVER GOT. I went back to the website and tried to request a new redelivery, and got a message saying that the package had already been returned to the sender. I sent what was probably an overly snippy message back to the guy who had replied to my help request, asking what I can do to make sure that my damn mail actually gets delivered to me, and I emailed the company asking if they could send the package back when it came back to them.
AAAARGH.