why maintain misunderstandings?
why bring out the worst in myself.
why the ruthless nature of mistreatment applied to myself.
why the abusive techniques. why the lies and manipulations.
i am not allowed to live. why? it is not just or right.
i am being kept demented and confused.
i don't care who knows about my situation because i am a victim. i guess the abusers should go on and be allowed to actually have lives... i'm not like them... still... in my confined torment i wonder... why am -I- the one who is misrepresented and isn't allowed to live.
i don't want to abide by the bad therapy where they hurt me if i don't act how they want. i don't want to dance for them. they hurt me. it seems that I can only be around abusers who have to go to therapy because they feel bad for hurting me. and then hurt me more when i mention the abuse that has gone unidentified. my own life, i am left ignorant to. it's a sad spell that traps me.
now i'm afraid of physical symptoms. it appears my throat is irritated. how is that going to effect my smoking career *hackle,harr,harr*. the terrible people. why did they end my life and make it degress to such a negative point?
is the truth too awful to bare?
i write here, because i feel otherwise neglected for company that would remember my statements. my desire to live a full healthy life. and the company i wish to have.
i want to live in a happy place. i feel that i deserve to be fully informed and not by some irrational person screaming at me because they're so tierd of listening to me trying to de-scramble the pieces.
please help me feel better and help me to find my way to a happier life.
i use the simple word 'happier', i suppose that doesn't explain much.
i won't mention names, simply because i wouldn't know what i was talking about, most likely. i don't know. i'm ignorant.
-to those i could possibly call friends or family
why the ruthless nature of mistreatment applied to myself.
why the abusive techniques. why the lies and manipulations.
i am not allowed to live. why? it is not just or right.
i am being kept demented and confused.
i don't care who knows about my situation because i am a victim. i guess the abusers should go on and be allowed to actually have lives... i'm not like them... still... in my confined torment i wonder... why am -I- the one who is misrepresented and isn't allowed to live.
i don't want to abide by the bad therapy where they hurt me if i don't act how they want. i don't want to dance for them. they hurt me. it seems that I can only be around abusers who have to go to therapy because they feel bad for hurting me. and then hurt me more when i mention the abuse that has gone unidentified. my own life, i am left ignorant to. it's a sad spell that traps me.
now i'm afraid of physical symptoms. it appears my throat is irritated. how is that going to effect my smoking career *hackle,harr,harr*. the terrible people. why did they end my life and make it degress to such a negative point?
is the truth too awful to bare?
i write here, because i feel otherwise neglected for company that would remember my statements. my desire to live a full healthy life. and the company i wish to have.
i want to live in a happy place. i feel that i deserve to be fully informed and not by some irrational person screaming at me because they're so tierd of listening to me trying to de-scramble the pieces.
please help me feel better and help me to find my way to a happier life.
i use the simple word 'happier', i suppose that doesn't explain much.
i won't mention names, simply because i wouldn't know what i was talking about, most likely. i don't know. i'm ignorant.
-to those i could possibly call friends or family