(no subject)
When I was thirteen, young, naive, falling in love and then out of love, i remembered being given this short passage. It did help me move on, grow up and stop being such a whim. If you know me, I'm an emotional dirt bag. And I haven't been one since a teen until.. now. so i shall claim to be 21 but thirteen in emotional age capacity. But that said, I realised that God has given me many omens and yet I refused them all. The last straw. This is it. I'll take it in big gulps and then throw it away, throw it all away. As bad as it is for my physical health, it is as well for my emotional and mental health. I'm no love poet. I'm not pious. It is at times like this when I seek in God more than my everyday prayers. And so I heard, there is no such thing as eternal love, except that of God's. People change. Both sides for that matter. Objectives and feelings do as well. And again, with that said, moving on is not about finding new love to replace the one's that's lost. Neither is it about who's moving on first and making each other look hideous. I'm good.
"It is a mystery why we fall in love. It is a mystery how it
happens. It is a mystery when it comes. It is a mystery why
some love grows and it is a mystery why some love fails.
You can analyze this mystery and look for reasons and
causes, but you will never do anymore that take the life out
of the experience. Just as life itself is more than the sum of
the bones and muscles and electrical impulses in the body,
love is more than the sum of the interests and attractions
and commonalities that two people share. And just as life
itself is a gift that comes and goes in its own time, so too, the
coming of love must be taken as an unfathomable gift that
cannot be questioned in its ways.
Sometimes, hopefully at least once in your life - the gift of
love will come to you in full flower. Take hold of it and
celebrate it in all inexpressible beauty. This is the dream we
all share. More often, it will come and take hold of you,
celebrate you for a brief moment, then move on.
When this happen to young people, they too often try to
grasp the love and hold it to them, refusing to see that it is a
gift that just as freely comes, moves away. When they fall out of
love, or the person they love feels the spirit of love leaving,
they try desperately to reclaim the love that is lost rather
than accepting the gift for what it was, then moving on.
They want answers where there are no answers. They
want to know what is wrong in them that makes the other
person no longer love them, or try to get their love to change,
thinking that if some small things were different, love would
bloom again. They blame their circumstances and say that if
they go far away and start a new life, their love will grow.
They try anything to give meaning to what has happened. But
there is no meaning beyond the love itself, until they
accept its own mysterious ways."
So God, it's rather blesphemous to put my prayer up in my blog. But I know You watch and listen to me at all times. So I pray that you'll give me strength and patience to ride these tough times and him, give him your guidance and keep him safe. Amin.