i can't be who you are.
i kinda feel like i'm going to throw up.
that omg i'm so nervous i could poop my pants feeling i get when i'm on line to go on a roller coaster or when i really really like someone.
only i'm only on a metaphoric roller coaster, and last i checked it would be pretty much insane for me to entertain the idea of liking someone right about now.
i hate feeling anxious. which is ironic bc i feel like this all the time, and am quite prone to panic attacks. i haven't had one in a few weeks though, and i don't fucking want one now.
i don't even really know whats bringing this on, i just have that foreboding feeling in the pit of my stomach.
i think I'm putting a lot of pressure on myself. but i don't know how to live any other way, unless its the summer in which case i'm apparently totally okay with doing absolutely nothing, which to be quite honest i'm regretting now thanks to my extreme lack of funds. oh well heres to having three jobs this semester.
pretty much the only thing I can think of to make me feel better would be talking to my best friend but she of course has no fucking phone. =[
i think i need a really mild dose of anti anxiety medication....
I just want to be the best at everything, and being so fucking busy and being pulled in a bunch of different directions is really going to limit my ability to rock everything.
i really miss my sister.
that omg i'm so nervous i could poop my pants feeling i get when i'm on line to go on a roller coaster or when i really really like someone.
only i'm only on a metaphoric roller coaster, and last i checked it would be pretty much insane for me to entertain the idea of liking someone right about now.
i hate feeling anxious. which is ironic bc i feel like this all the time, and am quite prone to panic attacks. i haven't had one in a few weeks though, and i don't fucking want one now.
i don't even really know whats bringing this on, i just have that foreboding feeling in the pit of my stomach.
i think I'm putting a lot of pressure on myself. but i don't know how to live any other way, unless its the summer in which case i'm apparently totally okay with doing absolutely nothing, which to be quite honest i'm regretting now thanks to my extreme lack of funds. oh well heres to having three jobs this semester.
pretty much the only thing I can think of to make me feel better would be talking to my best friend but she of course has no fucking phone. =[
i think i need a really mild dose of anti anxiety medication....
I just want to be the best at everything, and being so fucking busy and being pulled in a bunch of different directions is really going to limit my ability to rock everything.
i really miss my sister.