whatever man, i know you probably expect me to be this happy go lucky smile on my face 24/7 guy. cause nothing but good things happen in my life right. I think its the complete opposite. I've probably always been an angry person because everytime my life starts to see a little bit of goodness, it gets taken away before it can even start. ALWAYS! so sorry im an angry person all the time, i don't give a fuck, i can't help it. Maybe if better things would come my way i wouldnt be as bad of an asshole. And yes you did help me get a job at kilwins, but not to the point of where im at now, and i swear to god dude if u tell me that all the shit i do there sucks because i suck at the job i swear to god i will rip your fucking balls off. I work my ass off at that place, even certain people at that job tell me i take it and do a more serious job there then you do. So don't you dare ever tell me that I suck at it. The whole shit with you and rana, you should have seen that coming. I tell you about a girl i like a lot and I went on a date with her and I was still trying to see if it was going anywhere and what do you do? "Whats her name again, Rana?" I introduce the 2 of you from the jacuzzi to the time i brought her over to eric's. Then you both started hanging out and became friends, and then you both decide he lets start dating and tell everyone we're official now but ryan. Yeah that was great fucking news coming from ranas mouth, "So did you know me and zach are official now?" Ok rana, what the hell does official mean? "We're like a dating couple now, its wonderful." Yeah, you made my fucking day dude with that one. Guess I didn't deserve to be mad about that one right? So yeah, you may be somewhat friends with people over at club hole but you still dont slowly and as silent as you can be walk into their house, creep into the music room and start loading up your shit, jason was cool about it to you but he was kinda pissed cause it could have been anyone just walking in taking shit randomly. And you don;t even really know them that well so what the fuck, "Ok rana, lets just be as quiet as we can so ryan doesnt hear us." Yeah good call on that one. But whatever dude, all i know is for now stay the fuck away from me until i guess i've become a better person and im not so angry. But hell you of all people should know that we have no idea if that will ever happen. Oh and I know rana might be confused on why I'm mad at her as well, well if you both didnt mock me and make fun of me while i wasn;t at the house and later find out from everyone else what you guys said then maybe i wouldnt be mad at that either. Yeah, some friends, I've stuck behind rana's back for a lot of shit at that house and i've dont nothing but good things for her and all she can do is mock me and make fun of me, well fuck you both for that. True friends, thats what we are right, or wait sorry, its were, thats the more proper word for it now.
Look, I've never mocked you or made fun of you for anything, why would I do that? I know you've always been there for me and been a good friend, and I have done the same in return. What I don't understand is why you're backing up your other "friends" who pretty much use you for weed and shit. Wasn't I the one who just about a week or two ago, gave you cash for weed and have lent you cash on the spot a few times for weed and other stuff? Is that mocking you? I think not. I stay out of what you and Zach's problems are, PERIOD. IT'S NOT MY BUSINESS.
And don't make you liking me personal to Zach, I've told you many times I like you as a friend and nothing more, and I stated this also the night we went to Carabba's. I have no problem going out with friends to eat or something and have a nice chat but other than that, don't go making up things in your head about what it means.
We weren't creeping around, we just needed one amp and to leave because we had things to do, and we don't go walking around thinking "shhhh let's not wake Ryan".
Bottom line, I did absolutely nothing against you and I have been there for you, yet you're siding with everyone else, who use you to get weed and [in the past] alcohol and even lots of money's worth of food and shit which they never paid back or even said thank you for, from what I can remember.
I'm just overall disappointed that you of all people, who has seen me be treated like shit by Will so long ago, also saw me get over that, slowly, and regain some sanity and find someone I can be with happily. You have seen me be completely stressed out by school and work and still come home to cook food and clean, and I have shared pretty much anything I have with you if you wanted it. So I just don't see why you are ignoring this fact and going on the basis of this "he said she said" bullshit. In this entire situation, I have done nothing wrong, and still get treated like shit.
its weird too rana, since we've been over at josh's mom's instead of the house, josh, will, and I seemed to have become better friends then even before cause i guess there's just something in you AND josh's house that seemed to make us sometimes want to kill eachother. Could be anytihng, guess i cant pinpoint it at the moment, but i've liked it like that. We talked about all the good times we've had and the good ole days, good shit, cause lets see i've been friends with josh for almost 4 years now and will for 3 so yeah i'm gonna be on there side more then anyones and with the whole me and zach thing and you, ok oh wow, whoa, i am happy he is with u and that you are happy i guess but ever since u both started dating thats when u both say to yourselves, ok we'll just stick to ourselves and ignore everyone else. cause thats what u fucking did, even when everything was cool, everytime he came over, it was all about you guys. I mean do you seriosuly think i wanna sit there and chill with you guys when al lyou're doing is kissing hugging, making out and shit, i mean seriosuly imagine if i was with my gf and you wanted to hang out and all i was doing was the shit you guys do. Its fucking rude! yeah a little kiss here and there is fine but you guys make out while im in the middle of talking to you and dont fucking tell me you dont do that because every fucking time i talk to you when you're together 80% of the time that is exactly how it is. so you too go have your wonderful love fulfilled sex you fucking love birds, love is always broken an arrow.
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And don't make you liking me personal to Zach, I've told you many times I like you as a friend and nothing more, and I stated this also the night we went to Carabba's. I have no problem going out with friends to eat or something and have a nice chat but other than that, don't go making up things in your head about what it means.
We weren't creeping around, we just needed one amp and to leave because we had things to do, and we don't go walking around thinking "shhhh let's not wake Ryan".
Bottom line, I did absolutely nothing against you and I have been there for you, yet you're siding with everyone else, who use you to get weed and [in the past] alcohol and even lots of money's worth of food and shit which they never paid back or even said thank you for, from what I can remember.
I'm just overall disappointed that you of all people, who has seen me be treated like shit by Will so long ago, also saw me get over that, slowly, and regain some sanity and find someone I can be with happily. You have seen me be completely stressed out by school and work and still come home to cook food and clean, and I have shared pretty much anything I have with you if you wanted it. So I just don't see why you are ignoring this fact and going on the basis of this "he said she said" bullshit. In this entire situation, I have done nothing wrong, and still get treated like shit.
I don't think I need to say anything else.
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