Okay, sorry, this kind of dovetailed off your prompt.citiesfallingMay 7 2011, 19:20:39 UTC
This is his chance, maybe the last one. Here, in the dark of night, watching Dean sleep like he has always done, Castiel understands that if he can't get through to him, he might never get another shot.
But when Dean wakes and they spiral dangerously towards an altercation, and Father above, Cas can see all the pain splintered in Dean's eyes, he knows he has to stop it now.
Castiel is a devout creature, it's how he's created, and any devout being will always have one option. So Cas drops to his knees and silences Dean entirely.
"Dean. Please. Let me explain." He mutters to the floor. He has stared down archangels and devils, demons and monsters, and he's not sure he can look up, but he does, and he can see that he has Dean's attention, as he always has.
"They keep dangling you in front of me, Dean. Everyone, always, they hold your life in front of me. Where am I supposed to go when every road, every. single. road. Ends with you dead at my feet? And with no one to blame but myself?" Dean looks like he's about to speak, but Castiel cuts him off. "I cannot do this without you. I do not know how I managed before, but I can't go back to that. If this is what I have to do to keep you alive, then I'll do it, and you can be angry and hurt, because you have every right to, Dean, but you have to understand. I did it, all of it, for you."
And he drops his gaze again and prays not to God above, but to Dean in front of him. And Castiel feels a hand tipping his chin up to see that Dean has knelt in front of him, and he presses his forehead to Cas', and whispers "I get it. What can I do?" and Cas can breathe again, he feels a little less like an angel lost on a dark road and more like someone whose prayer for help has been accepted.
But when Dean wakes and they spiral dangerously towards an altercation, and Father above, Cas can see all the pain splintered in Dean's eyes, he knows he has to stop it now.
Castiel is a devout creature, it's how he's created, and any devout being will always have one option. So Cas drops to his knees and silences Dean entirely.
"Dean. Please. Let me explain." He mutters to the floor. He has stared down archangels and devils, demons and monsters, and he's not sure he can look up, but he does, and he can see that he has Dean's attention, as he always has.
"They keep dangling you in front of me, Dean. Everyone, always, they hold your life in front of me. Where am I supposed to go when every road, every. single. road. Ends with you dead at my feet? And with no one to blame but myself?" Dean looks like he's about to speak, but Castiel cuts him off. "I cannot do this without you. I do not know how I managed before, but I can't go back to that. If this is what I have to do to keep you alive, then I'll do it, and you can be angry and hurt, because you have every right to, Dean, but you have to understand. I did it, all of it, for you."
And he drops his gaze again and prays not to God above, but to Dean in front of him. And Castiel feels a hand tipping his chin up to see that Dean has knelt in front of him, and he presses his forehead to Cas', and whispers "I get it. What can I do?" and Cas can breathe again, he feels a little less like an angel lost on a dark road and more like someone whose prayer for help has been accepted.
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omfc their love is so legendary. Insert sobbing Misha .gif here. T.T
YES YES YES. THIS. BRB hiding in this fic until I smell like it. <3 love you for this baby, thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaank you <3 <3 <3
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♥
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These are the words I longed to hear from Dean since the beginning of the season. If only they could hear you...
Loved this.
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