Recent Thoughts
I've been thinking about alot of things lately and some of its good some not as good but I just need to put em down to help me sort through em.
First off I've really gotta be more careful about walking around when I'm drunk. I was in Auburn last weekend at Caroline's house. The house has concrete steps out front. I was on drink number 2, but the first was pretty strong so I was buzzing. The steps have no handrails so when I tried to walk down I ended up busting my ass. The brunt of the fall was taken out on my forearm... I really hope it doesnt scar. Of course I didnt let a fall ruin my drinking...it coulda happened sober... the game ruined my weekend however.
And now for something completely different. In a little over a week I'll be back in WI, which is awesome. I cant wait to be back with my teammates. Being back in Cheeseland does present some potential problems however. I left alot of things to be determined when I get back... like the situation with Hayley and Icepick. I feel like it wasnt fully resolved... but maybe thats just because Hayley keeps holding onto the idea that we will be friends. I dont see us being friends. I feel like she used me to get back at Pick and Tracy. I just didnt want to see it back when it was happening. Now that I've removed my self from the situation and look back at it everyone around me was right. Campbell, Tracy, Perm... they were all right. I was just being an idiot.
Another thing to deal with when I get back to WW is seeing Jess again. Yeah, we've talked since we broke up but I dont really know how I'm gonna react to seeing her again. I broke up with her b/c the calling to the priesthood is getting stronger and stronger and I'm not ready for a strong commitment in a relationship. But I still had feelings for her which arent gone. I didnt break up with her b/c I didnt like her or she upset me... So I guess I'm just worried about how I'm gonna react being around her... WW isnt exactly a place you can lose touch with someone real easily. Plus I dont wanna lose touch, I really enjoy her company. Right now I've decided that we shouldnt get back together b/c the relationship just didnt feel right for different reasons.
The priesthood is another thought that weighs on my thoughts often. I really do want to be a priest these days. You know how when you're a kid and you think I wanna be a fireman, but really you just wanna be a hose man and spray shit... well this is different. I really wanna be a priest. Which is why after I take this year off I think I'm gonna finish up the 3 years I have left of school in 2. I'll have to take summer classes and such but it'll be worth it. I want to get into the seminary asap, but I want to finish up at WW. Its what I set out to do, plus I think its good life experience that'll come in handy when I'm a priest.
Thats pretty much what keeps me awake at night these days. But as I've written this some things have become clearer... which is nice.
First off I've really gotta be more careful about walking around when I'm drunk. I was in Auburn last weekend at Caroline's house. The house has concrete steps out front. I was on drink number 2, but the first was pretty strong so I was buzzing. The steps have no handrails so when I tried to walk down I ended up busting my ass. The brunt of the fall was taken out on my forearm... I really hope it doesnt scar. Of course I didnt let a fall ruin my drinking...it coulda happened sober... the game ruined my weekend however.
And now for something completely different. In a little over a week I'll be back in WI, which is awesome. I cant wait to be back with my teammates. Being back in Cheeseland does present some potential problems however. I left alot of things to be determined when I get back... like the situation with Hayley and Icepick. I feel like it wasnt fully resolved... but maybe thats just because Hayley keeps holding onto the idea that we will be friends. I dont see us being friends. I feel like she used me to get back at Pick and Tracy. I just didnt want to see it back when it was happening. Now that I've removed my self from the situation and look back at it everyone around me was right. Campbell, Tracy, Perm... they were all right. I was just being an idiot.
Another thing to deal with when I get back to WW is seeing Jess again. Yeah, we've talked since we broke up but I dont really know how I'm gonna react to seeing her again. I broke up with her b/c the calling to the priesthood is getting stronger and stronger and I'm not ready for a strong commitment in a relationship. But I still had feelings for her which arent gone. I didnt break up with her b/c I didnt like her or she upset me... So I guess I'm just worried about how I'm gonna react being around her... WW isnt exactly a place you can lose touch with someone real easily. Plus I dont wanna lose touch, I really enjoy her company. Right now I've decided that we shouldnt get back together b/c the relationship just didnt feel right for different reasons.
The priesthood is another thought that weighs on my thoughts often. I really do want to be a priest these days. You know how when you're a kid and you think I wanna be a fireman, but really you just wanna be a hose man and spray shit... well this is different. I really wanna be a priest. Which is why after I take this year off I think I'm gonna finish up the 3 years I have left of school in 2. I'll have to take summer classes and such but it'll be worth it. I want to get into the seminary asap, but I want to finish up at WW. Its what I set out to do, plus I think its good life experience that'll come in handy when I'm a priest.
Thats pretty much what keeps me awake at night these days. But as I've written this some things have become clearer... which is nice.