ho hum
i think i have writers block. well maybe not.
so i think i'm going to quit my job and find another one. looking back i think i told myself i was just going to get the store up and running on their credit cards and then take off. i did a good job, then i let it all go to hell in november/december. im not sure why, no i DO know why, because no one else cared about it so i quit caring about it too. its hard to motivate a whole team when your other two managers don't give a shit and don't back you up. anyway, my new boss told me my focal compensation will be a whopping 2% when all my 30/60/90/120 reviews were above expectations. above expectations = 5%. recession my ass. they can take their 2% and shove it, really. gap never gave me 2% and they are in serious financial dire straights. if they can't let me work 4 tens so i can work at micheals more, or guarantee me 4 hours a week of premium time, or give me another 2 weeks of vacation so i can work full time at micheals, then i'm out. out like a trout.
we have this huge long list of stuff we need to buy for d and his new place. dvd player. dishes. toaster. microwave. bathmat. towels. pencil cup. it's like he's getting parting gifts on a gameshow. my mom and his mom are in on it but i don't have any disposable income these days so i'm not sure what my donation is going to be. probably the broken microwave in the basement. sigh.
i'm fat. i gained back all the weight i lost in december. the pants that have been falling off me are now a bit snug. i think when d moves out i'll probably go into the not eating mode again, because i'm sure i'll think that it's the only thing i can control, since i obviously won't be able to control him anymore. not that i'm controling per se, but i won't have that little piece of personal management. i don't know. it's warming up outside, if i could just quit smoking i could start exercising. what an excuse i know, i need to just get off my fat ass and ride my bike or take millie for more walks.
i miss mark. i think the distance between us is taking it's toll. he's talking about moving back to colorado but i'm not sure it's such a smart decision. if he can transfer with boost it will be good because he'll only have one major change to blame me for in a few years when i go and screw things up and ruin our friendship (talk about self-fullfilling prophecy). i hope if he does decide to move he gets a loft or something downtown so that he's close, but not TOO close. he would be sad i think, if he knew i felt that way. it's like, i want him around all the time but sometimes i just want to be totally alone. boy, that time is coming up faster than i'm prepared for. i freak out because i'm so lonely when there's a house full of people around me, i guess i don't know what's about to hit me.
time for some funny.
last night i woke up and i thought d was grabbing my butt. i was thinking, "well what the hell? he has some nerve feeling my butt!" and then i realized it was tiny paws kicking me because ali was laying next to me and i must have scooted into her space. oh ali...kicking mumma's butt at two in the morning! silly cat!
ciao for now,
tinyfay
so i think i'm going to quit my job and find another one. looking back i think i told myself i was just going to get the store up and running on their credit cards and then take off. i did a good job, then i let it all go to hell in november/december. im not sure why, no i DO know why, because no one else cared about it so i quit caring about it too. its hard to motivate a whole team when your other two managers don't give a shit and don't back you up. anyway, my new boss told me my focal compensation will be a whopping 2% when all my 30/60/90/120 reviews were above expectations. above expectations = 5%. recession my ass. they can take their 2% and shove it, really. gap never gave me 2% and they are in serious financial dire straights. if they can't let me work 4 tens so i can work at micheals more, or guarantee me 4 hours a week of premium time, or give me another 2 weeks of vacation so i can work full time at micheals, then i'm out. out like a trout.
we have this huge long list of stuff we need to buy for d and his new place. dvd player. dishes. toaster. microwave. bathmat. towels. pencil cup. it's like he's getting parting gifts on a gameshow. my mom and his mom are in on it but i don't have any disposable income these days so i'm not sure what my donation is going to be. probably the broken microwave in the basement. sigh.
i'm fat. i gained back all the weight i lost in december. the pants that have been falling off me are now a bit snug. i think when d moves out i'll probably go into the not eating mode again, because i'm sure i'll think that it's the only thing i can control, since i obviously won't be able to control him anymore. not that i'm controling per se, but i won't have that little piece of personal management. i don't know. it's warming up outside, if i could just quit smoking i could start exercising. what an excuse i know, i need to just get off my fat ass and ride my bike or take millie for more walks.
i miss mark. i think the distance between us is taking it's toll. he's talking about moving back to colorado but i'm not sure it's such a smart decision. if he can transfer with boost it will be good because he'll only have one major change to blame me for in a few years when i go and screw things up and ruin our friendship (talk about self-fullfilling prophecy). i hope if he does decide to move he gets a loft or something downtown so that he's close, but not TOO close. he would be sad i think, if he knew i felt that way. it's like, i want him around all the time but sometimes i just want to be totally alone. boy, that time is coming up faster than i'm prepared for. i freak out because i'm so lonely when there's a house full of people around me, i guess i don't know what's about to hit me.
time for some funny.
last night i woke up and i thought d was grabbing my butt. i was thinking, "well what the hell? he has some nerve feeling my butt!" and then i realized it was tiny paws kicking me because ali was laying next to me and i must have scooted into her space. oh ali...kicking mumma's butt at two in the morning! silly cat!
ciao for now,
tinyfay