an unavoidable emptiness
Feelings like this haven't presented themselves since last year. Suddenly everything seems like it's just as messy as it was before. One must accept the obvious rejection and move on with ones life... but with this acceptation of defeat, I have been left with an emptiness. Is all hope really lost? And if it is, then where does that leave me? Washed out...? I am lost with out my empty expectations and false hopes. They make me who I am. I base my way of living around them. Logic tells me to progress, to move on from here and make changes, but its one thought that keeps me still. Another glimmer of false hope.
It is not too unthinkable that I should want to stay in the light that ignorance has led me in on. It’s the most wonderful thing. It’s impossible to see what’s real in this light, everything seems the same. All the feelings received are a mix of happiness and flutter. But when the light dies down, all you're left with is raw reality, and it comes down on you harder that you would ever imagine.
It is not too unthinkable that I should want to stay in the light that ignorance has led me in on. It’s the most wonderful thing. It’s impossible to see what’s real in this light, everything seems the same. All the feelings received are a mix of happiness and flutter. But when the light dies down, all you're left with is raw reality, and it comes down on you harder that you would ever imagine.