[#62] One Hour Fic Challenge

[tinyangl]

...I don't even know. I wasn't even really in the mood to write, but I fought through it because I haven't been writing recently. ...Which brought about this load of whatever that can't even be called crap because it's that bad.

Cigarette
Pin, PG, 788 words
A/N: Written for the One Hour Fic Challenge with absolutely no porn here. Based on Jin's

Comments

[anamuan]

.....'it's that bad' meaning, one of my favourite things you've written ever? and i morally protest smoking. This is. this is. i can't even figure out how to describe how much i love this. it's got such a beautiful form. there's this kind of nothing conversation and it's like. it's like a background. like music you have to have on. I love the thematic repetition of 'inhale' and 'exhale;' and it's weird, because it's like. on the one hand, the repetition is soothing, because repetition can be, and in this case in particular, it's iconic of the act of smoking--it's supposed to calm you down. But on the other hand, repetition is a device that can be used to build up tension, and it does here. you've given it this edge of desperation (probably because the words repeat, but it's not always jin who's getting that hit) as well, and it's really very compelling.

now that i've overanalyzed the shit out of that. if you tell me you didn't mean to do any of it, i will call you even more of a genious for being to manage all that unconsciously. :D

also, i kind of desperately want this to be more-than-friendship fic. i like the ambiguity, that it's very clearly pin friendship but that i can put my little tinhat on and read my ship in if i want. i think the closeness of the relationship, plus that weird combination of soothing tension means i can read sexual and or romantic tension in too Don't mind me. you know i'm not a die-hard shipper, but. I like my pin, ok.

[anamuan]

jk;fajkl;fajkl;;jklafjl;kaf this comment really makes no sense. i'm sorry.

[tinyangl]

a;slkdfja;lskdfj This comment just makes me beam so hard, nikki. I heart you so much. a;lkfjasl;kfjalsdf I totally think you analyzed it MUCH MORE than I put thought into it, because beyond the repetition and how I wanted to kinda make it airy....I had NONE of that. So you are just amazing for reading into it. a;ldkfasl;dfjalskdjf

HAVE I TOLD YOU LATELY THAT I LOVE YOU~~~

[anamuan]

THEN YOU ARE A GENIUS FOR YOUR ABILITY TO DO BEAUTIFUL THINGS INSTINCTIVELY.

you did a bit ago over chat. i don't mind hearing it again.