It's written like a Kerouac novel. Swirly swirly.
Irak (that's how it is spelled on Tele.. Tele... how do you call it? Telemundo) won against Costa Rica (Doesn't Snow!) 2-nill. Good for them. Too bad they didn't show it on NBC. NBC has the suckiest (word?) coverage of the Olympics. They show only the American hopefuls and the same boring sports. Swimming. Gymnastics (BARF. I'm sick of seeing America's sweethearts ending up on a Wheaties box). Beach volleyball. I wanna see HANDBALL and FENCING and SAILING!!!! And I want to see athletes OTHER than Americans doing it! And I ESPECIALLY don't want to see a heart-wrenching story on some personality whose husband is out fighting overseas. Not that that's a bad thing, but a LOT of women's husbands are overseas!!!! Are we gonna have a tear-jerking story on them, too???? *rolls eyes*
Anyway. My husband was flipping channels when he stopped on that 'Mundo channel to watch soccer. He hates soccer because it's too dramatic. He says that Americans will never get into soccer because American's aren't that wussy. That's true. I played soccer in high school and the army, and it's full of drama queens. Then I discovered RUGBY. MMMM. How I love getting kicked in my bare shin with a cleat. The joy of seeing blood seeping through my sock from my ankle.
Anyway. During the opening ceremonies, the audience cheered for America when we came out and showed off our biceps. The world still likes us. We're not evil. When they start booing... Lordisa, help us. Then Irak (I like that spelling) came out. All thirty-whatever (was is that number? It was small). They got flown in secretly, in the middle of the night, under a highly classified covert operation (How James Bond-y!) by the
*Ta tata TAH!* AMERICANS!!!!! There we go to save the day again. Good for us. The audience cheered for Iraq (American spelling again), too! It's almost like... they're free but not free yet. But sorta free, but let me go on.
As we were watching the game, we saw that one Iraqi missed a pass, and it went out of bounds to become a throw-in. Boy, were we sad. That guy is gonna get electrocuted by Uday Hussein when he gets home to Iraq... No. wait.
UDAY'S FACE GOT BLOWN UP! AMERICANS DID THAT, TOO!!!
Boy, I love being American.
Anyway. My husband was flipping channels when he stopped on that 'Mundo channel to watch soccer. He hates soccer because it's too dramatic. He says that Americans will never get into soccer because American's aren't that wussy. That's true. I played soccer in high school and the army, and it's full of drama queens. Then I discovered RUGBY. MMMM. How I love getting kicked in my bare shin with a cleat. The joy of seeing blood seeping through my sock from my ankle.
Anyway. During the opening ceremonies, the audience cheered for America when we came out and showed off our biceps. The world still likes us. We're not evil. When they start booing... Lordisa, help us. Then Irak (I like that spelling) came out. All thirty-whatever (was is that number? It was small). They got flown in secretly, in the middle of the night, under a highly classified covert operation (How James Bond-y!) by the
*Ta tata TAH!* AMERICANS!!!!! There we go to save the day again. Good for us. The audience cheered for Iraq (American spelling again), too! It's almost like... they're free but not free yet. But sorta free, but let me go on.
As we were watching the game, we saw that one Iraqi missed a pass, and it went out of bounds to become a throw-in. Boy, were we sad. That guy is gonna get electrocuted by Uday Hussein when he gets home to Iraq... No. wait.
UDAY'S FACE GOT BLOWN UP! AMERICANS DID THAT, TOO!!!
Boy, I love being American.