BAD, BAD, BAD
1. Have you played Indiana Jones and the Staff of Kings on the Wii? Have you? I assume you haven't. There is no way you can play Staff of Kings and be so exceedingly silent when Staff of Kings is so exceedingly terrible. It is the worst Indiana Jones game I have ever played. Wow, Staff of Kings is rubbish! The combat system is ENTIRELY MOTION BASED and insensitive to player input and it is FRUSTRATING. You can't hit things! You just THRASH ABOUT MADLY and sometimes Indy pities your epilepsy and takes a swing but mostly he just faces the wrong direction or he drops items or he DIES. It is stupid. It is the WORST. And I hate so much that the game is PREJUDICE AGAINST LEFT-HANDED PEOPLE. The controls are nearly impossible to begin with but then add on that I am dominantly left-handed while Indy is dominantly right-handed so everything I make him do on screen appears completely backward and defiant. Ohhh, bad, BAD, BAD. I am so over Staff of Kings. LucasArts should be ashamed.
2. I watched the Sci-Fi original movie, Star Runners. I like the bit where JKL pulls out the heavy artillery and starts blasting things and I like that he doesn't even pretend not to be Ando in Space. "Sidekick?" OH, BEST. I love Ando so much. But the main thing I want to say about Star Runners is that Star Runners is bad. Clearly "bad" is this post's theme. Star Runners is the worst idea that humanity has ever conceived. It is worse than Staff of Kings! That is how bad it is.
OH GOD.
HOW BAD WAS STAR RUNNERS?
It didn't even feel like I was watching a movie. It was more like watching actors say words on set and then watching them say words on another set and then ANOTHER SET and blah blah blah more words came out and then there were aliens. The minute the shuttle crashed on the backwater planet with the humongous decapitating bugs, I wanted everyone to get all headless so the movie could stop prematurely and I could stop being so completely bored. WHATEVER WAS EVEN HAPPENING IN TERMS OF PLOT AND CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT? Beside the fact that the characters were running from Evil British Military People, I am not convinced the script had much of either. I quite like that at least Ando had the good sense to notice the lack of substance and that he BLEW HIMSELF UP within a few minutes of crashlanding to be rid of it all. His death was the most liberating thing that could have happened. I was really quite glad. And then I turned off the television and I was beyond delighted. Oh, I love when Ando makes me happy. It is just the best. But the movie was still terrible. I couldn't even bring myself to watch the end of it so I know in my heart that this is so. Oh God.
How was your weekend?
2. I watched the Sci-Fi original movie, Star Runners. I like the bit where JKL pulls out the heavy artillery and starts blasting things and I like that he doesn't even pretend not to be Ando in Space. "Sidekick?" OH, BEST. I love Ando so much. But the main thing I want to say about Star Runners is that Star Runners is bad. Clearly "bad" is this post's theme. Star Runners is the worst idea that humanity has ever conceived. It is worse than Staff of Kings! That is how bad it is.
OH GOD.
HOW BAD WAS STAR RUNNERS?
It didn't even feel like I was watching a movie. It was more like watching actors say words on set and then watching them say words on another set and then ANOTHER SET and blah blah blah more words came out and then there were aliens. The minute the shuttle crashed on the backwater planet with the humongous decapitating bugs, I wanted everyone to get all headless so the movie could stop prematurely and I could stop being so completely bored. WHATEVER WAS EVEN HAPPENING IN TERMS OF PLOT AND CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT? Beside the fact that the characters were running from Evil British Military People, I am not convinced the script had much of either. I quite like that at least Ando had the good sense to notice the lack of substance and that he BLEW HIMSELF UP within a few minutes of crashlanding to be rid of it all. His death was the most liberating thing that could have happened. I was really quite glad. And then I turned off the television and I was beyond delighted. Oh, I love when Ando makes me happy. It is just the best. But the movie was still terrible. I couldn't even bring myself to watch the end of it so I know in my heart that this is so. Oh God.
How was your weekend?