Jun 04, 2012 08:44
There's been a change somehow. I don't know what happened, I don't know how it happened, but it's been going on for quite some time now. I've been shut out. I have been pushed back. I've tried to reverse it. I have tried to make it right somehow, whatever it was I had done.
But it's no use.
I give up. I am retreating. I am licking my wounds in the deafening silence, and I am no long going to try.
I've known it for a while. I just didn't want to accept it. I didn't want to even conceive of it. I probably just made things worse in my attempts to retrieve that I had obviously lost. This may make everything, everything change. The total end of an era.
And I have no idea how to begin, what to begin with. Where. I feel adrift. Disconnected. And pretty much abandoned. I've tried too hard. I've made things worse.
I have been a fool.
end of an era,
alone