(no subject)
My mother’s mother will turn 96 in a couple of weeks. When she was my age, in the early 1940s, she wrote her dissertation in history at Lunds universitet. It delights her to this day that she finished and defended her thesis before her future husband. They both got their doctorates the same year, but she finished first by four months. When I was in my early teens both of my maternal grandparents were honored by the university on the 50th anniversary of being conferred their doctoral degrees. One of my favorite pictures of them together was taken at that ceremony.
With my mother’s mother in the picture-and my parents too-I grew up taking gender equality for granted. My maternal grandparents were clearly a match for each other, in intellect, culture, and drive. It took me quite a while to realize that not all grandmothers debated foreign affairs and quoted something they had read in ancient Greek just as easily as in German or French at the dinner table. It was clear to me from a very young age that women were quite powerful, especially if they hungered after learning, worked hard, knew their worth and cut the bullsh*t. And the grace with which my mother’s mother did all these things, while at the same time having incredible style, culture and (amazing!) culinary skills-well, it set the bar for excellence pretty high. While I was growing up my mother’s mother wasn’t soft, cuddly or maternal, but she was always elegant, informed and interesting to be around. You might say she set an example.
Yesterday while my mom and I were walking around Stockholm we started talking about the Swedish doctoral traditions. When my grandparents were conferred their doctorates in Lund, each also received inscribed doctoral rings. At Stockholms universitet, on the other hand, only recipients of honorary doctorates are given rings. Secretly, I’ve always wanted to earn a doctoral ring. When my cousin defended his thesis and got his doctorate this past Spring, he received my maternal grandfather’s doctoral ring. My mother’s mother still has her’s. Yesterday while we were out walking my mom told me that her mother has been saving the ring with me in mind; that when I get my doctorate my mother’s mother wants to give me her ring.
I almost started crying right there on the street. I know my maternal grandmother loves me, but I guess I never really thought she might see me as someone following in her footsteps in any way. I hadn’t really thought about how proud of me she might be for doing what I’m doing (more so once I accomplish my goal, of course). It means a lot. Especially after this Fall, it means a lot. There are a lot of reasons for me to finish my dissertation and get my doctorate, and I have plenty of internal motivation to do so. But knowing my maternal grandmother would be proud of me, and the idea that at least in my own way I was reaching toward the bar she set so high, that’s a reason to finish too. I hope she lives to see it.
With my mother’s mother in the picture-and my parents too-I grew up taking gender equality for granted. My maternal grandparents were clearly a match for each other, in intellect, culture, and drive. It took me quite a while to realize that not all grandmothers debated foreign affairs and quoted something they had read in ancient Greek just as easily as in German or French at the dinner table. It was clear to me from a very young age that women were quite powerful, especially if they hungered after learning, worked hard, knew their worth and cut the bullsh*t. And the grace with which my mother’s mother did all these things, while at the same time having incredible style, culture and (amazing!) culinary skills-well, it set the bar for excellence pretty high. While I was growing up my mother’s mother wasn’t soft, cuddly or maternal, but she was always elegant, informed and interesting to be around. You might say she set an example.
Yesterday while my mom and I were walking around Stockholm we started talking about the Swedish doctoral traditions. When my grandparents were conferred their doctorates in Lund, each also received inscribed doctoral rings. At Stockholms universitet, on the other hand, only recipients of honorary doctorates are given rings. Secretly, I’ve always wanted to earn a doctoral ring. When my cousin defended his thesis and got his doctorate this past Spring, he received my maternal grandfather’s doctoral ring. My mother’s mother still has her’s. Yesterday while we were out walking my mom told me that her mother has been saving the ring with me in mind; that when I get my doctorate my mother’s mother wants to give me her ring.
I almost started crying right there on the street. I know my maternal grandmother loves me, but I guess I never really thought she might see me as someone following in her footsteps in any way. I hadn’t really thought about how proud of me she might be for doing what I’m doing (more so once I accomplish my goal, of course). It means a lot. Especially after this Fall, it means a lot. There are a lot of reasons for me to finish my dissertation and get my doctorate, and I have plenty of internal motivation to do so. But knowing my maternal grandmother would be proud of me, and the idea that at least in my own way I was reaching toward the bar she set so high, that’s a reason to finish too. I hope she lives to see it.