man
alright, so its 12:30ish.....and I dont have to be back at school until 2. its nice that i have a 4 hour break, but at the same time, its killing me. im fine when im out doing things, but when i come home, i feel like im stuck. i just need to get out of this rut - and hopefully that will be soon...well, my dad said he'd pay for my plane ticket to Arizona. im excited. im going to lukoses after work tonite to schedule our trip - yay! im really excited about it, but at the same time, it makes me nervous. if i do go out there, im gonna be ALL BY MYSELF.
when im out doing things, im totally fine - just being myself. but when im home, it kills me.
im guess im still upset w/ chris - but i think im doing an ok job getting over it....loosing my boyfriend....and worst of all, my friend. it aggravates me to know that he just gives up. I guess its better for me that way, but still. Im glad my friends are here to help me. ya know - my real friends.
all i want to do is cry - but it wont come out. i wish it did.
"I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time.
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight, it's only you and me." - 3 doors down.
and i read this - and i get angry with myself - why do i still think of him? he's not thinking of me ...
i dont know why i listen to these kind of songs. now im angry. really angry. im going outside to smoke.
when im out doing things, im totally fine - just being myself. but when im home, it kills me.
im guess im still upset w/ chris - but i think im doing an ok job getting over it....loosing my boyfriend....and worst of all, my friend. it aggravates me to know that he just gives up. I guess its better for me that way, but still. Im glad my friends are here to help me. ya know - my real friends.
all i want to do is cry - but it wont come out. i wish it did.
"I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time.
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight, it's only you and me." - 3 doors down.
and i read this - and i get angry with myself - why do i still think of him? he's not thinking of me ...
i dont know why i listen to these kind of songs. now im angry. really angry. im going outside to smoke.