she woke with a start...
I have a story in my head, and it's been tormenting me to distraction.
I'd write it, but I don't have all of it yet. And it's a HUGE story. HUGE. I mean, wow. Atleast in my head it is.
I started to dream it a few nights ago, and now it's there for atleast a little bit every night and it's fast becoming an obsession in my daydreams and meandering thoughts.
But I don't know how it starts, or how to tie in several of the other things. I know they go together, I just don't know how.
It's like listening to a Book on CD when the player is on random.
and I wish I was better at drawing, atleast. There are some gorgeous scenes in there, truly iconic. I'll see what I can do, but I feel that this is a project that will take YEARS to do.
and I feel really inspired to do it... who knows, maybe they'll make a movie and I'll become rich, haha.
in other news, I have a haircut and I will be a summer widow in three weeks. Not looking forward to it, but we'll see what happens.
though I am getting frustrated with how long his schooling is going to take. I want to go to grad school and get my masters. I also want to start/stop having kids by a certain age and the potential extra year is starting to mess with everything and I hate the fact that he can't pin down WHEN this will be done. I need to know so I can do things like fine tune my savings plans and what not to pay back my undergrad loan and pay for grad school and worry about GREs and the like...
and I want to have kid no.1 by 26. I will be done by age 35, for my health/sanity as well as that of our kids since birth defects DOUBLE EACH year after that. And there are quite a few in my genetic make-up. Heck, I was born with one.
but back to the mini rant:
I want the kids to be three years apart. That way they'll be quasi-able to talk, they'll be potty trained, will understand "no" and the like. On this schedual it'll take 6 years to have 3 kids. Ty wants more than 3, which I am willing to listen to ("but it's your body" "yeah, but it's his family too, his sperm and he's pretty invested as well... he just doesn't have to be preggers") but we'll see.
and I don't want to be in school when I have kids and I don't want to part-time it and have kids and take years to get my masters if I'm able to finish at all.
but thats not something I can control at this point in time. And I might have to do the part time with a baby thing. Sigh.
and now for dinner. Yay.
I'd write it, but I don't have all of it yet. And it's a HUGE story. HUGE. I mean, wow. Atleast in my head it is.
I started to dream it a few nights ago, and now it's there for atleast a little bit every night and it's fast becoming an obsession in my daydreams and meandering thoughts.
But I don't know how it starts, or how to tie in several of the other things. I know they go together, I just don't know how.
It's like listening to a Book on CD when the player is on random.
and I wish I was better at drawing, atleast. There are some gorgeous scenes in there, truly iconic. I'll see what I can do, but I feel that this is a project that will take YEARS to do.
and I feel really inspired to do it... who knows, maybe they'll make a movie and I'll become rich, haha.
in other news, I have a haircut and I will be a summer widow in three weeks. Not looking forward to it, but we'll see what happens.
though I am getting frustrated with how long his schooling is going to take. I want to go to grad school and get my masters. I also want to start/stop having kids by a certain age and the potential extra year is starting to mess with everything and I hate the fact that he can't pin down WHEN this will be done. I need to know so I can do things like fine tune my savings plans and what not to pay back my undergrad loan and pay for grad school and worry about GREs and the like...
and I want to have kid no.1 by 26. I will be done by age 35, for my health/sanity as well as that of our kids since birth defects DOUBLE EACH year after that. And there are quite a few in my genetic make-up. Heck, I was born with one.
but back to the mini rant:
I want the kids to be three years apart. That way they'll be quasi-able to talk, they'll be potty trained, will understand "no" and the like. On this schedual it'll take 6 years to have 3 kids. Ty wants more than 3, which I am willing to listen to ("but it's your body" "yeah, but it's his family too, his sperm and he's pretty invested as well... he just doesn't have to be preggers") but we'll see.
and I don't want to be in school when I have kids and I don't want to part-time it and have kids and take years to get my masters if I'm able to finish at all.
but thats not something I can control at this point in time. And I might have to do the part time with a baby thing. Sigh.
and now for dinner. Yay.