The Incredibly Low Expectations of Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki
Title: The Incredibly Low Expectations of Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki
Characters: Jensen, Jared
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 4,049
Warnings: Spoilers for 2.04, 2.17, 2.22, and 3.16.
Disclaimer: Actually, some of this really happened. But not all of it. I was inspired by events that happened IRL! :)
Synopsis: Jensen and Jared don't expect things to turn out the way they do.
Notes: Yeah, I took a bunch of crap that happened IRL and wrote about it, because it makes me feel all warm and squishy inside. For "The Play," I know I found some of Jared's quotes and the info in someone's LJ, I just don't remember where, now. I live online, and I forget these things. Feel free to poke me for credit!
The Audition
Jensen doesn’t really expect to get what he wants. He expects to get what he can. So, even if he’s partial to Dean, he’s practically been handed Sam on a silver platter. Either way, it’s a good job. It’s better than what he has. It’s pretty much his own show. Well, his and Sam’s, whoever Sam may be.
He doesn’t expect to get the call, either, and his heart sinks. Of course, he immediately starts telling himself that it’s no big deal. He still has Smallville, and he can still audition for other roles. It’s not like this is the be all and end all of his career. It makes him feel stupidly arrogant when he’s surprised that he doesn’t get the role of Sam. Sure, people at the network like him, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to get every single role he auditions for. He should’ve learned that the last time this happened, on Smallville, ironically. He needs to be more realistic than that in this business. He needs to keep his head about him and remember where his place is.
He certainly doesn’t expect the call to take the turn that it does. Everyone had seemed so thrilled about his Sam that he doesn’t even think that they’d consider him as Dean, regardless of his own preferences. His heartbeat picks up again, and he agrees to the audition, trying not to sound as desperately enthusiastic as he feels inside.
He hangs up grinning, excited and relieved by the sudden turn of events. But his grin subsides, and he can’t help but feel a little bit curious about the guy they want for Sam. He’s not jealous or threatened. Hell, he practically wants to hug the guy already for giving him the chance to audition for Dean. He’s just curious. Who the hell was this guy, and why had they never met before?
****
Jared doesn’t expect to get to the audition early and find that he’s the only one there. He doesn’t expect to find out that the only other person coming is the guy they’re looking at for Dean. And he certainly doesn’t expect that person to be Jensen Ackles.
He’s never met the guy, as strange as that might seem. They’ve both been working at the same network. He doesn’t know much about him, except for what he’s heard, and from what he’s heard? Well, he’s kind of dubbed Jensen Ackles “The WB’s Golden Boy” in his head. The guy’s had some time on a few different shows, and the network can’t seem to let him go.
He’s early, so he sits down and does the first thing he can think of. He calls Sandy. He calls Sandy and freaks the fuck out, because he’s the only person there to go up against Jensen Ackles. It relaxes him a little bit when Sandy laughs at him, tells him the fact that he’s the only person there for Sam is good news, because that must mean he’s already blown the other Sam competitors away. But he still argues with her out of nervous habit, tells her she just doesn’t understand, because this is Jensen Ackles, and, even if they did enjoy his audition for Sam, once he reads with Jensen, they’ll probably think he isn’t good enough.
If he’s honest with himself, he’s a little bit reluctant to take this job, anyway. Only a little bit. It’s not that he doesn’t want it. He does. It sounds awesome. It’s just that he’s gotten comfortable with his life as it is, and he’s pretty sure that this just might change everything. It’s practically his own show. Well, his and Dean’s show, whoever Dean may be. But who is he kidding? Dean’s going to be Jensen Ackles.
****
Jensen doesn’t expect to get to the audition and find only Jared there, and, for a moment, it throws him off so much that he forgets his manners.
“Am I really that early?” he blurts out, not even introducing himself to the guy he’d researched online the night before.
“Oh, um, no,” Jared says, and stands. He stands, and Jensen almost takes a step back. He remembers reading that Jared was tall, but actually having the guy unfold in front of him is kind of unsettling. Jared stretches a hand out towards him and smiles. “I’m Jared. Jared Padalecki.”
“Jensen Ackles,” Jensen says, returning the smile and shaking the guy’s hand. It’s a bit sweaty and shaky, and Jensen lets his smile widen a little, loosening his own posture when he realizes just how nervous Jared is. “So, you’re Sam, huh?”
“Well, uh,” Jared flushes a little and shrugs, smile still playing on his lips, “Hopefully, I guess.”
Jensen takes a seat and slouches, looking up at Jared expectantly, and Jared visibly relaxes and follows suit.
****
Jared doesn’t know what he expected from Jensen, but he’s pretty sure it wasn’t this. He wasn’t expecting Jensen to come in and put him at ease. He knows that isn’t fair, but it’s not as if he was making assumptions about Jensen’s character. He tries his best not to do that with anybody. He worked and got along with Paris Hilton, for God’s sake. He tries to give everybody a clean slate, find the good in all of them and focus on that. It’s not that he expected Jensen to walk in and be a complete douche bag. It’s that he somehow expected Jensen to come in and immediately start acting him out of the place, whether the audition had started or not.
“Nah, you got it,” Jensen tells him, waving a hand in the air dismissively, and Jared can’t help but cock his head curiously.
“What makes you say that?”
“You’re the only one left,” Jensen says simply, shrugging. “They saw a lot of people for Sam. Pretty much everybody walked through those doors and read those lines.” Jensen grins. “I did.”
“Y-You…??” Jensen chuckles a little, and Jared’s pretty sure his eyes just bulged straight out of their sockets. He clears his throat and collects himself, figuring that was a less than stellar reaction. But Jensen doesn’t seem to mind. “So, it’s us then?” he says slowly. “I’m Sam and you’re Dean?”
“Ah,” Jensen says hesitantly, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck and ducking his head shyly, “Hopefully? They haven’t been searching for Dean the way they have for Sam. Not yet, anyway. I guess it depends on how this goes.”
“Well,” Jared fidgets a little and smiles back at Jensen, who looks at him curiously, “Let’s kick some ass, then.”
The Brawl
Jensen didn’t expect to have such a strong brotherly chemistry with Jared right off the bat. From the look that had been on Jared’s face, neither of them had expected the standing ovation they got after they read together. He doesn’t expect that chemistry to cross over into real life, him and Jared bonding in no time. He’s never had that happen before. But they have a lot in common, and it’s easy with Jared.
“That’s the guy!”
He certainly doesn’t expect a group of drunken assholes outside of a bar to start randomly taking swings at him after some chick in Vancouver recognizes him from the show. He’s suddenly really thankful to have had all the fight training he’s had, both from Dark Angel and from Supernatural. It’s coming in handy right about now.
But he knows what his objective is among a group of guys this big. It’s to fight to defend himself and then get away. He catches a break pretty early, surprised to have an out so soon and with so little damage done. He breaks away and chances a glance back, only to see Jared fighting, too, and his heart drops for a minute.
They’re teaming up on him. Jared’s got a group of guys around him throwing punches. They’re teaming up on him, and Jensen feels anger flare up hot inside of him. Fucking dickless sons of bitches…
****
Jared doesn’t expect to end up in a brawl, and he certainly doesn’t expect to lose. Except that’s what seems to be happening. There are just too many of them, and he’s lost sight of Jensen, but he prides himself on the injuries he’s still managed to inflict. He throws another punch, and he’s not quite sure what happens, doesn’t even really see it in the mess that he’s in, but he feels something crack, and he cries out in pain. Fuck, his hand hurts.
He forgets the pain when the absolute last thing he ever expected to see happens in a matter of seconds. All of a sudden, Jensen’s there. But Jensen isn’t just there. He’s there, fucking fly-kicking some asshole and punching another. Jensen’s beating his way through the crowd, and all Jared can do is stare, wide-eyed, until Jensen grabs his shirt and pulls.
“Let’s get the hell outta here!” Jensen shouts, and when Jensen pulls ahead, Jared follows robotically, hearing himself make a small sound of disappointment when his shirt rips. It’s not like the shirt even fucking matters, but Jared’s a little stunned at the moment.
They stop mid-run when the cops show up and grab the idiots that had attacked them. Jared curses silently to himself, but knows they did nothing wrong. They’ll probably have to tell their side of the story, but he can see some of the passersby telling it to the cops already.
“Are you okay?” Jordan asks, and shit, Jared just about forgot his friend was even there. He feels bad, and almost apologizes for it, except Jordan wouldn’t know what the hell he was apologizing for, and what Jordan didn’t know couldn’t hurt him.
“Yeah…” Jared barely even responds before Jensen’s reaching for his hand, brows drawn together in concern. Jared hadn’t even realized he’d been cupping his injured hand in the other, and he just stares dumbly when Jensen takes the broken hand in both of his own.
“Jared, you hurt?” Jensen asks, inspecting the hand, and Jared just shrugs. He watches, almost in fascination, as Jensen checks his hand over. The same two hands that had just bludgeoned a group of guys to shit are handling his broken one so gently that Jared thinks Jensen must be a walking fucking paradox.
Both of them look over towards the crowd when they hear the cops mention an ambulance. Jared sees a couple of guys on the ground groaning in pain, and looks over in wonder at Jensen, who grins back at him.
“We really fucked their shit up,” Jensen says proudly, and Jared almost asks him who the hell ‘we’ is, because he’s pretty sure those guys’ shits were thoroughly fucked up by Jensen, and Jensen alone. Jensen looks back down at Jared’s hand, still cradled in the Fists of Death. “Let’s get you checked out.”
The Scene
Jensen doesn’t expect his character to be so fucking emotional, but this second season is shaping up to be a doozy. Dean’s so fucked up. He’s crying again, just one more take for Kim. He can do it. He can, and he does, and when Kim calls it, he pushes off of the Impala and just starts walking. He’s put himself in a bad place to get to Dean’s pain. It’s not that he hasn’t done emotional scenes before, but Dean’s emotions just run so deep.
He doesn’t know where he’s going, just hopes the consistent motion of his steps will somehow help him walk it off and stop the tears he’s suddenly found a well of. He doesn’t expect Jared to follow him. He doesn’t expect Jared’s arm to wrap gently around his shoulders, staying there and moving with him as he walks. He doesn’t expect Jared to say anything to make him feel better, anything at all.
“Great scene, man,” Jared says quietly, and Jensen just sniffles, takes a deep breath, and stops walking. Jared stops with him, his arm still draped around Jensen’s shoulders, staying there through all the little hitches Jensen breathes through. No costar has ever done anything like this for him before.
Jensen feels himself calming down, his brain finally catching up with the fact that he was just acting. He reaches up and wipes his face with one hand, and slowly turns his head to look up at Jared, offering him a watery smile.
“Thanks.”
The Tear
Jared gets it now. He understands where Jensen’s head was at back when they shot that scene on the front of the Impala. He’s going there now, sitting alone on the set, concentrating on his pain, rocking back and forth with it. He hates it. It’s like fucking torture, but he needs it for this scene. He pictures his dogs, both of them, looking up at him in pain, some sympathetic animal doctor telling him that he has to do what’s best for both of them. He sees them lying there, sees them close their eyes, and he chokes on the image.
He gets up to do one take, and he feels tears wetting his cheeks in a flood. He can see the questioning concern in Jensen’s eyes when Dean melts away after Kim’s called cut, and he moves away. But Jensen’s there, on him quick.
“Jared, what the hell are you doing to yourself, man?” Jensen asks, damn near whispers, and Jared can’t keep a few more tears from escaping when he tells Jensen what his technique for this scene is.
He doesn’t expect Jensen to look almost as stricken as he feels when he tells him about the dogs. He doesn’t expect his own emotions to fuel Jensen’s. He certainly doesn’t expect to watch the scene over, only to see Jensen crying with him, for him, one single tear slipping down his cheek.
“Thanks for stealing my scene, asshole,” Jared says, finally smiling and shoving at Jensen, trying to make light of the situation. Jensen chuckles, but then gives him a look, and Jared feels something in his chest, rests his hand on Jensen’s back for a bit before pulling it away. “Thanks,” he says, barely audible enough for him to even hear himself say it. Jensen nods.
The Fight
Jensen doesn’t expect Jared to snap. Jared never snaps. Well, not at him, anyway. But Jared’s suddenly stepping up to him, and just the fact that he does it at all pisses Jensen off like nothing ever has before. He mimics the move, knows he’s mocking Jared with his expression, and sees Jared bristle in response.
Jared’s in his face now, trying to intimidate him, make him back down, and fuck that shit. Jensen’s never been so tense in his life, returning the favor and getting in the face of his costar, his best friend, both of them fuming with anger. He’s dimly aware of everyone on the crew gasping in shock.
With the look on Jared’s face, he expects Jared to hit him. He can feel it coming, feels it in the air. Except it never does. Something flickers in Jared’s eyes, and then Jared’s turning and walking away, stomping off to his trailer and slamming the door behind him.
Jensen has no idea what to do, his fists clenching and unclenching. He feels heat burning in his face, and feels incredibly stupid now, just standing there fuming with no one to fume at and everyone on set watching him. So, as he had throughout the fight, he mimics Jared, stalking off to his trailer and slamming the door, hoping that Jared hears it, too.
Jensen’s pretty sure it’s been a couple of hours, and in those hours, he hasn’t just brooded silently. He’s called people, people who have told him to get his head out of his ass and be a man. People who remind him just how tiring and stressful his job is. People who remind him that he’s exhausted, and that Jared’s just as exhausted as he is.
He stands up with a sigh and runs his hand through his hair. He really is tired. Stressed. He knows Jared’s no different. He knows that’s why this happened in the first place, and it’s so fucking stupid that he can barely stand it.
He knows he’s still irritable, but that he isn’t directing that at Jared anymore, and he opens his door and walks over to Jared’s trailer, right next to his. He knocks, expects to have to skirt Jared’s anger, explain himself, and start right off with an apology. He doesn’t expect to be engulfed in a hug as soon as the door opens and he’s stepped inside, Jared beating him to the apology before he can even blink.
“I’m sorry,” Jared mutters, and Jensen mimics Jared’s movements once again, wrapping his arms around him and returning the hug. “I’m sorry. I’m just so fucking tired.”
“I know,” Jensen says. “I’m sorry, too.”
The Thought
Jared doesn’t expect playing dead to be so hard. But here he is, lying on a mattress with his eyes closed. He doesn’t have to do anything else. It’s that simple. He’s dead.
No. Sam’s dead. Jared’s listening. Jared’s listening and trying to hold his breath. Which is hard when your breath wants to hitch in quiet sobs. He’s supposed to be dead, and he can feel himself starting to tear up behind his eyelids. Jensen is so wrecked and broken. He’s kicking the shit out of this scene. But Jared can’t wait until it’s over, and knows Jensen has to feel the same way.
He stays still between takes, as much as he wants to open his eyes and stretch. He’s almost afraid of ruining things, breaking the spell, the mood that’s hanging over all of them, and he can’t do that. Jensen’s worked so hard, and he owes it to Jensen to just stay there. Dead.
Kim finally calls it, and Jared opens his eyes and rubs at them before he looks for Jensen. Jensen’s standing above him, tears still rolling down his face, and Jared mutely raises a hand up towards him. Jensen grabs it reflexively, helps to pull him up. Someone else grabs Jensen’s attention, tells him people are there to interview him, and Jared’s almost shaking his head before Jensen is.
“I-I can’t,” Jensen stammers, running a trembling hand over his face. “I can’t. Not right now. I’m sorry. If they can wait…?”
They understand. They’d fucking have to understand, as far as Jared’s concerned. He wordlessly grabs Jensen and pulls him off set, sneaks them both away to his trailer, and sits Jensen down on the couch, drained.
“Jesus, Jensen. The dogs, your mother, what?” Jared asks, and Jensen knows what he’s asking, even though there wasn’t even a trace of a full sentence in there. Jensen always knows. But, as close as they are now, Jared doesn’t expect the answer Jensen gives him.
“No,” Jensen says tiredly, shaking his head, a brief smile flashing across his face so quickly Jared’s not even sure if it was ever really there. Jensen hesitates, swallows, and flicks his eyes up at Jared. “You.”
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen’s voice to crack when he says it, doesn’t expect Jensen to curse and swipe at fresh tears. He feels a bit of a lump grow in his own throat and sits down next to Jensen, pulling him into a hug, not expecting Jensen’s desperate grip on the back of his shirt.
“You.”
The Play
Jensen doesn’t expect many people besides his family and his girlfriend to come see him in the play in Dallas. It’s not a big deal, and everyone’s busy with their own shit. He doesn’t expect his phone to ring during intermission on the second night. He doesn’t expect the person on the other end to be Jared, who’s supposed to be in Vancouver filming his movie. He certainly doesn’t expect Jared to start the phone call off by telling him he’s kicking ass.
What?” Jensen says, completely stunned. “You’re here??”
“I wanted to surprise you!”
Jensen can’t help it. He’s grinning, ear to ear, his nerves dissipating, taken over by the happiness blooming in his chest.
“Man,” he says, knowing Jared can hear the smile in his voice, “You didn’t have to come all the way out here. Thank you.”
“Of course! I wanted to be here to see you!”
Jensen stays on the phone for a few minutes, brushing off Jared’s many compliments, but still drinking them in. It’s not the first time that he’s counting himself lucky to have Jared as a friend, and yet it surprises him every time. He looks for Jared when it’s over, sees his friend get up to lead a fucking standing ovation, and can’t wait to see him once he gets backstage.
The Death
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen to do the same thing he’d done when he’d died at the end of last season. Jared was lying on a mattress with his eyes closed, dry. Jensen’s lying on a hard floor, eyes open, fake blood all over his body. They’re not even on Jensen’s coverage anymore, and Jensen’s keeping it up, trying to give Jared the proper visual. It’s harder than Jared thought to go from feeling murderous to breaking down in a matter of seconds. Still, Jensen’s got to be sick of this by now. Especially after working his way through Dean’s violent death.
“You don’t have to do that, man,” Jared says softly, looking down at him, and Jensen just barely blinks, just barely moves his mouth, in an effort to stay in the exact same position he’s been in already. Dead.
“S’okay. Do it.”
He goes to kill Lilith, who flees Ruby’s body. He turns and sees Dean’s body, dropping the knife. His chest heaves, and his eyes fill with tears at the sight before him. It isn’t hard, now. It isn’t hard for the emotions to come when Dean is Jensen, torn apart and bloody, eyes open and lifeless, chest still. He reaches his hands around and under Jensen’s body, lifting him in his arms. He cries. He cries, with barely enough strength to splutter out Dean’s name.
There’s a sickening moment where he thinks he’s done, but Jensen still hasn’t moved, hasn’t blinked yet. Then Kim finally calls it, and Jensen’s blinking and looking, really looking, up at him. They help each other get to their feet and Jared hugs him, choking out one word that he knows Jensen will remember.
“You.”
The House
Jensen doesn’t expect Jared to ask him to move in with him. He figures Jared sees enough of him as it is. But Jared’s downright insistent about it. So, Jensen agrees to at least store his stuff at Jared’s house while he looks for a place. He doesn’t expect to end up there for good.
Except he never has any real time to look for another place. In the end, it’s Jared who convinces him to upgrade himself from an air mattress to a real bed and just fucking live there, dammit.
He doesn’t expect it to be as nice as it is, to work as well as it does. He doesn’t expect it to feel like family, like home. But it does.
****
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen to relax about this. He keeps telling him that it’s his house, too. But Jensen’s still acting like a guest, like a burden. It would piss Jared off, if he didn’t find it just a little endearing.
He doesn’t expect to come home to find Jensen anywhere but in his own room or on the couch, watching TV, constantly asking Jared’s permission to do anything else. He doesn’t expect to come home and find Jensen crashed out on the floor with Sadie, his head resting on her body, dog toys strewn around them. Harley? Harley greets him at the door, jumping up at him. But Sadie just lifts her head, looks up at him, looks at Jensen lying on her side, and then flops back down, unwilling to disturb her new playmate.
“Traitor,” he whispers, grinning, with his heart ready to burst. Her tail flops. Once.
He doesn’t expect his family to grow when he meets Jensen Ackles. But it does.
Characters: Jensen, Jared
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 4,049
Warnings: Spoilers for 2.04, 2.17, 2.22, and 3.16.
Disclaimer: Actually, some of this really happened. But not all of it. I was inspired by events that happened IRL! :)
Synopsis: Jensen and Jared don't expect things to turn out the way they do.
Notes: Yeah, I took a bunch of crap that happened IRL and wrote about it, because it makes me feel all warm and squishy inside. For "The Play," I know I found some of Jared's quotes and the info in someone's LJ, I just don't remember where, now. I live online, and I forget these things. Feel free to poke me for credit!
The Audition
Jensen doesn’t really expect to get what he wants. He expects to get what he can. So, even if he’s partial to Dean, he’s practically been handed Sam on a silver platter. Either way, it’s a good job. It’s better than what he has. It’s pretty much his own show. Well, his and Sam’s, whoever Sam may be.
He doesn’t expect to get the call, either, and his heart sinks. Of course, he immediately starts telling himself that it’s no big deal. He still has Smallville, and he can still audition for other roles. It’s not like this is the be all and end all of his career. It makes him feel stupidly arrogant when he’s surprised that he doesn’t get the role of Sam. Sure, people at the network like him, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to get every single role he auditions for. He should’ve learned that the last time this happened, on Smallville, ironically. He needs to be more realistic than that in this business. He needs to keep his head about him and remember where his place is.
He certainly doesn’t expect the call to take the turn that it does. Everyone had seemed so thrilled about his Sam that he doesn’t even think that they’d consider him as Dean, regardless of his own preferences. His heartbeat picks up again, and he agrees to the audition, trying not to sound as desperately enthusiastic as he feels inside.
He hangs up grinning, excited and relieved by the sudden turn of events. But his grin subsides, and he can’t help but feel a little bit curious about the guy they want for Sam. He’s not jealous or threatened. Hell, he practically wants to hug the guy already for giving him the chance to audition for Dean. He’s just curious. Who the hell was this guy, and why had they never met before?
****
Jared doesn’t expect to get to the audition early and find that he’s the only one there. He doesn’t expect to find out that the only other person coming is the guy they’re looking at for Dean. And he certainly doesn’t expect that person to be Jensen Ackles.
He’s never met the guy, as strange as that might seem. They’ve both been working at the same network. He doesn’t know much about him, except for what he’s heard, and from what he’s heard? Well, he’s kind of dubbed Jensen Ackles “The WB’s Golden Boy” in his head. The guy’s had some time on a few different shows, and the network can’t seem to let him go.
He’s early, so he sits down and does the first thing he can think of. He calls Sandy. He calls Sandy and freaks the fuck out, because he’s the only person there to go up against Jensen Ackles. It relaxes him a little bit when Sandy laughs at him, tells him the fact that he’s the only person there for Sam is good news, because that must mean he’s already blown the other Sam competitors away. But he still argues with her out of nervous habit, tells her she just doesn’t understand, because this is Jensen Ackles, and, even if they did enjoy his audition for Sam, once he reads with Jensen, they’ll probably think he isn’t good enough.
If he’s honest with himself, he’s a little bit reluctant to take this job, anyway. Only a little bit. It’s not that he doesn’t want it. He does. It sounds awesome. It’s just that he’s gotten comfortable with his life as it is, and he’s pretty sure that this just might change everything. It’s practically his own show. Well, his and Dean’s show, whoever Dean may be. But who is he kidding? Dean’s going to be Jensen Ackles.
****
Jensen doesn’t expect to get to the audition and find only Jared there, and, for a moment, it throws him off so much that he forgets his manners.
“Am I really that early?” he blurts out, not even introducing himself to the guy he’d researched online the night before.
“Oh, um, no,” Jared says, and stands. He stands, and Jensen almost takes a step back. He remembers reading that Jared was tall, but actually having the guy unfold in front of him is kind of unsettling. Jared stretches a hand out towards him and smiles. “I’m Jared. Jared Padalecki.”
“Jensen Ackles,” Jensen says, returning the smile and shaking the guy’s hand. It’s a bit sweaty and shaky, and Jensen lets his smile widen a little, loosening his own posture when he realizes just how nervous Jared is. “So, you’re Sam, huh?”
“Well, uh,” Jared flushes a little and shrugs, smile still playing on his lips, “Hopefully, I guess.”
Jensen takes a seat and slouches, looking up at Jared expectantly, and Jared visibly relaxes and follows suit.
****
Jared doesn’t know what he expected from Jensen, but he’s pretty sure it wasn’t this. He wasn’t expecting Jensen to come in and put him at ease. He knows that isn’t fair, but it’s not as if he was making assumptions about Jensen’s character. He tries his best not to do that with anybody. He worked and got along with Paris Hilton, for God’s sake. He tries to give everybody a clean slate, find the good in all of them and focus on that. It’s not that he expected Jensen to walk in and be a complete douche bag. It’s that he somehow expected Jensen to come in and immediately start acting him out of the place, whether the audition had started or not.
“Nah, you got it,” Jensen tells him, waving a hand in the air dismissively, and Jared can’t help but cock his head curiously.
“What makes you say that?”
“You’re the only one left,” Jensen says simply, shrugging. “They saw a lot of people for Sam. Pretty much everybody walked through those doors and read those lines.” Jensen grins. “I did.”
“Y-You…??” Jensen chuckles a little, and Jared’s pretty sure his eyes just bulged straight out of their sockets. He clears his throat and collects himself, figuring that was a less than stellar reaction. But Jensen doesn’t seem to mind. “So, it’s us then?” he says slowly. “I’m Sam and you’re Dean?”
“Ah,” Jensen says hesitantly, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck and ducking his head shyly, “Hopefully? They haven’t been searching for Dean the way they have for Sam. Not yet, anyway. I guess it depends on how this goes.”
“Well,” Jared fidgets a little and smiles back at Jensen, who looks at him curiously, “Let’s kick some ass, then.”
The Brawl
Jensen didn’t expect to have such a strong brotherly chemistry with Jared right off the bat. From the look that had been on Jared’s face, neither of them had expected the standing ovation they got after they read together. He doesn’t expect that chemistry to cross over into real life, him and Jared bonding in no time. He’s never had that happen before. But they have a lot in common, and it’s easy with Jared.
“That’s the guy!”
He certainly doesn’t expect a group of drunken assholes outside of a bar to start randomly taking swings at him after some chick in Vancouver recognizes him from the show. He’s suddenly really thankful to have had all the fight training he’s had, both from Dark Angel and from Supernatural. It’s coming in handy right about now.
But he knows what his objective is among a group of guys this big. It’s to fight to defend himself and then get away. He catches a break pretty early, surprised to have an out so soon and with so little damage done. He breaks away and chances a glance back, only to see Jared fighting, too, and his heart drops for a minute.
They’re teaming up on him. Jared’s got a group of guys around him throwing punches. They’re teaming up on him, and Jensen feels anger flare up hot inside of him. Fucking dickless sons of bitches…
****
Jared doesn’t expect to end up in a brawl, and he certainly doesn’t expect to lose. Except that’s what seems to be happening. There are just too many of them, and he’s lost sight of Jensen, but he prides himself on the injuries he’s still managed to inflict. He throws another punch, and he’s not quite sure what happens, doesn’t even really see it in the mess that he’s in, but he feels something crack, and he cries out in pain. Fuck, his hand hurts.
He forgets the pain when the absolute last thing he ever expected to see happens in a matter of seconds. All of a sudden, Jensen’s there. But Jensen isn’t just there. He’s there, fucking fly-kicking some asshole and punching another. Jensen’s beating his way through the crowd, and all Jared can do is stare, wide-eyed, until Jensen grabs his shirt and pulls.
“Let’s get the hell outta here!” Jensen shouts, and when Jensen pulls ahead, Jared follows robotically, hearing himself make a small sound of disappointment when his shirt rips. It’s not like the shirt even fucking matters, but Jared’s a little stunned at the moment.
They stop mid-run when the cops show up and grab the idiots that had attacked them. Jared curses silently to himself, but knows they did nothing wrong. They’ll probably have to tell their side of the story, but he can see some of the passersby telling it to the cops already.
“Are you okay?” Jordan asks, and shit, Jared just about forgot his friend was even there. He feels bad, and almost apologizes for it, except Jordan wouldn’t know what the hell he was apologizing for, and what Jordan didn’t know couldn’t hurt him.
“Yeah…” Jared barely even responds before Jensen’s reaching for his hand, brows drawn together in concern. Jared hadn’t even realized he’d been cupping his injured hand in the other, and he just stares dumbly when Jensen takes the broken hand in both of his own.
“Jared, you hurt?” Jensen asks, inspecting the hand, and Jared just shrugs. He watches, almost in fascination, as Jensen checks his hand over. The same two hands that had just bludgeoned a group of guys to shit are handling his broken one so gently that Jared thinks Jensen must be a walking fucking paradox.
Both of them look over towards the crowd when they hear the cops mention an ambulance. Jared sees a couple of guys on the ground groaning in pain, and looks over in wonder at Jensen, who grins back at him.
“We really fucked their shit up,” Jensen says proudly, and Jared almost asks him who the hell ‘we’ is, because he’s pretty sure those guys’ shits were thoroughly fucked up by Jensen, and Jensen alone. Jensen looks back down at Jared’s hand, still cradled in the Fists of Death. “Let’s get you checked out.”
The Scene
Jensen doesn’t expect his character to be so fucking emotional, but this second season is shaping up to be a doozy. Dean’s so fucked up. He’s crying again, just one more take for Kim. He can do it. He can, and he does, and when Kim calls it, he pushes off of the Impala and just starts walking. He’s put himself in a bad place to get to Dean’s pain. It’s not that he hasn’t done emotional scenes before, but Dean’s emotions just run so deep.
He doesn’t know where he’s going, just hopes the consistent motion of his steps will somehow help him walk it off and stop the tears he’s suddenly found a well of. He doesn’t expect Jared to follow him. He doesn’t expect Jared’s arm to wrap gently around his shoulders, staying there and moving with him as he walks. He doesn’t expect Jared to say anything to make him feel better, anything at all.
“Great scene, man,” Jared says quietly, and Jensen just sniffles, takes a deep breath, and stops walking. Jared stops with him, his arm still draped around Jensen’s shoulders, staying there through all the little hitches Jensen breathes through. No costar has ever done anything like this for him before.
Jensen feels himself calming down, his brain finally catching up with the fact that he was just acting. He reaches up and wipes his face with one hand, and slowly turns his head to look up at Jared, offering him a watery smile.
“Thanks.”
The Tear
Jared gets it now. He understands where Jensen’s head was at back when they shot that scene on the front of the Impala. He’s going there now, sitting alone on the set, concentrating on his pain, rocking back and forth with it. He hates it. It’s like fucking torture, but he needs it for this scene. He pictures his dogs, both of them, looking up at him in pain, some sympathetic animal doctor telling him that he has to do what’s best for both of them. He sees them lying there, sees them close their eyes, and he chokes on the image.
He gets up to do one take, and he feels tears wetting his cheeks in a flood. He can see the questioning concern in Jensen’s eyes when Dean melts away after Kim’s called cut, and he moves away. But Jensen’s there, on him quick.
“Jared, what the hell are you doing to yourself, man?” Jensen asks, damn near whispers, and Jared can’t keep a few more tears from escaping when he tells Jensen what his technique for this scene is.
He doesn’t expect Jensen to look almost as stricken as he feels when he tells him about the dogs. He doesn’t expect his own emotions to fuel Jensen’s. He certainly doesn’t expect to watch the scene over, only to see Jensen crying with him, for him, one single tear slipping down his cheek.
“Thanks for stealing my scene, asshole,” Jared says, finally smiling and shoving at Jensen, trying to make light of the situation. Jensen chuckles, but then gives him a look, and Jared feels something in his chest, rests his hand on Jensen’s back for a bit before pulling it away. “Thanks,” he says, barely audible enough for him to even hear himself say it. Jensen nods.
The Fight
Jensen doesn’t expect Jared to snap. Jared never snaps. Well, not at him, anyway. But Jared’s suddenly stepping up to him, and just the fact that he does it at all pisses Jensen off like nothing ever has before. He mimics the move, knows he’s mocking Jared with his expression, and sees Jared bristle in response.
Jared’s in his face now, trying to intimidate him, make him back down, and fuck that shit. Jensen’s never been so tense in his life, returning the favor and getting in the face of his costar, his best friend, both of them fuming with anger. He’s dimly aware of everyone on the crew gasping in shock.
With the look on Jared’s face, he expects Jared to hit him. He can feel it coming, feels it in the air. Except it never does. Something flickers in Jared’s eyes, and then Jared’s turning and walking away, stomping off to his trailer and slamming the door behind him.
Jensen has no idea what to do, his fists clenching and unclenching. He feels heat burning in his face, and feels incredibly stupid now, just standing there fuming with no one to fume at and everyone on set watching him. So, as he had throughout the fight, he mimics Jared, stalking off to his trailer and slamming the door, hoping that Jared hears it, too.
Jensen’s pretty sure it’s been a couple of hours, and in those hours, he hasn’t just brooded silently. He’s called people, people who have told him to get his head out of his ass and be a man. People who remind him just how tiring and stressful his job is. People who remind him that he’s exhausted, and that Jared’s just as exhausted as he is.
He stands up with a sigh and runs his hand through his hair. He really is tired. Stressed. He knows Jared’s no different. He knows that’s why this happened in the first place, and it’s so fucking stupid that he can barely stand it.
He knows he’s still irritable, but that he isn’t directing that at Jared anymore, and he opens his door and walks over to Jared’s trailer, right next to his. He knocks, expects to have to skirt Jared’s anger, explain himself, and start right off with an apology. He doesn’t expect to be engulfed in a hug as soon as the door opens and he’s stepped inside, Jared beating him to the apology before he can even blink.
“I’m sorry,” Jared mutters, and Jensen mimics Jared’s movements once again, wrapping his arms around him and returning the hug. “I’m sorry. I’m just so fucking tired.”
“I know,” Jensen says. “I’m sorry, too.”
The Thought
Jared doesn’t expect playing dead to be so hard. But here he is, lying on a mattress with his eyes closed. He doesn’t have to do anything else. It’s that simple. He’s dead.
No. Sam’s dead. Jared’s listening. Jared’s listening and trying to hold his breath. Which is hard when your breath wants to hitch in quiet sobs. He’s supposed to be dead, and he can feel himself starting to tear up behind his eyelids. Jensen is so wrecked and broken. He’s kicking the shit out of this scene. But Jared can’t wait until it’s over, and knows Jensen has to feel the same way.
He stays still between takes, as much as he wants to open his eyes and stretch. He’s almost afraid of ruining things, breaking the spell, the mood that’s hanging over all of them, and he can’t do that. Jensen’s worked so hard, and he owes it to Jensen to just stay there. Dead.
Kim finally calls it, and Jared opens his eyes and rubs at them before he looks for Jensen. Jensen’s standing above him, tears still rolling down his face, and Jared mutely raises a hand up towards him. Jensen grabs it reflexively, helps to pull him up. Someone else grabs Jensen’s attention, tells him people are there to interview him, and Jared’s almost shaking his head before Jensen is.
“I-I can’t,” Jensen stammers, running a trembling hand over his face. “I can’t. Not right now. I’m sorry. If they can wait…?”
They understand. They’d fucking have to understand, as far as Jared’s concerned. He wordlessly grabs Jensen and pulls him off set, sneaks them both away to his trailer, and sits Jensen down on the couch, drained.
“Jesus, Jensen. The dogs, your mother, what?” Jared asks, and Jensen knows what he’s asking, even though there wasn’t even a trace of a full sentence in there. Jensen always knows. But, as close as they are now, Jared doesn’t expect the answer Jensen gives him.
“No,” Jensen says tiredly, shaking his head, a brief smile flashing across his face so quickly Jared’s not even sure if it was ever really there. Jensen hesitates, swallows, and flicks his eyes up at Jared. “You.”
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen’s voice to crack when he says it, doesn’t expect Jensen to curse and swipe at fresh tears. He feels a bit of a lump grow in his own throat and sits down next to Jensen, pulling him into a hug, not expecting Jensen’s desperate grip on the back of his shirt.
“You.”
The Play
Jensen doesn’t expect many people besides his family and his girlfriend to come see him in the play in Dallas. It’s not a big deal, and everyone’s busy with their own shit. He doesn’t expect his phone to ring during intermission on the second night. He doesn’t expect the person on the other end to be Jared, who’s supposed to be in Vancouver filming his movie. He certainly doesn’t expect Jared to start the phone call off by telling him he’s kicking ass.
What?” Jensen says, completely stunned. “You’re here??”
“I wanted to surprise you!”
Jensen can’t help it. He’s grinning, ear to ear, his nerves dissipating, taken over by the happiness blooming in his chest.
“Man,” he says, knowing Jared can hear the smile in his voice, “You didn’t have to come all the way out here. Thank you.”
“Of course! I wanted to be here to see you!”
Jensen stays on the phone for a few minutes, brushing off Jared’s many compliments, but still drinking them in. It’s not the first time that he’s counting himself lucky to have Jared as a friend, and yet it surprises him every time. He looks for Jared when it’s over, sees his friend get up to lead a fucking standing ovation, and can’t wait to see him once he gets backstage.
The Death
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen to do the same thing he’d done when he’d died at the end of last season. Jared was lying on a mattress with his eyes closed, dry. Jensen’s lying on a hard floor, eyes open, fake blood all over his body. They’re not even on Jensen’s coverage anymore, and Jensen’s keeping it up, trying to give Jared the proper visual. It’s harder than Jared thought to go from feeling murderous to breaking down in a matter of seconds. Still, Jensen’s got to be sick of this by now. Especially after working his way through Dean’s violent death.
“You don’t have to do that, man,” Jared says softly, looking down at him, and Jensen just barely blinks, just barely moves his mouth, in an effort to stay in the exact same position he’s been in already. Dead.
“S’okay. Do it.”
He goes to kill Lilith, who flees Ruby’s body. He turns and sees Dean’s body, dropping the knife. His chest heaves, and his eyes fill with tears at the sight before him. It isn’t hard, now. It isn’t hard for the emotions to come when Dean is Jensen, torn apart and bloody, eyes open and lifeless, chest still. He reaches his hands around and under Jensen’s body, lifting him in his arms. He cries. He cries, with barely enough strength to splutter out Dean’s name.
There’s a sickening moment where he thinks he’s done, but Jensen still hasn’t moved, hasn’t blinked yet. Then Kim finally calls it, and Jensen’s blinking and looking, really looking, up at him. They help each other get to their feet and Jared hugs him, choking out one word that he knows Jensen will remember.
“You.”
The House
Jensen doesn’t expect Jared to ask him to move in with him. He figures Jared sees enough of him as it is. But Jared’s downright insistent about it. So, Jensen agrees to at least store his stuff at Jared’s house while he looks for a place. He doesn’t expect to end up there for good.
Except he never has any real time to look for another place. In the end, it’s Jared who convinces him to upgrade himself from an air mattress to a real bed and just fucking live there, dammit.
He doesn’t expect it to be as nice as it is, to work as well as it does. He doesn’t expect it to feel like family, like home. But it does.
****
Jared doesn’t expect Jensen to relax about this. He keeps telling him that it’s his house, too. But Jensen’s still acting like a guest, like a burden. It would piss Jared off, if he didn’t find it just a little endearing.
He doesn’t expect to come home to find Jensen anywhere but in his own room or on the couch, watching TV, constantly asking Jared’s permission to do anything else. He doesn’t expect to come home and find Jensen crashed out on the floor with Sadie, his head resting on her body, dog toys strewn around them. Harley? Harley greets him at the door, jumping up at him. But Sadie just lifts her head, looks up at him, looks at Jensen lying on her side, and then flops back down, unwilling to disturb her new playmate.
“Traitor,” he whispers, grinning, with his heart ready to burst. Her tail flops. Once.
He doesn’t expect his family to grow when he meets Jensen Ackles. But it does.