The see-saw has balanced. And it's time for me to exit.
"Im trying to find truth in words, in rhymes, in notes, in all the things I wish I'd wrote cause I feel like I've been losing you.
I read your last entry overprivelaged kids keep crying the need to fit in is harder when living life from a screen.
Old Classmates please drop all your pens dont write a word cause I wont reply and Im not bitter, no its just I've passed that
Point in my life" -I'm ready, I am-The Format
For one last favor-please read the lyrics. I heard that song yesterday, and it made me feel like that's exactly what needed to happen around here. It was almost like some sort of omen for me to finally end this.
I wrote an entry last night, but decided to delete it because I wasn't ready to. Then-I read how many comments I have on the last post that you all can see and read, and I just thought to myself...
"It really came down to this?"
I'm not questioning anyone's motivations. I'm not saying that people were trying to destroy live journal. I'm not saying that I'm weak and I can't handle people judging what I write.
But as Ritchie said, people started taking different perspectives of my journal than I wanted.
So that's why this will be my last entry as 'timeconsumer84.'
It lost all of it's appeal to me. I can't look at this 'update journal' page anymore and be able to think freely. I've been keeping a written journal for so long, maybe it's time to devote all of my attention to that.
But I can't forget everything that has happened around here. I met so many amazing people and I got to see awesome perspectives that I never knew out there.
luckiest_heart-I 'll keep reading your journal. I could relate to everything you said so well. You are good at balancing your journals out-to make them serious as well as light hearted. Glad we found each other. You're awesome. And I look up to you. We'll go get coffee sometime!
fading_ambition/takethisride-You're the reason for me being able to open up. You're the one who sparked something in me. That flame is still burning-whether you see it or not. You're an incredible writer, and although I didn't comment as much, it doesn't mean it never hit me. I trust I'll see you before I go.
xanthral-Because you leave me speechless. I never knew you had that writing capability in you. And I'm so glad you decided to share it. I miss you so much, and I'm happy we had this as our way of communicating. Don't ever, ever, EVER stop writing. It would be a terrible loss. You're strong, and you're smart. And you are able to see past an image. You have rare talent. I admire you.
dudeirock-I always read the song lyrics. ALWAYS. Although your poems I much prefer. Good luck with moving, and know that I think guys with glasses are hott-if that counts for much.
blue_light_g-I won't forget the long e-mails. And I won't forget how much you've helped me. Your journal is awesome to read because of all the random thoughts. I like those a lot. I can relate to you. Thanks-and I'll keep in touch with reading.
starstruck27- I always liked how you only posted when it was truly the right time-and never to get too involved. That was a good approach to take. I wish I would've noticed that from you. You're strong-willed. Never loose that. Cherish it-because most (as well as myself) don't have that.
rosy_wine-you threw a new light around here. Interesting how you went about doing that. No hard feelings on this side. I'll keep reading if you keep writing-just to see what other commotions you come up with.
I forgot some, I'm sure. But those were the ones that struck me right away. You all made this so wonderful and colorful in it's own way-and I hope you continue. It's time for me to move on. I don't want to write entries that have no feeling behind them-and I feel if I continued writing, I would defeat my whole purpose of starting lj in the first place.
The shackles around my ankles are unlocked, and I'm going to run until the sunset-until I am surrounded by his open arms ..... and freedom.
I'm now at-a loss for words.