(no subject)
I seem to be driveing my friends away from me, I spend more and more time by myself either listening to music or watching tv just because i don't have anyone but myself. I think over the last few years i've become a very u likeable person and all i seem to be able to do is either annoy people or anger them it all depends on who the person is, I get yelled at from everyone i know and everyone (Mostly my family) has a great time looking at all my faults and letting me know what a horrible person i am And letting everyone else know. Maybe someday i'll meet some people who really care about my feelings and make me feel welcomed rather then unwantd.
Just about every likes to get on me about everything, And about stupid crap such as that fact that i drive a chevy and display a bush cheney sticker on my bumber I'm sorry i can't drive a ford with a kerry edwards sticker but thats not my style and if you don't like me or what i stand for Don't talk to me about it cause i really don't care. And to all you freaking ford and kerry fanatics STOP GETTING ON MY BACK AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!.
Back in 2000 i started recording myself talking about just about everything that had to do with my life, I did this in 2000 2001 and 2002 In 02 my life changed alot and i hate that fact that it did. I used to be a really happy and upbeat person everyone always told me how much they liked haveing me around cause i lit up the room, Something happend that changed me and to this day i havn't figured it out. I'm not exactly a suicidal maniac but i'm not always smileing either, I have so many problems and i make everyone else problems mine so i'm over loaded with mine and everyone elses depressen. I sit here and listen to my old audio tapes from a few years ago I hear a happy voice and constant laughter and i ask myself what happend to me, Maybe everyone goes thru this change maybe i'm not the only one but i sure feel like the only one.
There are some friends that i have that i cannot live without and others that i'm still trying to live without but its not too easy, I just need to get my life back on track and figure out where i am before i fall off the face of the earth into some other life.
I miss the old days i miss the way my life used to be but i always remember something my brother told me
"The funny thing about the old days, the good old days, is that even though they are behind us, and they're over, we're still making new ones right now. A friend of mine once told me as I was complaining about missing the good old days,
"Someday this day, too, will be reflected on by you and you'll consider it one of 'the good old days'."
Her point was, even when life is crap, we are eternally living inside "the good old days", and once in a while if you stop and notice it, it feels better."
And he was right it kinda does make me feel better, You can learn alot from David if you stop and listen to what hes telling you
Later....
Just about every likes to get on me about everything, And about stupid crap such as that fact that i drive a chevy and display a bush cheney sticker on my bumber I'm sorry i can't drive a ford with a kerry edwards sticker but thats not my style and if you don't like me or what i stand for Don't talk to me about it cause i really don't care. And to all you freaking ford and kerry fanatics STOP GETTING ON MY BACK AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!.
Back in 2000 i started recording myself talking about just about everything that had to do with my life, I did this in 2000 2001 and 2002 In 02 my life changed alot and i hate that fact that it did. I used to be a really happy and upbeat person everyone always told me how much they liked haveing me around cause i lit up the room, Something happend that changed me and to this day i havn't figured it out. I'm not exactly a suicidal maniac but i'm not always smileing either, I have so many problems and i make everyone else problems mine so i'm over loaded with mine and everyone elses depressen. I sit here and listen to my old audio tapes from a few years ago I hear a happy voice and constant laughter and i ask myself what happend to me, Maybe everyone goes thru this change maybe i'm not the only one but i sure feel like the only one.
There are some friends that i have that i cannot live without and others that i'm still trying to live without but its not too easy, I just need to get my life back on track and figure out where i am before i fall off the face of the earth into some other life.
I miss the old days i miss the way my life used to be but i always remember something my brother told me
"The funny thing about the old days, the good old days, is that even though they are behind us, and they're over, we're still making new ones right now. A friend of mine once told me as I was complaining about missing the good old days,
"Someday this day, too, will be reflected on by you and you'll consider it one of 'the good old days'."
Her point was, even when life is crap, we are eternally living inside "the good old days", and once in a while if you stop and notice it, it feels better."
And he was right it kinda does make me feel better, You can learn alot from David if you stop and listen to what hes telling you
Later....