(no subject)
AS these self destructive patterens start to take hold, i can't help but wonder "what happened? Who destroyed my dreams? Was it me? or something greater? or are they destroyed?"
my purpose is so completely unknown to me...
dammit i know what i want i know what i want but i can not get what i want without first destroying myself and risking many valuable relationships...
i must wait
maybe i am supposed to go into my cocoon now...
maybe my decision will decide my fate as far as my cocoon
maybe i am already out of my cocoon and i am ready to move on to this new part of my life
i have a purpose to live,i have a reason to die, what is demanded of me will determine my fate.
i am rambling
forgive me
i have strayed from the point that i never made
i only wish i could make the point i have been meaning to make. I am lost
i am so very very lost
ihate this i hate myself i am going to let this selfdestruction take over and either ruin my life or rule it...
i take my last breath as a human here and now only to embrace the malestorm...
my purpose is so completely unknown to me...
dammit i know what i want i know what i want but i can not get what i want without first destroying myself and risking many valuable relationships...
i must wait
maybe i am supposed to go into my cocoon now...
maybe my decision will decide my fate as far as my cocoon
maybe i am already out of my cocoon and i am ready to move on to this new part of my life
i have a purpose to live,i have a reason to die, what is demanded of me will determine my fate.
i am rambling
forgive me
i have strayed from the point that i never made
i only wish i could make the point i have been meaning to make. I am lost
i am so very very lost
ihate this i hate myself i am going to let this selfdestruction take over and either ruin my life or rule it...
i take my last breath as a human here and now only to embrace the malestorm...