Crazy Fundies.
Ok, so I had one of those love-God, praise-Jesus, don't-you-wish-you-were-more-religious-like-all-the-happy-people-in-the-world chain mails waiting for me in my mailbox when I got to work this morning. Normally I skim, roll my eyes, and delete these things, but this one really bothered me. It reads as follows (I have elected to leave all the grammar as it was in the original...I think it reads with more of a flare that way):
~~~
DID YOU KNOW THESE FACTS?
I SURE DIDN'T TILL NOW.
Death is certain but the Bible speaks about untimely death!
Make a personal reflection about this.....
Very interesting, read until the end.....
It is written in the Bible (Galatians 6:7):
'Be not deceived; God is not mocked:
for whatsoever a man sow,
that shall he also reap.'
Here are some men and women who mocked God:
John Lennon (Singer):
Some years before, during his interview with an American Magazine, he said:
'Christianity will end, it will disappear. I do not have to argue about that. I am certain. Jesus was ok, but his subjects were too simple, today we are more famous than Him' (1966).
Lennon, after saying that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.
Tancredo Neves (President of Brazil):
During the Presidential campaign, he said if he got 500,000 votes from his party, not even God would remove him from Presidency.
Sure he got the votes, but he got sick a day before being made President, then he died.
Cazuza (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and poet):
During A show in Canecio (Rio de Janeiro) while smoking his cigarette, he puffed out some smoke into the air and said, 'God, that's for you.'
He died at the age of 32 of LUNG CANCER in a horrible manner.
The man who built the Titanic
After the construction of Titanic, a reporter asked him how safe the Titanic would be. With an ironic tone he said: 'Not even God can sink it'
The result: I think you all know what happened to the Titanic
Marilyn Monroe (Actress)
She was visited by Billy Graham during a presentation of a show. He said the Spirit of God had sent him to preach to her. After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said: 'I don't need your Jesus.'
A week later, she was found dead in her apartment
Bon Scott (Singer)
The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC . On one of his 1979 songs he sang:
'Don't stop me; I'm going down all the way, down the highway to hell'.
On the 19th of February 1980, Bon Scott was found dead, he had been choked by his own vomit.
Campinas (IN 2005)
In campinas, Brazil a group of friends, drunk, went to pick up a friend.....
The mother accompanied her to the car and was so worried about the drunkenness of her friends and she said to the daughter holding her hand, who was already seated in the car:
'My Daughter, Go With God And May He Protect You.'
She responded. 'Only If He (God) Travels In The Trunk, Cause Inside Here.....It's Already Full'
Hours later, news came by that they had been involved in a fatal accident, everyone had died. the car could not be recognized what type of car it had been, but surprisingly, the trunk was intact. The police said there was no way the trunk could have remained intact. To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of eggs, none was broken
Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer) said the Bible (Word of God) was the worst book ever written.
In June 2006 she was found burnt beyond recognition in her motor vehicle.
Many more important people have forgotten that there is no other name that was given so much authority as the name of Jesus.
Many have died, but only Jesus died and rose again, and he is still alive.
'Jesus'
I have done my part, Jesus said
'If you are embarrassed about me, I will also be embarrassed about you before my father.'
'Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen."
~~~
So, to sum up:
- John Lennon deserved to get shot 6 times because he made a crack about how famous the Beatles were
- That Cazuza guy deserved to die in a "horrible manner" because he blew some smoke at the sky (either that, or because he was bi, the sinning bastard)
- Jesus figured he might as well go ahead and kill Marilyn Monroe because she didn't fall on her knees and accept Him when an evangelist nut came knocking on her door
- God thought, "Hey, since this mother in Campinas isn't smart enough to KEEP HER DAUGHTER FROM DRIVING OFF IN A CAR OF INEBRIATED MORONS, I might as well have them all get in a car accident and die 'cause they weren't more serious about letting Jesus take the wheel. Also, let's go ahead and leave the trunk intact to make the whole thing more poetic."
And finally...
- ANYONE WHO DOESN'T LOVE THE BIBLE DESERVES TO BE BURNED TO DEATH BEYOND ALL RECOGNITION.
Because God's a sensitive, fickle bitch like that. Also, He gives us free will, but doesn't believe in free speech. Clearly. I mean, why smite all the people committing mass murder in His name when He can use non-religious famous people as target practice instead? YEARS after they insult Him, in some cases.
What the hell is wrong with people?? GARGH!
(And yes, Rom, I was thinking about Bron the whole time I was reading that e-mail and writing up this response. lol)
On a similar vein, I did something interesting this weekend: I visited Jesus' grave! :D
...I'll explain. lol
There's a little village in the middle of Aomori Prefecture called Shingo that claims to be the REAL burial site of Christ. Local legend has it that...well, hell, I'll just quote from the pamphlet:
~~
THE LEGEND OF DAITENKU TARO JURAI
Christ first came to Japan in the reign of the 11th Emperor, Suinin, landing at the port of Hashidate on the Japan Sea coast. Arriving in the provice of Etchu, He became a disciple of a distinguished person living in the region at the time and spent His time studying Japanese language, literature, and various other subjects.
At the end of the 11 years, Christ left Japan, now aged 33, landed in Morocco and returned to Judea, but after His return He continued to speak about the sacred land of Japan to John the Baptist and the people around him.
Christ's teachings were not accepted by the Jewish elders of the time, however, and He met with opposition from the Pharisee scholars. Finally He was arrested by the Roman soldiers and condemned to be crucified.
However, according to His will, it was His brother, Isukiri, who was nailed to the cross and died in His place. It was not Christ, but His brother who uttered the sorrowful cry in the Bible, 'My God, why have You forsaken me?' Saved from crucifixion, Christ fled to Siberia with several of His disciples and went into hiding.
Christ traveled from place to place in the wilderness of Siberia, suffering hardship and privation, and in the fourth year, on 26 February, He boarded a ship from Alaska, landing at Hachinohe in Aomori prefecture. In Japan, Christ changed His name to Daitenku Taro Jurai and settled down in Herai village in the Tohoku region. He took a Japanese woman called Miyuko as His wife and they had three daughters.
Just as Herai, the name of the village, is said to be a distortion of the word 'Hebrew', many customs and manners which appear to be related to Judea can still be found today.
For example, the word for father is 'Aya' or 'Dada' and the word for mother is 'Aba' or 'Gaga'. Other customs include drawing a cross on a child's forehead when it is taken outside for the first time after birth, or licking your finger and drawing a cross on your forehead when your legs become numb from sitting. If you do this three times, the numbness will go away. Such customs have been passed down through the ages and the present elders of the village, now in their 80's, learned them as children.
Legend says that Christ passed away in Herai village at the age of 106. According to His will, His body was exposed to the wind and rain on Mt. Herai which rises to a height of 1,159m about sixteen kilometers west of the village, and then his bones were buried four years later.
The burial took place on top of a small hill which overlooks the village where there are two mounds, each surmounted by a white cross. The cross on the right is said to mark Christ's grave and is inscribed with the words "Juraizuka' from Christ's Japanese name. The cross on the left, called 'Judaibo', is where the ear of His brother and the hair of the Virgin Mary which He took with Him when He fled crucifixion, are said to be buried.
~~
...Just when you thought the Greatest Story Ever Told couldn't get any more exciting! lol
I would love to throw the maniac who wrote that e-mail and the dude that came up with this legend into a room together and just see whose head explodes first. My money's on the Japanese guy.
Pictures of the Jesus grave site can be found here.
~~~
DID YOU KNOW THESE FACTS?
I SURE DIDN'T TILL NOW.
Death is certain but the Bible speaks about untimely death!
Make a personal reflection about this.....
Very interesting, read until the end.....
It is written in the Bible (Galatians 6:7):
'Be not deceived; God is not mocked:
for whatsoever a man sow,
that shall he also reap.'
Here are some men and women who mocked God:
John Lennon (Singer):
Some years before, during his interview with an American Magazine, he said:
'Christianity will end, it will disappear. I do not have to argue about that. I am certain. Jesus was ok, but his subjects were too simple, today we are more famous than Him' (1966).
Lennon, after saying that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.
Tancredo Neves (President of Brazil):
During the Presidential campaign, he said if he got 500,000 votes from his party, not even God would remove him from Presidency.
Sure he got the votes, but he got sick a day before being made President, then he died.
Cazuza (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and poet):
During A show in Canecio (Rio de Janeiro) while smoking his cigarette, he puffed out some smoke into the air and said, 'God, that's for you.'
He died at the age of 32 of LUNG CANCER in a horrible manner.
The man who built the Titanic
After the construction of Titanic, a reporter asked him how safe the Titanic would be. With an ironic tone he said: 'Not even God can sink it'
The result: I think you all know what happened to the Titanic
Marilyn Monroe (Actress)
She was visited by Billy Graham during a presentation of a show. He said the Spirit of God had sent him to preach to her. After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said: 'I don't need your Jesus.'
A week later, she was found dead in her apartment
Bon Scott (Singer)
The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC . On one of his 1979 songs he sang:
'Don't stop me; I'm going down all the way, down the highway to hell'.
On the 19th of February 1980, Bon Scott was found dead, he had been choked by his own vomit.
Campinas (IN 2005)
In campinas, Brazil a group of friends, drunk, went to pick up a friend.....
The mother accompanied her to the car and was so worried about the drunkenness of her friends and she said to the daughter holding her hand, who was already seated in the car:
'My Daughter, Go With God And May He Protect You.'
She responded. 'Only If He (God) Travels In The Trunk, Cause Inside Here.....It's Already Full'
Hours later, news came by that they had been involved in a fatal accident, everyone had died. the car could not be recognized what type of car it had been, but surprisingly, the trunk was intact. The police said there was no way the trunk could have remained intact. To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of eggs, none was broken
Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer) said the Bible (Word of God) was the worst book ever written.
In June 2006 she was found burnt beyond recognition in her motor vehicle.
Many more important people have forgotten that there is no other name that was given so much authority as the name of Jesus.
Many have died, but only Jesus died and rose again, and he is still alive.
'Jesus'
I have done my part, Jesus said
'If you are embarrassed about me, I will also be embarrassed about you before my father.'
'Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen."
~~~
So, to sum up:
- John Lennon deserved to get shot 6 times because he made a crack about how famous the Beatles were
- That Cazuza guy deserved to die in a "horrible manner" because he blew some smoke at the sky (either that, or because he was bi, the sinning bastard)
- Jesus figured he might as well go ahead and kill Marilyn Monroe because she didn't fall on her knees and accept Him when an evangelist nut came knocking on her door
- God thought, "Hey, since this mother in Campinas isn't smart enough to KEEP HER DAUGHTER FROM DRIVING OFF IN A CAR OF INEBRIATED MORONS, I might as well have them all get in a car accident and die 'cause they weren't more serious about letting Jesus take the wheel. Also, let's go ahead and leave the trunk intact to make the whole thing more poetic."
And finally...
- ANYONE WHO DOESN'T LOVE THE BIBLE DESERVES TO BE BURNED TO DEATH BEYOND ALL RECOGNITION.
Because God's a sensitive, fickle bitch like that. Also, He gives us free will, but doesn't believe in free speech. Clearly. I mean, why smite all the people committing mass murder in His name when He can use non-religious famous people as target practice instead? YEARS after they insult Him, in some cases.
What the hell is wrong with people?? GARGH!
(And yes, Rom, I was thinking about Bron the whole time I was reading that e-mail and writing up this response. lol)
On a similar vein, I did something interesting this weekend: I visited Jesus' grave! :D
...I'll explain. lol
There's a little village in the middle of Aomori Prefecture called Shingo that claims to be the REAL burial site of Christ. Local legend has it that...well, hell, I'll just quote from the pamphlet:
~~
THE LEGEND OF DAITENKU TARO JURAI
Christ first came to Japan in the reign of the 11th Emperor, Suinin, landing at the port of Hashidate on the Japan Sea coast. Arriving in the provice of Etchu, He became a disciple of a distinguished person living in the region at the time and spent His time studying Japanese language, literature, and various other subjects.
At the end of the 11 years, Christ left Japan, now aged 33, landed in Morocco and returned to Judea, but after His return He continued to speak about the sacred land of Japan to John the Baptist and the people around him.
Christ's teachings were not accepted by the Jewish elders of the time, however, and He met with opposition from the Pharisee scholars. Finally He was arrested by the Roman soldiers and condemned to be crucified.
However, according to His will, it was His brother, Isukiri, who was nailed to the cross and died in His place. It was not Christ, but His brother who uttered the sorrowful cry in the Bible, 'My God, why have You forsaken me?' Saved from crucifixion, Christ fled to Siberia with several of His disciples and went into hiding.
Christ traveled from place to place in the wilderness of Siberia, suffering hardship and privation, and in the fourth year, on 26 February, He boarded a ship from Alaska, landing at Hachinohe in Aomori prefecture. In Japan, Christ changed His name to Daitenku Taro Jurai and settled down in Herai village in the Tohoku region. He took a Japanese woman called Miyuko as His wife and they had three daughters.
Just as Herai, the name of the village, is said to be a distortion of the word 'Hebrew', many customs and manners which appear to be related to Judea can still be found today.
For example, the word for father is 'Aya' or 'Dada' and the word for mother is 'Aba' or 'Gaga'. Other customs include drawing a cross on a child's forehead when it is taken outside for the first time after birth, or licking your finger and drawing a cross on your forehead when your legs become numb from sitting. If you do this three times, the numbness will go away. Such customs have been passed down through the ages and the present elders of the village, now in their 80's, learned them as children.
Legend says that Christ passed away in Herai village at the age of 106. According to His will, His body was exposed to the wind and rain on Mt. Herai which rises to a height of 1,159m about sixteen kilometers west of the village, and then his bones were buried four years later.
The burial took place on top of a small hill which overlooks the village where there are two mounds, each surmounted by a white cross. The cross on the right is said to mark Christ's grave and is inscribed with the words "Juraizuka' from Christ's Japanese name. The cross on the left, called 'Judaibo', is where the ear of His brother and the hair of the Virgin Mary which He took with Him when He fled crucifixion, are said to be buried.
~~
...Just when you thought the Greatest Story Ever Told couldn't get any more exciting! lol
I would love to throw the maniac who wrote that e-mail and the dude that came up with this legend into a room together and just see whose head explodes first. My money's on the Japanese guy.
Pictures of the Jesus grave site can be found here.