SGA Ficlet: In the Name of Science (Zelenka, McKay/Sheppard. PG)
Title: In the Name of Science
Pairing: Zelenka, McKay/Sheppard (non-explicit)
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Started in reaction to Trinity, but no spoilers.
Disclaimer: So not mine.
Summary: Already Radek can feel the headache creeping up from his shoulders to the base of his skull and this, he thinks, yes this, is what he gets for trying to do a good thing for a friend.
Author's Notes: I started this last August in my post-Trinity make-it-better-now-please phase, but it ended up stalling out on me. I looked at it again a few weeks ago, decided I liked what I had enough to try to finish it, and so here we are. Many thanks to krabbypatty and visionshadows for the betas! All remaining mistakes are, of course, mine.
Already Radek can feel the headache creeping up from his shoulders to the base of his skull and this, he thinks, yes this, is what he gets for trying to do a good thing for a friend. This, and the pleasure of dealing with high ranking military officers who insist on being dense and not understanding, even when Radek is being as clear as he feels it prudent be.
Colonel Sheppard says, "But McKay never mentioned any plans to test the Jumper systems today to me. The last time we talked, he was still going on about the ZPM, talking about his plans for that."
Which is, of course, true. Even at breakfast this morning, from all the way across the dining hall, Radek was able to hear Rodney talking about the ZPM. It is true and Radek is lying and he is almost glad that they are conducting this conversation over the radio, because this way the Colonel cannot see the way that he is pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. It is good, too, because if Radek actually gives in to the temptation to bang his head against the nearest circuitry panel, the Colonel will not be able to see that either.
Of course, if they were face to face, Radek would not need to be circumspect about what he says. He would be able to tell the Colonel exactly *why* he wanted the trip to the mainland on a day when, yes, they all really had other, more useful things to be doing.
He says, "It is a spur of the moment project, Colonel, and we, Rodney and I, really need your assistance with this." He puts extra emphasis on the ‘Rodney’ and the ‘assistance’, enough that he hopes the Colonel will finally gather a clue, but not so much that the other people who are listening in on the Colonel’s end of the conversation will think that anything is odd.
The silence stretches out on the other end, a moment, two, and with it, Radek’s hope grows. Maybe, he thinks, if he is lucky, there will be no more mention of Rodney being qualified to fly a Jumper, too. No more comments on the fact that usually they plan tests at least a week in advance and write them on the big master calendar.
Moment three comes, and even if it is not Rodney’s, it seems that it is Radek’s lucky day.
The Colonel says, "Okay, I think I have a few hours that I can spare in the name of science. I’ll be there in fifteen." He speaks slowly, as if he is still thinking it over, already regretting, and then he sighs, as if it will be a great burden on his time. Radek knows that the message has been delivered, though, understood. Knows that what the Colonel does now is just for show. That he is on his way.
"Thank you, Colonel," Radek says, and it is perfect timing, yes, because just as Radek clicks the radio off, the door to the Jumper Bay slides open. Radek has been sitting in Jumper 5-it is as close to privacy, to a private workspace as he will ever have in Atlantis-but he is standing, stepping out onto the ramp, in time to see Rodney come inside.
For a moment, the sound of the city filters in through the open door, but then Rodney takes one last step forward and it slides shut behind him. His arms, which were hanging down by his sides, hands loosely clenched into fists, come up to cross over his chest. He is shaking, too, Radek notices; even from this distance, he can see the fine tremors running through Rodney’s body, the pale wash of his cheeks.
"Somehow, I thought you’d be gone by now," Rodney says finally, after a moment. "Didn’t anyone think to warn you that I was heading in this direction?" He almost smiles, but it is bitter and Radek watches as it is chipped away before it has time to even develop.
Radek takes another step forward, down onto the ramp. "I was warned."
He doesn’t say, three times.
Miko first, softly saying that Dr. McKay would be heading down to the Jumper Bay, and she thought Radek ought to know. Kavanagh in the middle, amused, saying, watch out! McKay’s on the warpath! Simpson last, with details: an untended for too long experiment with one of the Naquadah generators gone awry, which created an energy pulse that managed to not only wipe the hard drives of the computers within a five foot radius, but also to screw up the calibration of all of the equipment in the room. Rodney was on his way to see Elizabeth, Simpson said, but he’d also made talk of coming to see Radek, and really, she was very sorry.
Usually, Radek knows, when Rodney gets mad, he gets very, very loud. It is possible to hear him three labs over, even through walls and sound proofing. It is when he gets silent that Radek knows to worry, and Rodney is silent now, as still as Radek has ever seen him.
"Sit," Radek says, indicating the area in the back of Jumper 5. "Breathe."
Rodney nods, and it is a testament to exactly how upset that he is that he does what he’s told. As he walks up the ramp slowly, his breathing uneven, Radek knows that he made the right choice contacting the Colonel-Radek cannot provide the sort of comfort that Rodney needs right now.
He stays where he is as Rodney settles in the back of the jumper, listens as he sits, as his head thumps back against the wall, and he stays there, on guard, prepared to turn away anyone who is foolish enough to search Rodney out.
*
It does not take the Colonel fifteen minutes to arrive, as Radek had known it would not. It takes him six, and he’s breathless when he walks quickly through the door, stops still once he’s inside. From the way that he is turning his head around, Radek knows that he’s searching Rodney out, so he gestures at the Jumper behind him.
"He is inside, breathing," he said.
"But he’s okay?" the Colonel asks, and he has to know that it is not a medical emergency, or any other sort of emergency, or else he would not have been hearing anything from Radek.
Radek nods.
"He has had a bad day," he says, "but it is nothing fresh air and a few hours away from the ‘idiots’ in the lab won’t cure." And then the Colonel is shouldering past him, into the Jumper.
Radek thinks that he should give them a moment, gather his tools for the Jumper system tests that *he* will be doing, but he cannot help but turn to watch.
He sees Sheppard sink to his knees in front of Rodney, watches as the Colonel’s hand comes to rest on Rodney’s thigh, squeezing once, as Rodney tips his head forward, meeting the Colonel’s gaze, locking with it, and Radek knows that they are saying things without words. A few moments later, the Colonel turns back to Radek and says, "Okay, we ready to go?"
"A minute," Radek says and already he is bending down to grab the toolbox at the bottom of the ramp and also a few of the Ancient screwdrivers that have spilled out onto the floor. "One minute, Colonel."
An extra data pad, a flashlight, and when he turns back to the interior of the Jumper, he sees that Sheppard has moved from his spot in front of Rodney and is now sitting in the pilot’s chair, looking over his shoulder at Radek.
Radek steps fully into the Jumper, but there is no time to put the toolbox down, even, before the hatch closes behind him and the Jumper lifts off the ground. He manages to make his way to the front section of the ship just as the Colonel clears their departure with the Control Room, but he is strapped in, seatbelt fastened, by the time they leave the Jumper Bay.
*
It is after they are flying at an even altitude that Radek opens his eyes again and turns to look at the Colonel. The man’s face is drawn, Radek sees, pale, and his lips are pressed together in a thin, straight line. The Colonel’s breathing is harsh, deep and steady through his nose, and there is a muscle at the edge of his clenched jaw that is twitching.
Watching him now, Radek has no doubt, suddenly, that when they return to Atlantis, the Colonel will be scheduling a meeting with Dr. Weir. That the passenger manifest for the Daedalus’ next return trip to Earth will most likely be a few names longer than originally thought. That it will be padded with scientists who no longer have a place in Atlantis.
Given that he is still able to feel Rodney’s silent anger behind him, Radek cannot say that he is sorry about this.
He does not truly realize that he is staring, though, until the Colonel turns to glance at him. At any other time, Radek thinks, his own look would have been met with a raised eyebrow, or perhaps a smirk. Not now, though. Now, the Colonel’s expression is flat, his gaze hard.
He says, "You got any particular place you want to run these diagnostics?"
Radek does not, so he shakes his head. He has only been to the mainland maybe five times since he first stepped through the Gate, after all, whereas the Colonel has been many more. He says, "Wherever you think is best, Colonel. You are familiar with the mainland, yes?"
The Colonel nods, then turns the Jumper slightly to the left, and when Radek looks out the front window of the Jumper again, he sees water, water, water, and then all of a sudden, land. Beaches, green hills, trees, rivers, and then they are turning back towards the water, back towards the sand, slowing, slowing.
The Colonel brings the Jumper to rest on the top of a hill-dune, on top of grass that tapers away into brown dirt, then sand. Radek watches as he pulls his hands away from the controls, hands going back to his lap, and then there is silence.
There is silence until Rodney stirs behind them, unhooking his own seatbelt. Until the other man says, "Where are we?" His voice is still devoid of emotion, though, and when Radek turns to look at him, he can still see the fine trembling of his limbs.
Radek does not know the answer to Rodney’s question, of course, but when he turns to Colonel Sheppard, he sees the man shrug. "Does it matter?" the Colonel asks, and then he, too, is unhooking his seatbelt, and he is standing, and then he is walking to Rodney and saying, "Come on, McKay. Let’s go find something for you to take your aggressions out on."
"What, like *sand*?" Rodney asks, standing, and Radek breathes a sigh of relief, because it is the most Rodney-sounding thing that Radek has heard Rodney say in many hours, since breakfast. Yes, the tone is still a bit too empty, but Radek thinks that he sees the Colonel relax a bit, too.
"Or we could find something for you to hit with a piece of driftwood," the Colonel says. "Or maybe a piece we could use for target practice instead?"
Radek has high hopes for an eye roll in answer to that. For Rodney to make some comment about stupid ideas, or how the only things (people) he wants to hit with a piece of driftwood are back in Atlantis, or how violence isn’t always the answer, Colonel, but Radek is to be disappointed.
Rodney, he knows, is not that easily fixed.
Instead, he watches as the Colonel lets his hand hover at the small of Rodney’s back, as he encourages him down the lowering hatch-ramp. Before they turn down to the beach, though, just before they are out of Radek’s sight, the Colonel turns back to him and says, "How long do you think you’ll need, Doc? An hour? Two?"
"As much time as you wish to give me, Colonel," Radek says, and the Colonel nods.
Then they are out of Radek’s sight.
Radek sits for a few minutes, staring out over the ocean, the waves that are lapping gently at the shore. It is only a few minutes, though, before he undoes his own seatbelt, stands. Gets his toolbox from the back of the Jumper and unhooks the lid. He pulls out the instruments that he needs, removes the cover from one of the control panels, and sets to work.
He is not surprised, twenty minutes later, when he hears the sound of gunfire in the distance.
Two hours after that, when he is done with his tests and he steps outside the Jumper and walks to the edge of the hill-dune, he is even less surprised to see the Colonel sitting in the sand down below, Rodney mercifully relaxed against him. The Colonel’s arm is wrapped around Rodney’s body, Radek sees, and Rodney’s head is tipped to the Colonel’s shoulder.
Even from this distance, Radek can tell that Rodney is no longer trembling.
It is good, Radek thinks, and as he watches the Colonel bend his head down to say something to Rodney, Radek knows that he made the right choice, asking the Colonel to accompany them.
Yes, Radek thinks, the right choice indeed.
The End.
Pairing: Zelenka, McKay/Sheppard (non-explicit)
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Started in reaction to Trinity, but no spoilers.
Disclaimer: So not mine.
Summary: Already Radek can feel the headache creeping up from his shoulders to the base of his skull and this, he thinks, yes this, is what he gets for trying to do a good thing for a friend.
Author's Notes: I started this last August in my post-Trinity make-it-better-now-please phase, but it ended up stalling out on me. I looked at it again a few weeks ago, decided I liked what I had enough to try to finish it, and so here we are. Many thanks to krabbypatty and visionshadows for the betas! All remaining mistakes are, of course, mine.
Already Radek can feel the headache creeping up from his shoulders to the base of his skull and this, he thinks, yes this, is what he gets for trying to do a good thing for a friend. This, and the pleasure of dealing with high ranking military officers who insist on being dense and not understanding, even when Radek is being as clear as he feels it prudent be.
Colonel Sheppard says, "But McKay never mentioned any plans to test the Jumper systems today to me. The last time we talked, he was still going on about the ZPM, talking about his plans for that."
Which is, of course, true. Even at breakfast this morning, from all the way across the dining hall, Radek was able to hear Rodney talking about the ZPM. It is true and Radek is lying and he is almost glad that they are conducting this conversation over the radio, because this way the Colonel cannot see the way that he is pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. It is good, too, because if Radek actually gives in to the temptation to bang his head against the nearest circuitry panel, the Colonel will not be able to see that either.
Of course, if they were face to face, Radek would not need to be circumspect about what he says. He would be able to tell the Colonel exactly *why* he wanted the trip to the mainland on a day when, yes, they all really had other, more useful things to be doing.
He says, "It is a spur of the moment project, Colonel, and we, Rodney and I, really need your assistance with this." He puts extra emphasis on the ‘Rodney’ and the ‘assistance’, enough that he hopes the Colonel will finally gather a clue, but not so much that the other people who are listening in on the Colonel’s end of the conversation will think that anything is odd.
The silence stretches out on the other end, a moment, two, and with it, Radek’s hope grows. Maybe, he thinks, if he is lucky, there will be no more mention of Rodney being qualified to fly a Jumper, too. No more comments on the fact that usually they plan tests at least a week in advance and write them on the big master calendar.
Moment three comes, and even if it is not Rodney’s, it seems that it is Radek’s lucky day.
The Colonel says, "Okay, I think I have a few hours that I can spare in the name of science. I’ll be there in fifteen." He speaks slowly, as if he is still thinking it over, already regretting, and then he sighs, as if it will be a great burden on his time. Radek knows that the message has been delivered, though, understood. Knows that what the Colonel does now is just for show. That he is on his way.
"Thank you, Colonel," Radek says, and it is perfect timing, yes, because just as Radek clicks the radio off, the door to the Jumper Bay slides open. Radek has been sitting in Jumper 5-it is as close to privacy, to a private workspace as he will ever have in Atlantis-but he is standing, stepping out onto the ramp, in time to see Rodney come inside.
For a moment, the sound of the city filters in through the open door, but then Rodney takes one last step forward and it slides shut behind him. His arms, which were hanging down by his sides, hands loosely clenched into fists, come up to cross over his chest. He is shaking, too, Radek notices; even from this distance, he can see the fine tremors running through Rodney’s body, the pale wash of his cheeks.
"Somehow, I thought you’d be gone by now," Rodney says finally, after a moment. "Didn’t anyone think to warn you that I was heading in this direction?" He almost smiles, but it is bitter and Radek watches as it is chipped away before it has time to even develop.
Radek takes another step forward, down onto the ramp. "I was warned."
He doesn’t say, three times.
Miko first, softly saying that Dr. McKay would be heading down to the Jumper Bay, and she thought Radek ought to know. Kavanagh in the middle, amused, saying, watch out! McKay’s on the warpath! Simpson last, with details: an untended for too long experiment with one of the Naquadah generators gone awry, which created an energy pulse that managed to not only wipe the hard drives of the computers within a five foot radius, but also to screw up the calibration of all of the equipment in the room. Rodney was on his way to see Elizabeth, Simpson said, but he’d also made talk of coming to see Radek, and really, she was very sorry.
Usually, Radek knows, when Rodney gets mad, he gets very, very loud. It is possible to hear him three labs over, even through walls and sound proofing. It is when he gets silent that Radek knows to worry, and Rodney is silent now, as still as Radek has ever seen him.
"Sit," Radek says, indicating the area in the back of Jumper 5. "Breathe."
Rodney nods, and it is a testament to exactly how upset that he is that he does what he’s told. As he walks up the ramp slowly, his breathing uneven, Radek knows that he made the right choice contacting the Colonel-Radek cannot provide the sort of comfort that Rodney needs right now.
He stays where he is as Rodney settles in the back of the jumper, listens as he sits, as his head thumps back against the wall, and he stays there, on guard, prepared to turn away anyone who is foolish enough to search Rodney out.
*
It does not take the Colonel fifteen minutes to arrive, as Radek had known it would not. It takes him six, and he’s breathless when he walks quickly through the door, stops still once he’s inside. From the way that he is turning his head around, Radek knows that he’s searching Rodney out, so he gestures at the Jumper behind him.
"He is inside, breathing," he said.
"But he’s okay?" the Colonel asks, and he has to know that it is not a medical emergency, or any other sort of emergency, or else he would not have been hearing anything from Radek.
Radek nods.
"He has had a bad day," he says, "but it is nothing fresh air and a few hours away from the ‘idiots’ in the lab won’t cure." And then the Colonel is shouldering past him, into the Jumper.
Radek thinks that he should give them a moment, gather his tools for the Jumper system tests that *he* will be doing, but he cannot help but turn to watch.
He sees Sheppard sink to his knees in front of Rodney, watches as the Colonel’s hand comes to rest on Rodney’s thigh, squeezing once, as Rodney tips his head forward, meeting the Colonel’s gaze, locking with it, and Radek knows that they are saying things without words. A few moments later, the Colonel turns back to Radek and says, "Okay, we ready to go?"
"A minute," Radek says and already he is bending down to grab the toolbox at the bottom of the ramp and also a few of the Ancient screwdrivers that have spilled out onto the floor. "One minute, Colonel."
An extra data pad, a flashlight, and when he turns back to the interior of the Jumper, he sees that Sheppard has moved from his spot in front of Rodney and is now sitting in the pilot’s chair, looking over his shoulder at Radek.
Radek steps fully into the Jumper, but there is no time to put the toolbox down, even, before the hatch closes behind him and the Jumper lifts off the ground. He manages to make his way to the front section of the ship just as the Colonel clears their departure with the Control Room, but he is strapped in, seatbelt fastened, by the time they leave the Jumper Bay.
*
It is after they are flying at an even altitude that Radek opens his eyes again and turns to look at the Colonel. The man’s face is drawn, Radek sees, pale, and his lips are pressed together in a thin, straight line. The Colonel’s breathing is harsh, deep and steady through his nose, and there is a muscle at the edge of his clenched jaw that is twitching.
Watching him now, Radek has no doubt, suddenly, that when they return to Atlantis, the Colonel will be scheduling a meeting with Dr. Weir. That the passenger manifest for the Daedalus’ next return trip to Earth will most likely be a few names longer than originally thought. That it will be padded with scientists who no longer have a place in Atlantis.
Given that he is still able to feel Rodney’s silent anger behind him, Radek cannot say that he is sorry about this.
He does not truly realize that he is staring, though, until the Colonel turns to glance at him. At any other time, Radek thinks, his own look would have been met with a raised eyebrow, or perhaps a smirk. Not now, though. Now, the Colonel’s expression is flat, his gaze hard.
He says, "You got any particular place you want to run these diagnostics?"
Radek does not, so he shakes his head. He has only been to the mainland maybe five times since he first stepped through the Gate, after all, whereas the Colonel has been many more. He says, "Wherever you think is best, Colonel. You are familiar with the mainland, yes?"
The Colonel nods, then turns the Jumper slightly to the left, and when Radek looks out the front window of the Jumper again, he sees water, water, water, and then all of a sudden, land. Beaches, green hills, trees, rivers, and then they are turning back towards the water, back towards the sand, slowing, slowing.
The Colonel brings the Jumper to rest on the top of a hill-dune, on top of grass that tapers away into brown dirt, then sand. Radek watches as he pulls his hands away from the controls, hands going back to his lap, and then there is silence.
There is silence until Rodney stirs behind them, unhooking his own seatbelt. Until the other man says, "Where are we?" His voice is still devoid of emotion, though, and when Radek turns to look at him, he can still see the fine trembling of his limbs.
Radek does not know the answer to Rodney’s question, of course, but when he turns to Colonel Sheppard, he sees the man shrug. "Does it matter?" the Colonel asks, and then he, too, is unhooking his seatbelt, and he is standing, and then he is walking to Rodney and saying, "Come on, McKay. Let’s go find something for you to take your aggressions out on."
"What, like *sand*?" Rodney asks, standing, and Radek breathes a sigh of relief, because it is the most Rodney-sounding thing that Radek has heard Rodney say in many hours, since breakfast. Yes, the tone is still a bit too empty, but Radek thinks that he sees the Colonel relax a bit, too.
"Or we could find something for you to hit with a piece of driftwood," the Colonel says. "Or maybe a piece we could use for target practice instead?"
Radek has high hopes for an eye roll in answer to that. For Rodney to make some comment about stupid ideas, or how the only things (people) he wants to hit with a piece of driftwood are back in Atlantis, or how violence isn’t always the answer, Colonel, but Radek is to be disappointed.
Rodney, he knows, is not that easily fixed.
Instead, he watches as the Colonel lets his hand hover at the small of Rodney’s back, as he encourages him down the lowering hatch-ramp. Before they turn down to the beach, though, just before they are out of Radek’s sight, the Colonel turns back to him and says, "How long do you think you’ll need, Doc? An hour? Two?"
"As much time as you wish to give me, Colonel," Radek says, and the Colonel nods.
Then they are out of Radek’s sight.
Radek sits for a few minutes, staring out over the ocean, the waves that are lapping gently at the shore. It is only a few minutes, though, before he undoes his own seatbelt, stands. Gets his toolbox from the back of the Jumper and unhooks the lid. He pulls out the instruments that he needs, removes the cover from one of the control panels, and sets to work.
He is not surprised, twenty minutes later, when he hears the sound of gunfire in the distance.
Two hours after that, when he is done with his tests and he steps outside the Jumper and walks to the edge of the hill-dune, he is even less surprised to see the Colonel sitting in the sand down below, Rodney mercifully relaxed against him. The Colonel’s arm is wrapped around Rodney’s body, Radek sees, and Rodney’s head is tipped to the Colonel’s shoulder.
Even from this distance, Radek can tell that Rodney is no longer trembling.
It is good, Radek thinks, and as he watches the Colonel bend his head down to say something to Rodney, Radek knows that he made the right choice, asking the Colonel to accompany them.
Yes, Radek thinks, the right choice indeed.
The End.