Yesterday and Today
Easter. That has always been, and probably will always be, my holiday. There was always something special about it I could never put my finger on and still to this day can't pinpoint the exact reason I adore it so much. It is a holiday that is, in the grand scheme of things, overlooked. But me...I could never sleep the night before Easter, I was bursting with too much excitement and I wanted to be awake when the Easter Bunny came to the door. I always wondered how I missed him, but I would dig eagerly into the pink basket he left me. I always dove straight for the jelly beans while my sister attacked her chocolate. Still, to this day, I have a jelly bean fetish. I can't start eating jelly beans because I'll eat them all in a sitting, well everything but the nasty green ones. Blech. Then of course there was the long awaited Easter egg hunt in the back yard, I usually went for the ones that weren't in plain view, I liked the challenge. Kind of like me later in life, I like to ponder, to puzzle, to figure out things. To search for hidden meanings and find what I seek. Okay...did I just analyze me when I was a child? It seems like it, heh. But really I wasn't a normal child, my mom has told me this time and time again then I compare my memories and actions to others. As you can guess my thoughts and feelings then were just as deep as they are now. I remember thinking things that most children don't. But I digress. All in all Easter just felt good, it seemed to tingle all through me and it still does. Even on the years when it doesn't feel as euphoric.
When I got older and made the decison to attend church, Easter took on a new, spirital meaning. Which only further enhanced my love of it. Being in church during this holiday season just feels so good. I don't know why but it just feels more peaceful and warm. At least to me. I don't attend church now and I'm not a religious person perse but I miss the atmosphere. Having a place to collect all my thoughts and prays at. I also feel more centered when I go to church, in my being I just feel more anchored. I believe in God and the religion, but it has a different meaning for me then they teach. Well the church I went to always felt more spiritual then religious.
Today was a good day. Scratch that, it was amazing. Why? Because I got to spend time with my favorite kid at the nursery. I remember when he was tiny, a baby even, and now he's an adorable three year old. Just him smiling at me and giving me hugs was enough to send me into this state of contentment. I just felt...loved. Then the woman I work with made me an Easter basket with a little candy, a cute little bunny, and banana bread. It was so sweet of her, it almost made me cry. In a good way of course. I haven't felt like that on Easter in a long time. I haven't been with my family on Easter in years so it was nice to have a good day on this day since it is my favorite. I hope everyone else is having a good holiday. :)
When I got older and made the decison to attend church, Easter took on a new, spirital meaning. Which only further enhanced my love of it. Being in church during this holiday season just feels so good. I don't know why but it just feels more peaceful and warm. At least to me. I don't attend church now and I'm not a religious person perse but I miss the atmosphere. Having a place to collect all my thoughts and prays at. I also feel more centered when I go to church, in my being I just feel more anchored. I believe in God and the religion, but it has a different meaning for me then they teach. Well the church I went to always felt more spiritual then religious.
Today was a good day. Scratch that, it was amazing. Why? Because I got to spend time with my favorite kid at the nursery. I remember when he was tiny, a baby even, and now he's an adorable three year old. Just him smiling at me and giving me hugs was enough to send me into this state of contentment. I just felt...loved. Then the woman I work with made me an Easter basket with a little candy, a cute little bunny, and banana bread. It was so sweet of her, it almost made me cry. In a good way of course. I haven't felt like that on Easter in a long time. I haven't been with my family on Easter in years so it was nice to have a good day on this day since it is my favorite. I hope everyone else is having a good holiday. :)