fucking idiots.
I thought I hit a cat today but I didn't. Thank God. That would have been traumatic.
I feel like sleeping for a long time...longer than any person has ever slept. Then recording my dreams through some transmitter thingie and find out what's REALLY going on in my head. I've been thinkin some real fucked up shit lately. Mostly about life after school. The fact that I work a dead end little paying job right now without much hope of anything getting better after college. Partying is fun. But what about after? I don't want to be a dejected street bum that spends all her money on cat food, bad pot and Dubra while simultaneously whoring herself out to the masses at an alarming rate.
I'm at the point where I can't stand myself and everyone bothers me. I'm ashamed of a lot of shit. I'm sick of trying to impress people who think they are cool when in fact, they totally suck. Take one look at their pathetic existences and you'll understand why. Who this concerns is irrelevant.
The world tries to impress people like this. Perfectly good kids make fools out of themselves, make destructive choices and talk a lot of smack only to end up humiliated. Why? You're going to be a lot more than them someday. You'll walk all over them.
Remember the times when you lied and said you've been drunk before? Smoked pot before? "Almost" had sex before? Why lie? To make yourself look better for someone who sucks. They all suck.
I'm not going to try to make myself look experienced ever again. If it doesn't matter, I'm not going to talk about it. So what. Who fucking cares. No one needs to know about my life but me.
Last time I checked, polishing off 25 beers wasn't a GOOD thing. Its called being an alcoholic. Remember that.