I never meant to hurt you.
Last night I had to fight off the beginnings of an anxiety attack.
I'm finding it easier to have anxiety and panic attacks now that my graduation is looming in front of me the way the Water Tower does here in Ypsilanti.
I was upset because of the usual... my seemingly growing failure as an art student.
This semester in general has been met with a certain lackluster appeal. Aside from my Harry Potter children's lit course, I really wasn't all that thrilled for this semester. I should also mention that I went into this semester with anger, frustration, and anxiety. After the shit-tastic year I had for the 08-09 school year, I was less than eager to return. And in fact I contemplated leaving Eastern; I just wasn't enjoying school at all anymore and it was hurting me mentally and emotionally in ways I can't even comprehend. It just sucked.
And I'm not really enjoying this year either, academic-wise that is. I'm not really enjoying my art classes, nor the work that I am doing in them. I don't have the same excitement towards my classes that I once did. I feel like my work is shoddy... I'm not in love with it like I have been with past projects.
I'm not really excited for AIGA meetings and activities either. I just don't want to bother with them. And it worries me, because if I'm so...blasé about activities that are graphic design related now, what the hell am I going to do when I graduate?
I have 8 months to figure out what the hell I want to do with my life.
That's a bit demanding, no?
I'm finding it easier to have anxiety and panic attacks now that my graduation is looming in front of me the way the Water Tower does here in Ypsilanti.
I was upset because of the usual... my seemingly growing failure as an art student.
This semester in general has been met with a certain lackluster appeal. Aside from my Harry Potter children's lit course, I really wasn't all that thrilled for this semester. I should also mention that I went into this semester with anger, frustration, and anxiety. After the shit-tastic year I had for the 08-09 school year, I was less than eager to return. And in fact I contemplated leaving Eastern; I just wasn't enjoying school at all anymore and it was hurting me mentally and emotionally in ways I can't even comprehend. It just sucked.
And I'm not really enjoying this year either, academic-wise that is. I'm not really enjoying my art classes, nor the work that I am doing in them. I don't have the same excitement towards my classes that I once did. I feel like my work is shoddy... I'm not in love with it like I have been with past projects.
I'm not really excited for AIGA meetings and activities either. I just don't want to bother with them. And it worries me, because if I'm so...blasé about activities that are graphic design related now, what the hell am I going to do when I graduate?
I have 8 months to figure out what the hell I want to do with my life.
That's a bit demanding, no?