mid class musing over time equals muddled thought
I’m becoming afraid for myself.
I’m not supposed to think like this
not supposed to.
I’m not meant to love anymore.
But that is not so much the problem,
as is the problem off potential for such emotion.
Already I am falling in love with
your presence and constant passion.
I am falling in love with my desire to be with you
as a body, as a person.
As something more than an isolated, displaced mind.
I’m torn.
part of me is thinking - you can’t afford to keep this lifestyle up.
that may be true.
but isn’t this what I’ve always wanted?
physically, which is something I almost never seek out
or even accept once it’s arrived.
all I can think now is
she’s so beautiful…
I’m not supposed to think like this
not supposed to.
I’m not meant to love anymore.
But that is not so much the problem,
as is the problem off potential for such emotion.
Already I am falling in love with
your presence and constant passion.
I am falling in love with my desire to be with you
as a body, as a person.
As something more than an isolated, displaced mind.
I’m torn.
part of me is thinking - you can’t afford to keep this lifestyle up.
that may be true.
but isn’t this what I’ve always wanted?
physically, which is something I almost never seek out
or even accept once it’s arrived.
all I can think now is
she’s so beautiful…