It hurts why dose it hurt this bad? Why Cant I help? What should I do???
i am tiered out of medicine need more can't get it w/out an appointment and don't like the doctor i have to see to get it. Therefore b/c i'm out of med i'm depressed. Jessies having a bad day/days and isn't telling me whats going on and it's killing me!!! My mom's in a bad mood and I don't quite understand why I know we havn't been helping around the house enough lately but shes too upset for that to be just it. I think somthings going on at work that she's not telling me and like jessie's prob. It's killing me. i care about her soooooooooo much and hate the fact that she's in pain and is suffering And I can't do much of anything to help her with it. She's soo sad that somtimes at night she cries and that kills me and I cry and if eel soo helpless when i try to help her cuz I don't know what to do. I don't want her to be sad or in pain. All I want for her is for her to be happy and healthy. I'd take the pain away if i could I'd even suffer through it if it would make her feel better. Anything to make her feel better. I love her soo much and my heart is breaking to think that shes this sad and I could be one of the reasons why she's this sad. That kills me sooo much. I don't know what to do. I'm fine and all but my lifes still falling down around me and i can't stop it. Today i was asking my Mom if it was ok to thriugh stuff away from the collages I don't want and the collage in ? was Evansvill U. and she was all like you are not going there and my dad said whats wrong with it and she got all upset and said I don't want to hear about how she had the perfect collage experience there and I got raped at my collageand she's not going there. i hate my aunt for the fact that my mom gets soo upset about her life my mom's been through hell and my aunt gloats and rubs her "perfect" life into my Moms face all the time and makes my Mom feel like crap I hate her for it!! I HATE HER! i wish I could just hold my mom and wisk away the whole world and have it be just me and her and make all her troubles and cares go away. that's all i want to do. why can't i do it?? why cant i make her feel better?? I cant even tell her I feel like this cuz then she'll try to comfert me and make me feel better and I just want her to be happy and she'd get all upset about the fact that she's the reason I feel like this but I don't want her to do that! i want to help her like she's helped me. I don't need her to help me and I need to help her!! I'm soo confused and worried and upset and tiered and it hurts soooo bad. It just hurts.