Jan 01, 2005 11:02
525,600 minutes,
525,000 moments so dear
525,600 minutes,
how do you measure,
measure a year?
It all began when the ball dropped in times square at 12:00 am. I was in a van, driving to my home. I was staying at the Tierney home, and we slumped into bed later that morning. The next morning I awoke, and had a lovely breakfast with all of the Tierney women. It was wonderful to spend time with Lindsey's family. I'm glad I had that time, since it was my last oppritunity to do so. Two weeks later I got the phone call that changed my life. I wish that was just a dream.
February and March were difficult. My best friend was mourning her loss, along with the rest of the family and friends of Erin and Joe. Not only that, I was having trouble with my mother. After a week of seperation, we reconciled, and I returned home. That month could have broken my back, but I had the musical to distract me. That, and a little bit of weed. But it was never easy.
Spring finally came and hope grew. By then I had a new group of friends who I adored. I took a trip with the Tierney family to Atlanta, which was nice. Quality bonding time with Lindsey is always a good thing.
Summer was eventful. I finally started to behave like a teenager. Between summer school and days at my Nana's house, I was smoking weed, partying, having a great time. I was flying high, and it continued until school began. But it was one week in July that I'll never forget. I met my soul mate, or so I thought. I bonded with him so much, we talked every day about three times. I fell in love with him instantly, even though I didn't realize it. For a solid month it was just the two of us. With him I felt comfortable enough to share my heart, my mind, my soul, and my body. And then he left me behind.
After that, life lost meaning. I didn't care about anything, really, except for my boyfriend. But my broken heart took over all of my emotions and blinded me to everything else. I was even careless enough to bring weed to school and offer it to that bitch who ended up telling on me. You think you can trust people, then they just fuck you over. They'll pay in time, karma is a very strong thing.
After the end of everything, when I was finally allowed freedom, I got dumped. Harshly. No one has ever said anything like that to me before, and I don't think I'll ever fully get over that. I can't even think about him without wanting to cry. His words cut like a thousand knives.
I thought life was finally improving. Verdi and I were going to reunite, and I was so excited to hear him tell me how much he missed me and how he wanted to see me. I had butterflies in my stomach for about two weeks. I did so much to prepare for our reunion. I called him for directions the night before the trip to Ann Arbor, and he then told me he met someone. And she's so perfect, she gives him the feelings his ex once did. The feelings he never had for me. And I cried for a long time, and I still cry once in awhile. But God has answered my prayers and he's helping me heal. I have decided that it's time to let go, and if it comes back; it is mine. If it doesn't, I won't be suprised. I knew I'd lose him, it was just a matter of time. It's just embarassing when he couldn't care less. He'll always be my first love.
And so I will continue from when I left off. Kiss me goodbye, I'm Defying Gravity.
And nobody in all of Oz, no Wizard that there is or was, is *EVER* gonna bring me down.
~Lia