(no subject)
Everyone is going to get tired of reading my journal entries, because it's going to seem like all I am doing is complaining...lol
Roomie got home tonight and told us she didn't have a way to work tomorrow. That's cool...we only have one car. We have some bills we have to go out and pay tomorrow morning so she was told she had to be up and ready by 8:15. Immediate attitude. She went over to reheat her dinner and came back with this pissed off look on her face (what's new) and asked if the dog had been fed. The dog is my stepson's and because he (stepson...not dog...lol) gets picked up at 6:00 (supposed to be, but his father is always at least 30 minutes late) we don't have him feed the dog before he leaves (the dog is very hyper and we don't want my stepson to get dirty just before he leaves...lol). Anyhow, I said "No. The dog hasn't been fed yet and she gets this look on her face. I can't explain the look, but it's that look of extremely pissed off. When we first got the dog (about two years ago) she had said she will feed him when my stepson isn't here.
I'll be honest, I don't think she much likes my stepson anyway. Actually, that's not true. I think she likes him, but she just doesn't get along with him. A 30 year old acting like a child...go figure.
As she was sitting down to eat, Angyl had asked her if there was a DVD in the case that was under her HOT plate. She picked it up and set it to the side....didn't look and didn't answer.
Don't get me wrong. She's a good person and has a loving heart...she just has a lot of growing up to do. She also has a lot of issues. Listen to ME talking about issues. Yea, well, at least I am visably TRYING to overcome my issues. I also don't rely on anyone else to "make me feel better." Only I can do that. Only I can say..."You know what? I was NOT a bad kid. I did NOT deserve to get my ass kicked on an hourly basis." After three years of trying to help roomie, you think she would be able to stand on her own two feet. NOPE she's using (at least was up until about 6 months ago) mine and Angyl's feet.
We yanked our feet out from under hers 6 months ago and we are still looking at her laying on her back on the floor. I understand having a "self pity" day. We all deserve that every once in a while. But hers is every other day.
Yea yea...I know. I've thought the same thing. "Just kick her out. She'll get on her feet quickly." I would, but she's a waitress and barely making enough to pay her bills...not including her share of the food. So if we kicked her out she would go hungry and I won't wish that on my own father. Our next step is to move all of the furniture around and give her a "studio apartment". See. We have two kitchens, two bathrooms, etc. It was a duplex, remember? lol. :) If things don't change I will be making an executive decision (Angyl wears the pants in the family. You don't have to stand for long periods of time or bend over to be the head of the household. ;) We had that arrangement since she moved in. She explained that it's one of the very few things she can do that makes her feel like a viable part of the family. :) ) Anyhow. If something doesn't change soon, I will be making an executive decision and sectioning off part of the house that's "hers" and see if that gets her on her feet.
Unfortunately, if that doesn't work, I will have no choice but to ask her to leave. I really hate to even think that, but I have to look after myself, Angyl and my stepson first and foremost. Then I can do my "human duty" and look after my fellow "man".
Yea I know....I'm sometimes too nice for my own good, but I have been like this for several years. Perhaps it's from all of the abuse I suffered and I am running scard. Perhaps I am being a "pushover" so I don't slide back down that abuse hill. Sliding down is always faster than climbing. ;)
Anyhow. I'm done fumming. I'm going to have myself a smoke and go to bed. Bed is the only place to get away from the tension and I don't want my bleeding ulcer to "come back"...lol.
Roomie got home tonight and told us she didn't have a way to work tomorrow. That's cool...we only have one car. We have some bills we have to go out and pay tomorrow morning so she was told she had to be up and ready by 8:15. Immediate attitude. She went over to reheat her dinner and came back with this pissed off look on her face (what's new) and asked if the dog had been fed. The dog is my stepson's and because he (stepson...not dog...lol) gets picked up at 6:00 (supposed to be, but his father is always at least 30 minutes late) we don't have him feed the dog before he leaves (the dog is very hyper and we don't want my stepson to get dirty just before he leaves...lol). Anyhow, I said "No. The dog hasn't been fed yet and she gets this look on her face. I can't explain the look, but it's that look of extremely pissed off. When we first got the dog (about two years ago) she had said she will feed him when my stepson isn't here.
I'll be honest, I don't think she much likes my stepson anyway. Actually, that's not true. I think she likes him, but she just doesn't get along with him. A 30 year old acting like a child...go figure.
As she was sitting down to eat, Angyl had asked her if there was a DVD in the case that was under her HOT plate. She picked it up and set it to the side....didn't look and didn't answer.
Don't get me wrong. She's a good person and has a loving heart...she just has a lot of growing up to do. She also has a lot of issues. Listen to ME talking about issues. Yea, well, at least I am visably TRYING to overcome my issues. I also don't rely on anyone else to "make me feel better." Only I can do that. Only I can say..."You know what? I was NOT a bad kid. I did NOT deserve to get my ass kicked on an hourly basis." After three years of trying to help roomie, you think she would be able to stand on her own two feet. NOPE she's using (at least was up until about 6 months ago) mine and Angyl's feet.
We yanked our feet out from under hers 6 months ago and we are still looking at her laying on her back on the floor. I understand having a "self pity" day. We all deserve that every once in a while. But hers is every other day.
Yea yea...I know. I've thought the same thing. "Just kick her out. She'll get on her feet quickly." I would, but she's a waitress and barely making enough to pay her bills...not including her share of the food. So if we kicked her out she would go hungry and I won't wish that on my own father. Our next step is to move all of the furniture around and give her a "studio apartment". See. We have two kitchens, two bathrooms, etc. It was a duplex, remember? lol. :) If things don't change I will be making an executive decision (Angyl wears the pants in the family. You don't have to stand for long periods of time or bend over to be the head of the household. ;) We had that arrangement since she moved in. She explained that it's one of the very few things she can do that makes her feel like a viable part of the family. :) ) Anyhow. If something doesn't change soon, I will be making an executive decision and sectioning off part of the house that's "hers" and see if that gets her on her feet.
Unfortunately, if that doesn't work, I will have no choice but to ask her to leave. I really hate to even think that, but I have to look after myself, Angyl and my stepson first and foremost. Then I can do my "human duty" and look after my fellow "man".
Yea I know....I'm sometimes too nice for my own good, but I have been like this for several years. Perhaps it's from all of the abuse I suffered and I am running scard. Perhaps I am being a "pushover" so I don't slide back down that abuse hill. Sliding down is always faster than climbing. ;)
Anyhow. I'm done fumming. I'm going to have myself a smoke and go to bed. Bed is the only place to get away from the tension and I don't want my bleeding ulcer to "come back"...lol.