selfish?
So I got to thinking, am I a selfish person? Usually I would like to say no, but growing up, I think I have gotten to be a lot more selfish. I used to let friends borrow my possessions, whenever they wanted, whatever they wanted. But through college, I have been noticing that I am very protective with my belongings, I question if I should help someone else or let them borrow something minuscule. I now feel that since I care so much for my own possessions, that I have turned materialistic! Or I may just have realized the importance and real value of money and am just a stingy Asian. :P
But this thought of me being selfish gave me another thought, am I being selfish with my mom? During one of the MANY arguments I have been having with my mom, she pointed out that maybe I was jealous of Tracy. I refused! I would never be on the same level as Tracy to my mom, since I am her daughter, I would always be considered more superior to my mom then him. But my mom may have a point, but looking at the problem differently. I may be upset because for the past 7 years, I have practically had my mom all to myself. Austin definitely didn't talk to my mom, so it was just us, "just the two of us..." All of a sudden, my mom has someone new and I can't take it! Maybe it is because I am not used to sharing my mom since it has been so long. I know I can deal with it, since I have my friends and now mom has Tracy, but I just can't stand how they interact with each other still. Mom is totally love struck and practically drools all over him. She still tells him updates on me, which I absolutely hate! Therefore I have refused to talk to her, so that I can't tell her anything. I know that isn't fair and very immature, but I have brought up the issue before and she just keeps saying that this is who she shares everything with now so I have to deal with it. Well fine! If you want to play that way, I am not telling her anything! Dude, I am so immature at times. -_-
So in about two weeks I will be going back home for a mini break before real school starts. I hope that I can bridge the gap between my mom and I, but it is a two way business. We both gotta give and take a little. But for now "I just gotta get myself over me.." - the format
(if you couldn't tell, music usually dictates my life) :P
But this thought of me being selfish gave me another thought, am I being selfish with my mom? During one of the MANY arguments I have been having with my mom, she pointed out that maybe I was jealous of Tracy. I refused! I would never be on the same level as Tracy to my mom, since I am her daughter, I would always be considered more superior to my mom then him. But my mom may have a point, but looking at the problem differently. I may be upset because for the past 7 years, I have practically had my mom all to myself. Austin definitely didn't talk to my mom, so it was just us, "just the two of us..." All of a sudden, my mom has someone new and I can't take it! Maybe it is because I am not used to sharing my mom since it has been so long. I know I can deal with it, since I have my friends and now mom has Tracy, but I just can't stand how they interact with each other still. Mom is totally love struck and practically drools all over him. She still tells him updates on me, which I absolutely hate! Therefore I have refused to talk to her, so that I can't tell her anything. I know that isn't fair and very immature, but I have brought up the issue before and she just keeps saying that this is who she shares everything with now so I have to deal with it. Well fine! If you want to play that way, I am not telling her anything! Dude, I am so immature at times. -_-
So in about two weeks I will be going back home for a mini break before real school starts. I hope that I can bridge the gap between my mom and I, but it is a two way business. We both gotta give and take a little. But for now "I just gotta get myself over me.." - the format
(if you couldn't tell, music usually dictates my life) :P