All alone in a crowd...
"No one is glamorously lonely" - BSB
Two months and 5 days.
The past couple weeks have been tough. Annoying each other, not agreeing much, not wanting to show affection as much vs. him wanting to show affection 24/7... -shrug-
I said I wouldn't complain about this much anymore. I said I would try to keep it in as to not bother people with my relationship problems. However, I can't do that anymore. It's bugging me too much.
He's overly clingy. Always has to be RIGHT there touching me or practically sitting on me. If we're on opposite ends of the couch, he pouts. If we can't see each other one night, he pouts.
He also tries to drink his problems away. I dislike that. Drinking for entertainment and drinking to rid yourself of problems are two different things. Drinking to have a good time and drinking yourself into a drunken stupor is totally different.
We're supposed to go to California in August. Vacation time. It's supposed to be fun. However, I don't have fun with him much anymore. Honestly, when we hang out, it's rarely fun. When I want to go out without him he gets all depressed. I don't know what to do. I think I like him. However, I don't even know anymore. I'm horrible with emotions and relationships anyway. And I'm even worse at knowing when they're falling apart and what the hell I should do.
I'm afraid that maybe he's not the one. Maybe he's not right for me. I'm afraid that we're not meant to be together... Perhaps there's somebody better for me out there.
Maybe.. just maybe there's somebody that can be more of a best friend to me than anything. A best friend that I love to death.. a best friend that I enjoy kissing and showing affection to. Somebody that can have a good time without me.. and have just as much fun with me. Somebody that can take me out with the guys.. and isn't afraid to tell me how they REALLY feel about something.
Just maybe..... somewhere.
x-posted on myspace
Two months and 5 days.
The past couple weeks have been tough. Annoying each other, not agreeing much, not wanting to show affection as much vs. him wanting to show affection 24/7... -shrug-
I said I wouldn't complain about this much anymore. I said I would try to keep it in as to not bother people with my relationship problems. However, I can't do that anymore. It's bugging me too much.
He's overly clingy. Always has to be RIGHT there touching me or practically sitting on me. If we're on opposite ends of the couch, he pouts. If we can't see each other one night, he pouts.
He also tries to drink his problems away. I dislike that. Drinking for entertainment and drinking to rid yourself of problems are two different things. Drinking to have a good time and drinking yourself into a drunken stupor is totally different.
We're supposed to go to California in August. Vacation time. It's supposed to be fun. However, I don't have fun with him much anymore. Honestly, when we hang out, it's rarely fun. When I want to go out without him he gets all depressed. I don't know what to do. I think I like him. However, I don't even know anymore. I'm horrible with emotions and relationships anyway. And I'm even worse at knowing when they're falling apart and what the hell I should do.
I'm afraid that maybe he's not the one. Maybe he's not right for me. I'm afraid that we're not meant to be together... Perhaps there's somebody better for me out there.
Maybe.. just maybe there's somebody that can be more of a best friend to me than anything. A best friend that I love to death.. a best friend that I enjoy kissing and showing affection to. Somebody that can have a good time without me.. and have just as much fun with me. Somebody that can take me out with the guys.. and isn't afraid to tell me how they REALLY feel about something.
Just maybe..... somewhere.
x-posted on myspace