Wednesday
Dear friend,
I lay on my back in the dark, phone propped to my right ear. I listen as he fills me in on his day. Then, he rambles...and I love it. I smile to myself even though the "mmhmm's..." leaving my lips would portray otherwise. He talks and talks -- some words sweet, some words, well...not so sweet, but that's him...and I love it.
He tells me about a friend who is embarking on a new relationship, followed by a sentence which proves our own level of comfort with each other. For the moment, I feel jealous. Jealous that, while we are still learning about one another, the very beginning is behind us. And just for that moment, I missed the uncertainty of it all -- and the impressing and the excitement that comes with it. But then he makes me laugh. He always does...and I love it.
Our conversation is close to an end. That fleeting jealousy is removed. And I know that even as I was expressing it to him, I would never want to exchange what he have now for the anxious occasions of before.
As he continues to talk, I listen to his voice and think. There is absolutely nothing about him that I would ever want to change. There is absolutely nothing about us that I would ever want to change. He may anger me from time to time, but we are only human, after all. And I truly do love everything about him. I don't think I've ever loved in such a complete way. And even in our disagreements, I think of my life since he's been in it and it's good...and I love it.
We begin to say our goodbyes. My wandering thoughts fade as I know the night is close to an end. Again, another comment simply proving how broken in we are. At first, I find myself saying, "If we had just met you wouldn't have said..."
Then, he makes me laugh. He always does...and I love it.
Then, he tells me he loves me. He always does...and I love him, too.
I lay on my back in the dark, phone propped to my right ear. I listen as he fills me in on his day. Then, he rambles...and I love it. I smile to myself even though the "mmhmm's..." leaving my lips would portray otherwise. He talks and talks -- some words sweet, some words, well...not so sweet, but that's him...and I love it.
He tells me about a friend who is embarking on a new relationship, followed by a sentence which proves our own level of comfort with each other. For the moment, I feel jealous. Jealous that, while we are still learning about one another, the very beginning is behind us. And just for that moment, I missed the uncertainty of it all -- and the impressing and the excitement that comes with it. But then he makes me laugh. He always does...and I love it.
Our conversation is close to an end. That fleeting jealousy is removed. And I know that even as I was expressing it to him, I would never want to exchange what he have now for the anxious occasions of before.
As he continues to talk, I listen to his voice and think. There is absolutely nothing about him that I would ever want to change. There is absolutely nothing about us that I would ever want to change. He may anger me from time to time, but we are only human, after all. And I truly do love everything about him. I don't think I've ever loved in such a complete way. And even in our disagreements, I think of my life since he's been in it and it's good...and I love it.
We begin to say our goodbyes. My wandering thoughts fade as I know the night is close to an end. Again, another comment simply proving how broken in we are. At first, I find myself saying, "If we had just met you wouldn't have said..."
Then, he makes me laugh. He always does...and I love it.
Then, he tells me he loves me. He always does...and I love him, too.