The Rules
I like that song, been on a Meat Loaf trip lately after I found some of Bill's old CD's which were his favorite mixes of Meat Loaf. Then Bat Out of Hell III came out last week (Though I've had it since the start of October) so tbats wbere tbat comes from.
It's been a LONG day. When I went to work today I had no idea it would be as hectic and busy as it was. I spent almost the entire day on the damn food prep line, not because we were busy, but because I had no fucking choice since the two line people we had couldn't keep up with the flow worth a good goddam. It makes me terrified for Black Friday. I feel like I'm gonna be fucked.
Have you ever felt as if you are the only one who knows how to do their fucking job?
And the fucking people... fuck all of the goddam stupid moron people in the fucking world. I'm going to kill all of you and shove my fucking ballsack down you goddam throats. Alright... here is a short list of things that you SHOULD NOT do if you don't want me to do something fucked up and disgusting to your food.
1.) DO NOT fucking treat me like a piece of shit because I work for Taco Bell. Respect me and get respected. If it wasnt for people like me who take people like you's shit all the fucking time you wouldn't fucking have Taco Bell you stupid motherfuckers
2.) DO NOT send your fucking dumbass kids up to my counter to order then (when your order gets screwed up because your retard downs syndrome child orders something you didn't want) come up and yell @ ME for it. Fuck you. If you weren't such a fat lazy asshole maybe you could come up and order so it's right the first time. Die. Suck my fucking balls until they turn red and swollen fuckface.
3.) DO NOT put your goddam reciept with your order number in you fucking purse. When I have to spend 5 minutes waiting for you to pull out you receipt to make SURE that this is YOUR tray of food that you ordered THIRTY SECONDS AGO because you can't seem to remember what you ordered even when I describe EXACTLY what is on the tray. Fuck you. We give you a number for a reason.
4.) GET OFF YOUR FUCKING CELL PHONE TO ORDER! If ONE MORE PERSON comes up and is talking on their phone and ordered at the same time I WILL take it from you, tape it to my boot, and shove my boot so far in your ass when you open your mouth you'll hear that stupid fucking chirp shit.
5.) DO NOT assume that the order I place down that looks similar to yours is your tray. READ THE ORDER NUMBER {See Rule #3) Some people like a bean burrito and soft taco as well... however, when you grab miss "I don't like onions" tray and she takes yours and comes back to BITCH because she didn't pay attention to her order number (Rule #3) and got a burrito with onions.... then I have to remake it... Fuck you... just fuck you.
6.) Teenagers who fucking wait by the counter in a group of people for food they might like then run off with the tray once it gets to the counter... I WILL FIND YOU FUCKS! Then I'll stab you in the chest while I'm forcing you to consume your own feces! Die... before I kill you.
6a.) Teenagers who think that they are the first people to come up with getting a free water cup and using it for soda. You aren't that smooth. people have been doing this since the beginning of self-serve soda. And I'M WATCHING YOU! I WILL leave the store and make you pay for it. And if you don't, I'll have you removed from my mall. Fuck off.
6b.) Teenagers who think they are tough shit cause they are high class @ school. I will cut you. I carry three knives on my person at all times. If you want to challenge me to a fight after work I WILL cut you. I'll fuck your shit up so badly they'll need to use your fucking teeth to identify your body. I have very little to lose anymore. Bring it on fuckers.
7.) Old people - If you cannot function properly without someone escorting you DO NOT LEAVE YOUR FUCKING INTERNMENT/RETIREMENT CAMP! I'm so sick and tired of you fucking people coming up, not knowing what you want and take 10 minutes to order... THEN DIGGING IN YOUR PURSE FOR EXACT CHANGE. I hereby vote that we exterminate all the elderly... and the canadians.
8.) HAVE YOUR MONEY READY WHEN YOU ORDER! Fucking people wasting my time and hurtin my Speed of Service because you have to dig in your fucking huge stupid purses for a few bucks because you are too moronic to have your money ready when you get to the counter.
9.) KNOW WHAT YOU WANT WHEN YOU GET TO THE COUNTER! if you are standing in line for more than 5 minutes talking, and you get to my register not knowing what you want then I WILL send you to the back of the line and help the next person. I did it three times today. Don't test me fuckers.
10.) Canadians - GO HOME. Taco Bell does NOT... DOES NOT... have fucking fries in America. That is ONLY in Canada. FUCK YOU. If it isn't on my menu then we don't FUCKING carry it. How hard is that to understand? And ARGUING WITH ME about why we should have it isn't going to make them magically appear. All you are doing is wasting my time and bringing youself close and closer to death.
Alright, that's enough for right now... probably will have more in the future. However, I want you to remember those simple rules, so when anyone breaks them and you find me craming my fist down your gullet to remove your fucking spleen through your throat you'll know why.
And... always remember:
