Prom Butterflies
Yea. Shelly is going to prom with me. I was sick during the ticket sales, not to mention I didn't have any money to buy them. I went to Miss Beck yesterday to try and get some and she was a jerk to me. I go "Hey, Miss Beck, I was wondering if I could please purchase some prom tickets." She goes "No! It is past deadline! No!" And I explained to her how I was sick for a while and that I didn't have a chance to get any. She denied me them again, so explained how I already bought everything, that it is my Senior prom, how much it means to me with everything going on in my life right now, and that I would do anything if she could just sell me 2 tickets. I was very polite, and tried to remain calm. She was an a$$hole again. Really mean, spippy...just a jerk. She told me she's not giving me any, but there is a prom committee meeting that night and that she'd bring it up. The bell rang so I had to go to Econ. I took a test, then went up to the office to call my dad. He has "a way" with people. Ha. Yea. The office lady wouldn't let me call w/out telling the principal what my "issue" was. I went to Mr. Bender's office and told him what had happened with Miss Beck. He was really sweet. He told me to try and relax. He'd take care of it. Miss Beck was probably just overstressed and that she'd come around. That he'd talk to her. He left for a second, then came back. He sent me to Mr. Lever, 'cause he stopped him. He talked to me. Shot down pretty much everything I said. Said it was my fault that I didn't get them. Blah blah blah. Told me "I don't know why you waited so long...I don't Know it you really were absent...Miss Beck is right. I'll go talk to her, but I know what the outcome will be." I got upset. I told him I wanted to call my dad. He goes "No. You need to get to class!" I told him I was in a study hall and "would you rather me go back this second and be really messed up all day, or would you rather me take 2 minutes and call my dad so that I feel a little better. The day will be a waste if I go back now. I can't concentrate. I'm not talking straight. Which would you rather?" He goes. "Ok. Under 2 conditions. I am not going to have a parent conference over this. Ok? And I'm not letting you go home." I agreed and he asked if I'd like him to step out. I said yes and talked to my dad. He threatend to call a Lesbian Rights Organization and come in and tell off Miss Beck. He said he was coming a little bit before 3pm. He was really pissed. He told me not to worry about it... that he'd take care of it. The whole time Mr. Lever stood right outside the door, almost against it. I know he heard half of what I was saying because the walls are thin. (Nicole just came and sat next to me. It's cool because a bunch of people came in before her and sat on the other side of the room. She didn't. She sat right next to me. Yea, the people that came in are the same people that have been talking trash behind my back all year and she has stuck up for me. She is really cool. Her sister is a Lesbian, too. I dunno. It was just cool :) So, yea. I got off of the phone with my dad and went to class. Shelly didn't seem too upset about the whole thing. She looked at me like I was crazy for being so upset. The prom means so much to me. I get to get dressed up all pretty and look beautful- go with the woman I love. Have her dress all up and look gorgeous. It just means a lot. It signifies a lot, too. We are going away, too, after prom. We are going to get a place down in the beach and just "be" together- away from all of the assholes..away from all of the problems. It is going to be amazing. I cannot wait. So, it means a lot to me for many individual reasons- not just that it is my "senior prom." She didn't (doesn't?) get it. I felt really dumb and worse than I was already feeling. We went through the day and I had 8th pd. with her. I tried to be happy for her. I didn't want to bring her down and I wanted to make myself better- sometimes if I act like everything is ok, after a while I'll actually believe it. I tried. *sigh* Yea. She left. I dunno. I was still sad about the whole thing inside. I got called to the office- Mr. Lever again. Blah. We yelled at each other. He said someting about a fire hazard and "bad news". I didn't hear much of what he was saying- kind of tuned him out. I hate him. I liked him better over at Garden Spott. His head has gotten a little big with the whole "Assistant Principal" title. Yea. You are no different Mr. Lever. I left. Went home and made Shelly a sandwich (she was in detention) and a drink. She had to do right from detention to work, and I figured she would be hungry. I raced up to the school and picked her up. I handed her the sandwich and she was like "Um. Thanks..." She got in and I took her to work. The manager was like "I wanna talk to you before you're ride leaves." He fired her. Apparently, the store over near Sears closed and they had to hire all of the people from there and didn't have a place for her anymore. So we went home and she read me her journal. She was pissed at me earlier in the day for being so upset. She wrote a poem 2nd period about me (a good one). She was having some major mood swings all day. It got better. We talked. We had to go over to my work so that I could get validated. OOOOOOoooooo! I got prom tickets from Tina. She wants to sell them. She won them! Yay. I'm going to prom. I was soo scared that I couldn't go. That would have REALLY sucked. BUT I"M GOING!!! Weeee! "I believe that love is the answer. I believe that love will find a way..."
I believe in you...~Jillian
I believe in you...~Jillian