Generally Untitled, wherein I whine about my knee
This weekend was the 52nd Annual Shrimp Festival.
We wanted to attend, but couldn't. See, my knee just won't cooperate and respond to the current treatment of taking prescription strength Aleve twice a day and that's all.
I can do yard work, house work, drive a stick (though not without some pain and discomfort), but I can't walk for any distance greater than about half a block. Some days, if I can manage to not bend my left leg at all, I kinda forget that my knee is very bad, and will attempt grocery shopping without a ride on cart. Unfortunately, I never make it more than half way through the store before the pain starts making me question my own existence.
It's not just pain in my knee, though. The pain starts in my knee, but within minutes my entire left leg, from my waist to the bottom of my foot, is just SCREAMING in pain. Nothing stops that pain train once it leaves the station. I could at that point sit, but the pain would still be there. On a scale from one to ten, after the initial spike of a serious 9.5+, it settles into a seven. That's just three notches down from screaming and writhing on the floor.
And nothing but waiting it out makes it stop.
I have no idea what's causing this issue. I've gone about a year ago to see about my left leg, was prescribed physical therapy and a cortisone shot. It worked at that time, for a little while. I had even almost forgotten about that time. I had an MRI of that knee done, and there was some tiny meniscal tears, mild osteo-arthritis, and signs of early rheumatoid arthritis.
It didn't hurt as much then or as frequently as it does now, though.
Sometimes it hurts so bad now, for so long, that I sincerely wish that my left leg would just fall off so I could get a prosthetic limb and go about my life, business as usual.
I don't generally cry about pain. I'll bitch and moan, sure, but not actual tears.\
Last Sunday, I was working on the garden, stumbled just right, and my knee bent. Dude, I cried and yelled so hard, it hurt so much, I actually got dry heaves. It wasn't JUST that my knee hurt more than anything I could remember. It also meant that I couldn't keep on doing something I was seriously enjoying. I loved the feeling of building the garden. I had just started that day's chores. I was heartbroken, not that it hurt, but that I now couldn't get dirt under my fingernails.
The last time I got really sidelined was in the sixth grade. Our school had a spring field day, where we competed against each other in track and field events. I was signed up for almost every event, representing my classroom. One week before we were to have Field Day, I broke all of the bones in the arch of my foot. All of them. Not a single one was not broken like a green twig. How I did it was so stupid, I can't believe that it happened. I was babysitting the neighbor's kids, and we were outside playing with their puppy. I was wearing flip flops, because of course I was. I just happened to step right into a mole hole, didn't notice it as I was chasing the puppy around the yard, and my foot stayed there while I tried to keep on going. There was a sick crunch, and suddenly I couldn't put any weight on that foot at all. Called my folks to come check it out by the fence, and even before Dad could get to the fence, my entire foot turned black.
As calmly as my Dad could, he grabbed me, put me in the car and told Mom to call the neighbors and to bring the girls over to our house.
I didn't once cry from the pain. Instead, I cried when the doctor said I was to be completely off my foot for no less than a month. I explained my plans, and he said "No, Ma'am. No Way, Jose'. Nothing doing. You are going to have to sit this one out, sorry. You can't even walk, never mind run, jump, and all that other stuff. Here are the crutches, be careful on them."
I can tolerate many things. Being told to not do stuff in the spring time, as the earth awakens from her slumber, is pure torture to me. I cannot STAND to be sitting around. I have things to do, and dammit, I'm going to do them.
Except, of course, walk through downtown Fernandina Beach for Shrimp Festival this year.
We wanted to attend, but couldn't. See, my knee just won't cooperate and respond to the current treatment of taking prescription strength Aleve twice a day and that's all.
I can do yard work, house work, drive a stick (though not without some pain and discomfort), but I can't walk for any distance greater than about half a block. Some days, if I can manage to not bend my left leg at all, I kinda forget that my knee is very bad, and will attempt grocery shopping without a ride on cart. Unfortunately, I never make it more than half way through the store before the pain starts making me question my own existence.
It's not just pain in my knee, though. The pain starts in my knee, but within minutes my entire left leg, from my waist to the bottom of my foot, is just SCREAMING in pain. Nothing stops that pain train once it leaves the station. I could at that point sit, but the pain would still be there. On a scale from one to ten, after the initial spike of a serious 9.5+, it settles into a seven. That's just three notches down from screaming and writhing on the floor.
And nothing but waiting it out makes it stop.
I have no idea what's causing this issue. I've gone about a year ago to see about my left leg, was prescribed physical therapy and a cortisone shot. It worked at that time, for a little while. I had even almost forgotten about that time. I had an MRI of that knee done, and there was some tiny meniscal tears, mild osteo-arthritis, and signs of early rheumatoid arthritis.
It didn't hurt as much then or as frequently as it does now, though.
Sometimes it hurts so bad now, for so long, that I sincerely wish that my left leg would just fall off so I could get a prosthetic limb and go about my life, business as usual.
I don't generally cry about pain. I'll bitch and moan, sure, but not actual tears.\
Last Sunday, I was working on the garden, stumbled just right, and my knee bent. Dude, I cried and yelled so hard, it hurt so much, I actually got dry heaves. It wasn't JUST that my knee hurt more than anything I could remember. It also meant that I couldn't keep on doing something I was seriously enjoying. I loved the feeling of building the garden. I had just started that day's chores. I was heartbroken, not that it hurt, but that I now couldn't get dirt under my fingernails.
The last time I got really sidelined was in the sixth grade. Our school had a spring field day, where we competed against each other in track and field events. I was signed up for almost every event, representing my classroom. One week before we were to have Field Day, I broke all of the bones in the arch of my foot. All of them. Not a single one was not broken like a green twig. How I did it was so stupid, I can't believe that it happened. I was babysitting the neighbor's kids, and we were outside playing with their puppy. I was wearing flip flops, because of course I was. I just happened to step right into a mole hole, didn't notice it as I was chasing the puppy around the yard, and my foot stayed there while I tried to keep on going. There was a sick crunch, and suddenly I couldn't put any weight on that foot at all. Called my folks to come check it out by the fence, and even before Dad could get to the fence, my entire foot turned black.
As calmly as my Dad could, he grabbed me, put me in the car and told Mom to call the neighbors and to bring the girls over to our house.
I didn't once cry from the pain. Instead, I cried when the doctor said I was to be completely off my foot for no less than a month. I explained my plans, and he said "No, Ma'am. No Way, Jose'. Nothing doing. You are going to have to sit this one out, sorry. You can't even walk, never mind run, jump, and all that other stuff. Here are the crutches, be careful on them."
I can tolerate many things. Being told to not do stuff in the spring time, as the earth awakens from her slumber, is pure torture to me. I cannot STAND to be sitting around. I have things to do, and dammit, I'm going to do them.
Except, of course, walk through downtown Fernandina Beach for Shrimp Festival this year.