Fic: Dustbowl Dance (Dean/Castiel/Jimmy)

[thunder_nari]

Title: Dustbowl Dance
Author: thunder_nari
Fandom/Genre: AU Western
Pairing(s): Dean/Castiel/Jimmy
Rating: R
Word Count: 11, 735
Warnings: Underage sex (Dean is 17). Incest. Character death.

Artist: caz2y5
Art link: Art Masterlist

Summary: Dean and Sam live alone on the edges of a no-name western town after the death of their parents. While 17 year old Dean struggles to keep them both in home and food, Cas and Jimmy - notorious criminals - ride town to town leaving chaos in their wake. Dean never expected them to ride to his town.

Thanks to slartibartfast for the awesome beta. *hugs*


Dustbowl Dance
**

The Twins ride on matching horses. Black in the dim light but catch the sun right and they’re a deep red bay. The sun glosses off their coats and toned muscles. Their feet are hard because the Twins ride them that way. They can rip across the desert faster than the stagecoaches, faster than the Pony Express riders ever could. You can tell a lot about a man from the horse they ride.

Dean thinks it’s just about the greatest thing ever.

His own horse is tired and old; a dirty gray that pulls the cart Dean loads up every month with supplies for the barn. Metal to forge into horseshoes or any manner of things. Dean pretty much focuses on the horseshoes. This is a no name settlement in the middle of nothing, far off the map from anything decent but still well on the way to San Francisco. Dean sees his fair share of traffic, dusty men on sweaty horses with their shoes worn past the toe.

Dean does good business. He gets by.

It's enough to feed his old horse and to keep the run-down cabin on the edge of town. To pay rent on the liveries and give himself the space he needs to do his work. To keep his brother fed and in decent health after their dad went down in a drunken bar brawl.

Dean spends his days earning the calluses on his hands and the dirt ground into the lines of his skin. Too many lines for seventeen, but mom and dad had both left him too early to fend for himself, and that's why he spends the nights wishing.

Another wanted poster came through the town today. Hung up at the jail and at the bank and at the general store. Dead or Alive. Dean bets dead is preferred but it’s not gonna happen. Doesn’t matter if the world knows them, not a single person in this town is gonna be willing to raise their hands to the Twins, and what would they wanna come through here for anyway? They wouldn’t find much to rob here.

Cas and Jimmy.

There's an old wanted poster that he keeps hidden in his room and he looks over it. Jimmy peers up from under the rim of his hat, a serious sort of mischievousness lurking in his gaze. Cas stares straight out at the camera and dares whoever is on the other side to take a step forward. They’re amazing.

Dean can picture in his mind the way the dust kicks up trails that follow their horse’s hooves. No one out-rides them. No one out-fights them. Out-shoots them. Nothing. They’re at the top of the damn world. Better than that? They’re doing it together. Dean pictures he and Sammy like that. Riding across the lands, taking in money on a pair of good horses, and there’s no worry about the next meal. There’s no worry about what to do when Sammy gets sick because Sammy doesn’t get sick. No one is going to come kick them off their land because their land will be everywhere.

Every night it's the same. Dean thinks of this amazing life, and every morning he picks up before dawn, makes Sammy breakfast, and goes into town to hammer nails into tired horses' hooves. Day to day, he goes through the same routine. He works all day, goes home for lunch, swings by the saloon or the general store or the bank in the evening.

Anna is always there to greet him when he puts his day’s earnings into the bank. She has a smile just for him and her red locks curl around her shoulders and beg Dean to run his fingers through them. He does. He takes her, sometimes, around the back, with her skirts around her thighs and her back against the rough wood wall. Her daddy would nail Dean to that wall if he ever found out but Dean likes to pretend he lives on the edge.

People in the town all know him by name and he knows them the same. They don’t think much of him, one way or another. They say hi and they treat him nice but that’s as far as it goes. Dean’s just sort of there, he fills a service but what they really want is his dad. John was good with a gun and better with a horse. He could stop a brawl in its tracks until that last one finally got the better of him.

But Dean’s good with a gun. And give him the right horse, he could ride rings around his dad. He could probably join the army. Ride as a messenger between towns. Instead, he’s here, because Sammy can’t do it on his own and Dean promised he’d look after the kid.

Here is currently bent over with horseshoe nails clamped between his lips, a mare’s leg held tight between his knees as he hammers a shoe into place. He knows someone is there watching him but they don’t say anything so Dean doesn’t react. He finishes what he’s doing, sets the shoe and lets the mare’s leg down easy. He pats her shoulder, tells her she’s good before he turns to face the silent watcher.

“Yeah?” But he stops dead when standing right in front of him and holding the reins of two blood bay horses is Jimmy. Dean feels his jaw fall open. From under the low rim of his hat, Jimmy’s eyes bore into his, open and blue as the skies. Dean flicks his gaze around reflexively but the only other person around is standing in the livery stall doors, looking away. It’s the other Twin.

“Hey,” Jimmy greets, amused and patient and Dean clamps his jaw shut in embarrassment. “We need these horses looked after.”

“Uh…okay.” Dean looks back to the other Twin - Cas - again but Cas is staring out the doors, a dark silhouette against the sun. Dean’s acting like a swooning barmaid and he squares his shoulders up, stares back into Jimmy’s bright eyes. “I don’t work for free, though.”

That makes Jimmy laugh and in turn, Cas looks over, gaze boring down into Dean. “No problem.” Jimmy switches the reins into one hand and reaches into the pocket of his worn canvas jacket. He withdraws a couple of coins and holds them out, dropping them into Dean’s upturned palm when Dean reaches for them. “You can have the rest after you’re finished.”

“Yeah, okay then.”

Jimmy hands the reins over to Dean who grasps them tightly. “When you’re done, you can take them into the livery. We’re paid up here for a few days so don’t worry about that.”

“You’re staying?”

Jimmy nods. “That’s right.” He laughs and for a second Dean thinks he’s about to get his hair ruffled and he blushes. “Don’t be afraid, kid. This is just a layover. Call it a vacation.”

“I’m seventeen,” Dean immediately complains and the look Jimmy gives him really does make him feel like a child.

“Jimmy!” Dean jumps at the sharp voice and looks to find Cas still watching them. “Quit harassing him.”

Jimmy grins and leans in towards Dean a bit. “Do a good job on the horses; we’ll be checking them over later.”

“I always do,” Dean replies indignant and he’s left feeling beyond out of his depth as he watches the Twins walk away from him.

**

Dean heads home when afternoon rolls around, to see that Sammy is fine and to gather himself something to eat. Sam keeps the house in shape while Dean works. He keeps it liveable, he does dishes and feeds the few chickens they keep and the horse. He has lunch ready for Dean and he listens carefully while Dean tells him in enthusiastic detail about the Twins

“There’s a reward on them.”

Dean pauses with his mouth full of bread and swallows it down, the dryness making his throat ache. “What?”

“A reward. For turning them in.”

Dean snorts. “Right. So, how did you plan on catching them and then actually holding them in one spot for long enough? Come on, Sam, even the Sheriff here ain’t dumb enough to try that.”

“Dead or alive. And the sheriff here is a two bit coward.”

“No one’s stupid enough to try that either. Shut up and eat.”

Dean had considered it briefly, once. A long time ago, looking at the Twin’s wanted poster and the reward money and thinking about how that would allow him and Sammy to live comfortable for awhile. Shoot the Twins and collect. Dean is a good shot. But not as good as the Twins and no one had ever gotten the drop on them yet. Dean can’t risk it and when it comes down to it, he finds himself oddly reluctant. Especially now, after having Jimmy standing right in front of him.

Jimmy had been shorter than him. Dean hadn’t expected that.

He finishes up lunch and leaves Sam to clean up but Sam insists on following him back. He’s twelve now, he could work at the general store, sweeping up and doing the chores maybe. Dean gives in to this conversation they’ve had a dozen times over the last week alone, not so sure about letting Sam into town while the Twins are there but Jimmy had said it was just a layover. They weren’t here to make trouble and Dean believes him.

He leaves Sam at the general store and heads back to the livery. The Twins' horses are done but he has another waiting for him. When he steps into the dim light of the stables, the first thing he notices is Jimmy sitting on a straw bale near the hot coals of the fire that Dean will need to stoke up again. Jimmy gets to his feet when Dean steps in and Dean’s heart pounds a little to think that Jimmy was waiting for him.

“I checked the horses,” Jimmy says. “They look good. I owe you this.” He holds out his hand and Dean steps closer. A few more coins fall into his open palm, more than he usually charges. “Call it a tip. There’s more, if you come with me.”

Dean looks up from staring at the money in his hand. “What?”

“I want you,” Jimmy says, slow and with a lilt to his voice that makes Dean distinctly uncomfortable, “To come with me. Forget your job,” Jimmy interrupts before Dean can object. “I’ll pay you double whatever you make on a good day.”

“If I come with you.”

“Yes.”

“Uh…” This is a horrible terrible idea. Dean thinks about the fact that Jimmy is a thief, that he and his brother have killed people. But surely they were never the ones who started waving bullets around and he finds himself saying “Okay” before he can get the hell out of there.

“Good.” Jimmy smiles and in the face of it, Dean’s doubts fall away. He follows Jimmy through the livery, to the staircase at the end of the line of stalls that leads up into the house and the rooms at the Inn. Dean’s heart still pounds, excited and nervous with no idea what Jimmy is leading him to. All he knows is that these are the Twins and in Dean’s dreams, they lead him aside like this and offer him a place. Something Dean hasn’t known in more than a year, a sense of belonging and actually being able to take care of his little brother.

Jimmy takes him to one of the small rooms, produces a key and unlocks the door. The room isn’t what Dean would have expected, even if he knows well enough that it’s the best the Inn has to offer. It isn’t good enough. It’s small and dusty and the boards under their feet creak. Jimmy ushers him in, his hand on Dean’s shoulder where it stays while Dean takes in the room.

“Cas?” Jimmy calls into the room and Cas emerges from the small balcony. His shirt is off and his hat. There’s a cigarette dangling between his lips and his sharp eyes focus on Dean with an intensity that makes Dean want to back out of the room. He stays firmly put and meets that stare.

“You’re Dean,” Cas finally says and his voice is much deeper than his brothers and far less inviting. It sends a chill up Dean’s spine. “I’m Cas.”

“Yeah, I know. I don’t know what I’m doing here though.”

Cas shoots his gaze to Jimmy; eyes’ narrowing but Jimmy isn’t phased at all, stepping from Dean’s side to Cas's. He takes the cigarette from Cas’s mouth and draws on it himself. Then he leans forward and closes his mouth over his brothers to blow the smoke back to him. Dean blinks hard once as his mouth dries to the sight, to a slow realization, and he takes a half-step back. The door is still open behind him.

The twins don’t notice his sudden bolting nerves. Cas locks his hand around the back of Jimmy’s neck and hauls him in and Dean can’t tear his eyes away. He can see when Jimmy opens his mouth to Cas’s tongue because Jimmy sags just a little and Dean feels his own knees want to follow suit. They part with a little cloud of smoke between them and Cas pins Dean again under his gaze.

“We would appreciate it, Dean, if you would spend the evening with us.”

“Um.”

“You can say no, of course, we won’t keep you here.”

“I uh… Why?”

“Cas liked the look of you,” Jimmy answers.

Cas parts from Jimmy and Jimmy stays back as Cas approaches him. He tries not to flinch when Cas’s hand rests on his chest and Dean’s heart pounds away beneath it. Cas is also the smallest bit shorter than him and Dean takes a deep breath, Cas’s hand rising and falling with the movement. “I like that you meet my eyes.” And he doesn’t break their eye contact when he leans in and brushes his mouth across Dean’s startled lips.

“I'm not a whore,” Dean manages to force out. “But you can find a couple down at the saloon.” He doesn’t know why he’s arguing, doesn’t know why he doesn’t turn and walk out the door. Except that Cas is pushing his fingers up along Dean’s throat and the light stubble from a couple days spent not shaving.

“I don't want a whore. So it's good that you aren't one. If it helps you, we won't pay.”

Dean is frozen to the spot, body and mind; he doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know. Cas keeps looking at him, waiting, but when Dean doesn’t react, he slides his hand around to the back of Dean’s neck. Like he had done to his brother only a moment ago, Cas locks his hand there and draws Dean against him, draws their mouths tight together and Dean breathes sharp through his nose.

Somewhere over the roaring in his ears, he hears the door clicking shut and his heart speeds on and his stomach tightens and somehow, he’s kissing Cas back without even realizing it. Cas’s mouth is dry, his beard catches along Dean’s and his hands are calloused where they stroke at Dean’s neck. His mouth, when he parts Dean’s lips, is smoky with the tobacco.

Cas kisses Dean until Dean’s heart settles, until he’s not just kissing back but pushing back, and that’s when Jimmy whispers against Dean’s ear and Dean startles as he remembers Jimmy’s presence.

“You done this sort of thing before?” Jimmy’s voice is smooth and alluring and Dean gasps a breath as Jimmy’s hands reach around to slide down the front of Dean’s thighs, framing his crotch.

“Sure.” Dean tries to put some bravado behind it but when he goes on and it’s met with soft laughter from Jimmy and an amused eye crinkle from Cas, he wishes he’d kept his mouth shut. “With the banker’s daughter.” And somehow, tight curls and a sweet mouth don’t hold a candle to Cas’s hard lips or Jimmy’s experienced hands.

Jimmy works Dean free from his torn denim jeans and closes a warm dry hand tight around his shaft. “God,” shudders out of Dean and Jimmy laughs again. He presses up behind Dean and Dean can feel an answering hardness pressed against his backside that turns his mouth dry all over again and makes his knees feel weak.

“Don’t worry,” Jimmy assures him, mouth against Dean’s ear. “We’re just gonna play a bit. Nothing too far.”

Dean nods, throat bobbing on a hard swallow and he looks between the Twins with wide eyes. This had never been in his fantasies. It might have been in his dreams, waking up hard and wet, embarrassed with Sam in the bed across the room from him. There’s no room for embarrassment when Jimmy’s hand strokes smoothly along his dick, in time with his own hitching thrusts against Dean’s backside.

Cas is still in front of him and Dean stares into the depths of his eyes until Cas breaks first with a moan and drags them together to the bed. Where clothes are lost and Dean is surrounded by hard bodies and their hard hands and mouths and cocks. Where they stroke and suck him to edges Dean’s never accomplished with the quick ruts against the wall of the bank with Anna.

Afterward, the twins share lazy smoke filled kisses over a cigarette and Dean rests boneless on the bed he never would have figured so comfortable. There’s a knock at the door and a call for dinner. Dean recognizes the voice as the barmaid from the tavern below.

Jimmy hauls himself up and over to the door, mindless that he’s still bare-chested and his jeans are hanging low. Dean doubts that Tessa will mind, either. When Dean takes his eyes from the sight, he finds Cas is staring at him again. The stares make Dean uncomfortable, like Cas is searching for something in them or reading more than Cas has any right to, but Dean doesn’t back down from it. “Will you join us for dinner?” Cas asks while Jimmy helps Tessa bring the tray into their room and lay the items out on the table in the corner. Dean tries not to look in their direction, focusing on Cas.

“I can’t. I have a brother.”

Cas nods once, like he understands and Dean slides from the bed, fastening his jeans and doing his best not to blush at the look Tessa throws him while she slips from the room.

“You won’t come to any trouble for this, Dean, don’t worry.”

Dean looks to Cas and shakes his head. “No one here cares what I do.”

Cas gives that single nod again. “For the best.”

Jimmy is already picking through the food and Dean has no idea how to part from them so he says nothing, merely slipping from the room in silence as Tessa had once he’s straightened out and the Twins say nothing to bid him goodbye in return.

**

The blood bay horses remain in the livery for three days while Dean returns to his routine but not once does he see the Twins. He thinks about them, he even looks for them but they're keeping to themselves and as much as Dean half-expects to turn and find Jimmy's welcoming gaze beckoning him closer, they don't come back to him. Dean guesses that it happens a lot. The Twins blowing off steam with whatever catches their eyes. After all, they can have everything. Anyone.

Dean's kind of pissed but he thinks he'd go again if they did come back. He hasn’t got that much pride and he’ll take a few good things while he can, in between all the dust and horseshoe nails.

Three days later, Dean can’t help himself and he strays nearer to the stalls of the Twins horses. He stops by the one closest to the entryway and the horse snorts, eagerly shoves her nose into Dean’s hand in the search for oats. The horses are both well looked after and Dean thinks about his own grey gelding back at the cabin. Pathetic in comparison. Dean misses having a real ride on his dad’s horse but they’d sold it months ago for the money it would fetch.

“Do you ride well?” The clipped and oddly professional voice makes Dean jump and he spins, heels of his boots digging into the dirt floor.

“Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.”

“Um. Hey. I was just-“

Cas raises a hand and Dean stops, wondering what he’s blustering for. He sucked this criminal’s dick a few days ago. Dean clears his throat and he tries again. “I can ride. When I got something better than crowbait.”

Cas steps up and he catches the horse’s halter to turn her head towards him. “Jimmy and I took these two…five years ago now.” He quirks a smile at Dean. “Bought and paid for. We didn’t want to take a chance with them.”

“They got names?” Most don’t seem to bother. Dean never named the old grey but Jimmy and Cas; they seem like the types to indulge in any manner of eccentric behavior.

Cas studies him for a moment, weighing his answer or if he even should. It’s unnerving; the way Dean can see the thoughts ticking over in that gaze. “If you promise never to tell anyone.” Confused, Dean nods. “Mine is Angel.” Cas touches her nose. “She’s carried me from death more times than I could count.”

“And Jimmy’s?”

“He thought it would be amusing to call him Demon.”

Dean snorts and while Demon stretches his neck out, Dean strokes his muzzle. “Can see why you wanna keep that to yourself. And I promise to hold to that if I can ride one of them.”

For a moment, Dean’s sure he’s stepped over the line. That he’s going to get punched or shot with that colt Cas carries in his holster. Then Cas smiles, a patient sort of smile, and gives Dean a considering look. “Alright.”

Twenty minutes later, Dean finds himself in the saddle of the best horse this town has seen. The best horse all of California has seen. And he’s ripping across the desert with Cas hot on his heels, the strap of his hat across his neck as it flies from his head, the wings of his jacket flapping and the dust gritty against his teeth because he can’t stop grinning. Cas falls in next to him and the horses pace each other, used to running together. Dean gives Cas a sidelong glance and the man might not be grinning but Dean imagines that he can see the delight behind his eyes.

They pull the horses up sweating and out of breath; standing with the town and the setting sun as a backdrop and Dean has rarely looked out across the desert and thought of it as anything but barren. This small town, a place for the hopeless and the lost. With Cas beside him and the horse under him, it’s a lot more than that.

Cas nudges his horse into a walk and they head slowly back towards the town. “Jimmy will be worried,” Cas offers to explain.

Dean rests his forearm on the saddle horn and allows the reins to dangle from loose fingers. The horse can watch the path, Dean wants to watch Cas. “You two are close. I mean really close.” Dean thinks about Sam for a moment and the idea turns his stomach.

Cas lets out one of his almost laughs. “Yes. There’s no one else to be close to. And no one else so important.”

“Still, that’s kinda…different. All I have is my brother; we’re not close like that.”

“Jimmy and I have been called different in many ways.”

“You don’t care though.”

Cas glances at Dean instead of the horizon he’d been gazing off to. “No. Jimmy and I are our own.”

Later, Dean falls asleep thinking about that and the wind through his hair and the horse’s great strides beneath him.

**

Dean wakes early, the way he does every day. Where the bird song through his open window is the first thing he hears and the air is always just a little chilly. The world is grey with the early sun and Dean just lies there for a moment, staring up at the ceiling and listening to the birds and to Sam’s soft breathing across the room. It takes him a minute to realize that it wasn’t the birds that woke him. He can hear boots scuffing through the dirt.

He’d heard a gunshot.

He’s on his feet in a heartbeat, dragging on the worn jeans by his bed and his shot gun where it leans against the wall. He steps into his boots and he’s out the door. From here, through the graininess of the morning, he can see the fallen form of his grey gelding. Dean swings his shot gun up.

“What’s going on?” he calls out to the two men who stare down at the unmoving horse. Dean would be well within his rights to shoot them. He cocks the shotgun and that’s when he recognizes them. The sheriff. The banker. Dean’s heart sinks as he thinks about pushing the banker’s daughter against dirty walls.

“Dean. Put that down, son,” Zachariah - the sheriff - tells him, calm smooth threat of violence to his voice.

Dean wavers and does, thinking of Sammy who’s probably awake now and listening at the window. Keeping his head down like he knows to do. “What’s going on?” Dean asks again and his gun twitches up a bit on reflex when the men step closer.

“Thought this’d get your attention. You’re trespassing.”

“Bullshit. I’m paid up for another two weeks.”

“Payments been pushed forward. Now you’d have known, if you’d been at your job yesterday instead of gallivanting around with known criminals.”

Dean clenches his jaw against the sinking sensation in his stomach. “I don’t have the money today and you know that.” They know that because he paid the livery just yesterday and it’ll take a few days before he can scrounge up the money to pay for the land he keeps here on top of it. Longer if business is slow. Yeah, they know and they don’t care.

The banker steps forward, well into Dean’s space and the tobacco sharp breath is foul to Dean’s nose. “You think I wouldn’t find out? You turned my daughter into a whore.”

“Oh she was a whore a long time before I got there.”

Dean’s expecting a fist but he gets worse. “The bank owns this land. You have an hour to get off it.”

“You can’t do this.” It’s all denial and no heat. Dean’s heart is pounding. This is his land. He’s been here since he was a kid and before Sammy was born, before his dad was shot and mom burned up. There are so many damn bad memories here but it’s his and he doesn’t have anywhere else to take Sam. “Please.”

“One hour. You should be thankful we don’t hang you. But that might just happen yet.”

The two men leave, they mount horses and walk them back to town without a glance back or a thought spared towards what Dean is supposed to do now. Dean closes his eyes for a moment and hears when the front door of the cabin creaks open. He looks to the side and finds Sam.

“Pack a bag. Just what you need. We’ll go to the livery.” Dean knows he’s paid up there for another week. It can’t work long haul but for a few hours, till Dean figures out what to do. Where to go. He could scrape together enough for a couple days at the Inn maybe. Maybe, if they didn’t feel like eating for those two days.

Sam packs them a bag and Dean stands where he is for long minutes, looking down at the dead horse not ten feet away. It’s no big loss. Not the horse and not the cabin, with its one room and its kitchen. It had been better once. Paddocks and a big house. Burnt to the ground when Dean’s mom had died. Dad had always insisted someone started that fire and he’d never been quite the same after. But all that’s left of that is blackened support beams and dead grass.

When Dean goes back into the cabin, Sam approaches him and he reaches out to hand Dean a small coin bag. It’s heavy; it clinks with the change in it.

“It’s what I’ve made at the grocery.”

Dean smiles a little. “Thanks, Sammy.”

They head to the livery and Dean stokes up his fire while Sam sits on a bale of straw and watches him. The same bale of straw that Jimmy had sat on earlier in the week and suddenly Dean can’t stop hearing what the sheriff had said. If he had been here instead of out with criminals.

“Watch the fire, Sam. I’ll be right back, gonna grab us some breakfast, maybe see about a room.” The lie is easy. He hasn’t breathed a word about what he’s done with Cas and Jimmy to Sam and he’d rather keep it that way. He’s mentioned running into them in passing, how he thinks they aren’t so bad or so scary. Sammy had laughed at him and insulted him.

Sam nods, frown saying he doesn’t believe Dean for a second but Dean walks out anyway. The blood bay horses are still in their stalls and Dean entertains, for just a moment, the idea of stealing them. They’d fetch a good price. He bypasses them, though, and heads into the Inn, the room he’s memorized and he pounds hard on the door. It takes a moment and Dean imagines the Twins slumbering, tucked together and oblivious to the outside world’s pain. Screw them. Screw them and their easy lives.

Jimmy answers the door. Dean knows because Jimmy’s eyes are so different, clear and deep and light. Dean punches him in one of them before those eyes can widen in surprise and Jimmy reels back with a harsh curse, hand slapping up to cover his face.

“You son of a bitch,” Dean bites out and steps forward. He stops when he hears the distinctive sound of a colt and looks to find Cas on his feet and the barrel of a gun aimed on Dean’s forehead. Cas stares at him for a heartbeat, registers who it is and Dean knows he should be thankful that Cas even bothered to pause before putting a bullet in his head.

“What the fuck,” Jimmy is yelling at him, ready to take a swing himself but Cas steps forward and an arm across Jimmy’s bare chest stops him.

“Dean, what’s going on?” Cas asks in his far more reasonable, grave tone.

“You said whatever I did with you two wouldn’t get me in trouble,” Dean accuses and he flings his arm back, pointing to the general direction of what used to be his land. “They took my house! They shot my horse.”

Cas studies him silently and Dean feels inadequate in his outburst. Across the room, Jimmy is leaning over the dresser and inspecting his eye in the mirror. He’ll have a shiner there by morning and Dean feels perversely proud that he’s able to touch these two in any way. Jimmy casts him a glance, still riled. “What does that have to do with us?”

Dean’s got an explanation all set up but it dries on his tongue under the combined hard looks of the Twins. He thinks he might have forgotten what he was dealing with. These are cold hard thieves and killers. They’d snatch the land away from Dean themselves and not blink twice. They don’t care that someone else took it from him. He deflates and looks down at the dusty cracked floorboards.

“Who did it?” Cas asks.

“The sheriff and the banker.”

Jimmy snorts and Dean glares hotly at him. “For fucking his daughter, huh? What do you want us to do about it?”

Dean has no idea but he has even less of what else to do but go to these two. No one is this town is going to help him. Not the poor orphaned blacksmith who will never be as good as his dad was. Dean’s hopes rise a little when Cas turns his hard stare on his brother and speaks Jimmy’s name once, reproachful.

“God, you’re completely head over heels. You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Sam and I don’t have anywhere else to go,” Dean tries, staring at Cas instead of Jimmy and Cas stares on back.

“Sam is your brother,” Cas says and Dean nods.

“I gotta take care of him.”

Cas nods in return and from the corner of his eye, Dean can see Jimmy throw his hands up in defeat. “We’ll need two more horses then.”

“This is exactly the sort of thing that’s going to get us shot,” Jimmy complains and Cas says, calm as anything; “No it won’t.”

**

They wait through the day. Dean does his job and Sam stays and helps where he can, stoking the fire or bringing Dean more nails. Dean has no idea what the Twins do. They’ve told him to wait and so they wait. He tells Sam, over the dying embers of the fire in the evening, what they’ll do.

“The Twins are going to help us.”

Sam’s eyes widen and he nearly chokes on the tin of soup they’re sharing. “The criminals?”

Dean shrugs. “They’re not so bad. We’re going to leave with them tonight; they’ll get us a couple horses.”

“So Zachariah was right. About you consorting with criminals.”

“They’re not that bad,” Dean insists. “Besides, we don’t have another choice so this is what we’re doing.”

Sam drops it but his unease is obvious through the remainder of the day and all Dean can do is wait. Until night falls and until long after the saloon as quieted and the first grays of morning start coming up in the distance.

Dean and Sam sleep in a vacant stall but the restless noise of the horses keeps Dean starting awake. When a hand too large to be Sam’s rouses him awake, Dean jumps and his dad’s hunting knife is gripped in his hand. He looks up into Jimmy’s smiling face.

“It’s time to move.”

Dean wakes Sam, who looks around them, blurry eyed and when his gaze lands on Jimmy, his eyes widen but he doesn’t say anything. He just tosses his distrustful look Dean’s way and together, they get ready in silence.

Cas is standing down the lane of stalls and easy as anything, he takes two random horses from the boxes while Jimmy fetches tack from the room at the back. Cas focuses his gaze on Sam while Jimmy and Dean saddle the horses, which snort in irritation and stamp their feet. Dean wants to tell Cas not to look at his brother, he doesn’t like that always calculating gaze on Sammy.

“You can ride?”

Sam nods, slow and nervous, and Cas tosses him the reins of one of the horses. Sam catches them and turns to pull the Sorrel out of the livery. Dean hopes the horse is good and not half-wild like some of them. He hopes, that when they get somewhere else, they can take the time to pick out horses that will suite them. For now, he takes the reins of his own and outside the livery, he and Sam mount up. The only gear they have is in the saddle bags behind them and the coin pouch that Dean holds in his jacket. There’s a strap for a shotgun or rifle on the saddle and Dean slides his shotgun in so the butt of it bumps his leg.

It isn’t long before the Twins join them and together, they walk slow out of town and head down the dusty road to San Francisco.

**

By early afternoon, the sun is hot and scorching, and the horses' tails flick at the flies that buzz occasionally through the air. Dean’s hungry and Sam looks miserable and this is nothing like galloping across the desert with Cas the other day. Ahead of them, the Twins look lazy, reins loose and shoulders slouched, horses walking close enough together that Cas and Jimmy's knees catch and hold on each other.

They have water canteens with them but little else and Dean hadn’t thought to ask about food. He’s sure the Twins don’t have any in their saddle bags either. About a mile off the road, there’s an outcropping of rock and the Twins veer off trail towards it, pulling up in the small patch of shade the high sun affords them.

As they rest the horses and drink from the canteens, Jimmy and Cas lean back against the rocks, talking in low voices until Dean approaches and interrupts them. Sammy hangs back by their horses, making a valiant effort to keep the flies from the face of his own.

“What do we do about food?” Dean asks, straight to the point. Cas and Jimmy eye him as one but Dean refuses to back down. Cas gives in first, sighing; something in the move saying he doesn’t want to answer at all.

“We travel light and fast. Anything we need, we hunt for or take along the way.”

“Take. You mean steal.”

“Who did you think you were traveling with?” Cas asks, a spark of irritation and for a second, Dean thinks he might be ashamed. For a second before Cas is looking away, back over the desert and towards the road.

“Look,” Jimmy goes on, “You and your brother just stay out of it. Stay back here, let Cas and I do what we do. San Francisco’s a few days out and then we’ll be out of each other's way.”

Before Dean can respond, Cas is straightening up beside them, a snap of his fingers gaining Jimmy’s attention. Cas nods out towards the road and Jimmy follows his gaze. Dean as well and he quickly picks up on what Cas has spotted, a small wagon pulled by a single mule. Two men sit up front and Dean thinks they’re probably on a supply run to the city. The wagon looks mostly empty but they’ll have a few days rations on it.

“Cas…” Dean starts but he’s quickly interrupted by Jimmy.

“We’re just taking what we need.” He looks over to Sam. “Think about your brother.”

It’s the best way to quiet Dean and he watches as the Twins mount their horses and draw their guns and go to rob the unsuspecting wagon. Sam approaches Dean and they watch the dust trails of the Twin’s horses and the wagon meet.

“Dean, this is bad.”

“We gotta eat. They’re not gonna kill anyone,” Dean says but he can’t take his eyes off the scene a mile away. This is the Twins in action, converging on the wagon and they look incredible. Every move is in synch and flawless. A single shot fired into the air stops the mule and has the two men driving giving the Twins what they ask for.

Jimmy pilfers the back of the wagon while Cas stays in front of it, gun steady on the men. No one gets killed. The wagon goes on its way and the Twins ride back.

“Who wants lunch?” Jimmy asks with a grin and Dean gives one back. He feels a familiar stirring between his legs as he watches them dismount and care for their horses.

“See that, Sammy? They’re not so bad.”

They make a fire and Jimmy cooks them flapjacks and boils them coffee in an old tin. That night, when they camp down in a cluster of trees and rock, and after they’ve brought the horses to a nearby watering hole, Dean shows his own abilities and shoots them a jack rabbit for dinner. Dean guts and skins it and Jimmy cooks it. They share a stick of tobacco and Dean even lets Sam have a bit.

Sammy’s asleep long before Dean even feels tired, wound up from the day. His first day living on his own without responsibilities except for his brother and no one to answer to except for himself. He leans back against his saddle, the sparks from the fire jumping and hitting his boots where he stretches his legs out. Cas is checking the horses and beside him, Jimmy hums a lazy tune and Dean can feel the man staring.

“What?” he says when he finally gets tired of it.

Jimmy shrugs and the light of the flames play over his face. “I’m wondering what you’re doing here.”

Dean snorts and looks back to the fire. “What’s that mean?”

“You’re good with a gun. Not to mention the horse. So I’m wondering why you’re not with the army or something. Instead you’re a blacksmith.”

“Was a blacksmith.”

Jimmy gives him that one with a nod. “And now you’re here, with a couple of criminals.”

“I can’t abandon Sam. My mom died when I was a kid. Dad was shot a year ago. Sam doesn’t have anyone to look after him.” Dean doesn’t want to talk about it, hopes Jimmy doesn’t ask about his mom or dad but Jimmy stays silent as if the conversation is over. Until Dean looks across to him. “Could ask you the same thing.”

“Why do Cas and I do what we do?” Dean nods and for a long while, Jimmy doesn’t say anything. “Because our dad beat me, nearly killed me, when he caught me behind a bar with a guy. He nearly took my head off right there. Thought the devil must have got into me. Till Cas showed up and shot him right between the eyes. We went home but…some people saw, the town knew what we’d done. Dad was a preacher and that’s…not something anyone is willing to let go of. We killed some five people before we managed to get out of there.”

Dean can’t think of a thing to say about that story. It’s not the type of beginning he’d imagined the Twins to have. He’d thought… He doesn’t even know. He’d thought they might have been like him, longing to break away from a dull life and earn adventure instead. Dean can’t think of what to say so he goes with action and he sits up to swing his leg over Jimmy and settle down on his lap. Jimmy’s eyes widen, his pupils sharpen, while Dean pushes his fingers into Jimmy’s thick hair.

“I’m not looking for your pity, Dean,” Jimmy tells him but his hands are sliding along Dean’s thighs to grip at his hips.

“You don’t have it,” Dean lies a little and smirks. “I just like the way you look.” Which is true and Jimmy’s fingers dig into the denim over his hips and drag Dean down to grind them together. Their mouths find each other, hungry and hard, and Dean pushes Jimmy down, boxes Jimmy in with his arms when Dean reaches behind him to grip at the saddle Jimmy’s leaning on. Dean’s been thinking about doing this since the first time and he moans into Jimmy’s open mouth.

A cleared throat has them stopping and for one gut sinking moment, Dean thinks it might be Sam. But they pull apart and look up and Cas is standing over them. He rolls his eyes and his boot kicks Dean’s leg.

“We have to be up early.”

Jimmy laughs softly, the noise muffled while he presses his face against Dean’s neck and his lips catch along the column of Dean’s throat as Dean tips his head back. Dean stares up at Cas with a smile and Jimmy isn’t paying any attention to the warning. His hands have slid from Dean’s thighs and are making easy work of his jeans. Dean takes a shuddering breath when Jimmy’s chilly fingers wrap around his dick and start pumping him.

That’s too much temptation for Cas, who hits his knees next to them. “Are you afraid of your brother finding out?” Cas asks, which seems misplaced until Cas’s eyes dart over to Sam. Sleeping unaware on the opposite side of the fire. At least Dean hopes he’s sleeping unaware.

“Yeah,” he answers truthfully.

“Then keep quiet.” And Cas undoes Jimmy’s pants and wraps his hand around the both of them. Jimmy’s hand falls away to grip at Dean’s leg and within minutes, Cas has the two of them breathless and biting back moans.

Dean’s head still spins from the aftermath of his and Jimmy’s combined orgasms when Cas tugs at him impatiently and Dean goes willingly. Down between Cas’s legs and he sinks down on Cas’s cock with the man’s hands a steady pressure at the back of his head.

In the morning, Sam doesn’t seem any more aware and Dean is thankful that even if Sam does know, he’s pretending not to.

They eat breakfast from the remainder of what Cas and Jimmy stole off the wagon, and with light saddle bags, head off again. The day passes as the first did, hot and slow and Dean has to admit, boring. He lopes his horse forward a little ways, shot gun at his side as he keeps a watchful eye out for another jack rabbit or maybe quail, for something to do more than because he’s hungry yet. When he hears the thump of another horses hoof beats catching up, he looks back to find Cas pulling up by him.

They walk together easily for awhile before Cas says; “Not the glamor you were expecting, is it?” Dean frowns at him. “Lots of kids like you- Men like you,” Cas corrects when Dean glares at him, “Look at us like you do. Full of…longing and adoration. But it isn’t like that. This is what’s going to happen, Dean. Jimmy and I are going to leave you in San Francisco and you’ll forget about this. Because Jimmy and I are going to die young and messy and that’s not a fate for you or your brother. Do you understand?”

Dean doesn’t look at Cas as he goes on, tight feeling in his chest because while none of this is what he was expecting, it’s still better than anything he’s known in a long time. “Then what am I supposed to do?”

“The city holds many opportunities.”

But Dean's been taught that life is just never that easy.

**

They see no other travelers on the second day but Cas and Dean manage to put down a jack rabbit and then a quail. Again, Dean prepares the meat and Jimmy cooks, the rabbit for dinner, the quail for breakfast and another long day starts. They pass another wagon which Cas and Jimmy leave untouched and at Dean's questioning look, Jimmy explains.

“We're close to Folsom. We'll stop and eat there, get the horses some water.”

The horse feels weary under Dean now, plodding along as it should, but the sparse desert grass when they hobble the horses at night isn't enough. Nor are the brief stops at the rare watering holes. A night with a bed instead of the hard ground is something to look forward to.

They stop at the livery to gain stalls for the horses and two rooms at the attached Inn for themselves. They eat separately. Dean is cleaning up from the long days when the door knocks and outside, he finds a barmaid with a tray for their dinner, sent up by Cas and Jimmy. It's a clear sign to keep away for the night and Dean flushes hot when he imagines what the Twins are doing with each other.

He and Sam eat the meal in silence, until they're scraping up the final dredges onto their forks, full and warm and clean. Sam looks at him then and asks Dean what he's been trying not to think of.

“What are we doing?” He sounds frustrated, angry. At the end of his rope and Dean doesn't blame him.

“I honestly don't know.” Dean pushes the empty plate away from him, fork clattering onto the table. He runs his hands up through his hair. “It's like Cas said, we'll go to San Francisco, figure something out.”

“Like what?” Sam lifts an eyebrow.

“We'll figure it out. Big city, sure it could find work for another blacksmith.” Dean's not so sure about that and Sam's expression says the same. Then Sam gets this look and his gaze drifts for a moment to the wall, where Cas and Jimmy are on the other side and Dean imagines he can hear the soft sound of their moans.

“We have a load of money practically sitting in our lap.”

Dean doesn't want to think about it. He damn well knows what Sam is about to suggest. “What do you mean, Sammy?”

“The reward money!” Sam hisses insistently. “We have those two sitting vulnerable right beside us all night. We could go get the law once we get into the city, they'd be able to handle the Twins, they aren't like Zachariah back home. We'd have the money to do whatever we wanted.”

“Shut up, Sam.”

Sam doesn't shut up, he keeps going, words sharp and unwanted in Dean's ears. “They're criminals, Dean. You can bet they don't care about you, whatever you think about them. They'd turn on us without question if it suited them.”

“You're asking me to get them killed. They're helping us.”

“They've killed people.”

Dean sits back, falls silent and for a moment, he thinks about it. Thinks about shooting Cas and Jimmy while they sleep or turning them over in San Francisco. Collecting the reward money. More than enough to buy a decent piece of land, some livestock, a good horse. Set up a really nice barn for his work. Maybe let Sam get an education. All that sounds amazing in his head. But he can't.

“I can't, Sam. They won't turn on us and I'm not gonna give them reason to by turning on them.”

The matter settles for the moment. Dean can still see the ideas lingering in Sam's eyes but Sam doesn't bring it up again. In the morning, Jimmy wakes them for breakfast and they set out again, down the trail to Sacramento.

Dean falls behind, watching his brother and the Twins ride ahead of him. They ride off the beaten path to avoid the increase in other horses and wagons on the trail but occasionally, Dean catches the drift of other voices across the flat desert. Sam's withdrawn through the morning and the Twins keep close to each other.

Dean finds he envies them and their closeness. He thinks back to what Jimmy said had happened to them and knows without question, he'd do the same for Sam. He'd kill anyone for Sam without thought. Almost anyone. It's not the Twins' fault what happened. Hell, that could have happened to him and Sam. After mom died and dad turned hard.

The Twins skirt them around Sacramento and take them past it.

“Had some trouble there not too long ago,” Jimmy tells them with a grin while Cas lopes ahead to check the way is clear. “There's a few people that'd be happy to try and grind us into the dust.”

“Doubt Sacramento's the only place.” Sam snorts, all accusing and suspicious which Jimmy ignores. It doesn't matter to the Twins what anybody else thinks of them and Dean envies that as well. He wants to be like them.

They pass the day like the others on the trail and pull up for the night. They hobble the horses' front legs to let them graze across what they can find and eat from the food the Twins stashed in their saddlebags from the Inn. Cas and Jimmy drift away as the light falls, standing outside the light of the fire and Dean can only hear the murmur of their voices. He checks Sam is asleep and then creeps forward on quiet feet. They stand on the other side of a sparse bush and Dean listens from behind it.

“What are we still doing here, Cas?” Dean doesn't hear an answer but Jimmy goes on. “We could have left those two back in Folsom, what are we doing taking them all the way to the city?”

“It seems like the right thing to do.”

“This is getting ridiculous. This is past dangerous. What are you doing, Cas? What happened to being our own?”

“He reminds me of us. He could have been like us.”

Dean can't stand it, he steps forward, voice a hiss so he doesn't wake Sam before Jimmy can respond. “I want to be like you.”

The Twins don't jump but Dean catches the way Jimmy's hand falls to the pistol holstered at his side. Cas turns to face him, stepping forward but it doesn't do much to block Jimmy's frown.

“No you don't.”

“Why?” Dean's tone insists that that's not true.

“Because we are not good people, Dean. Because you care what others think and your brother would not like it.”

That deflates Dean. Cas's hard matter of fact tone hitting on the one point that Dean can't argue. Sam wouldn't like it and Dean cares what Sam thinks. Cas raises his hand to rest on Dean's cheek and Dean looks up into blue eyes that look like steel but as far Dean's concerned, don't really hide that much. Dean finds himself thinking not for the first time that Cas does give a damn what others think of him or that somewhere he's ashamed of what he's doing. But Cas kisses him and Dean forgets all that. He hears Jimmy mutter from behind him and then the heavy foot falls of his boots as he heads back to the fire. Cas kisses him until Jimmy is gone and then Dean finds himself caught up in bright eyes again.

“I do this for my brother because it is the best I can offer him. Because we are bound to what we do. Not because I take pride in stealing or killing. You can do much better for yours.”

Dean nods and he spends the rest of the night awake while the others sleep around the dwindling flames of the fire. They're a day out from San Francisco. A day until the Twins will leave him and Dean will have to figure out a way to give Sam a better life than Cas has given Jimmy. Something normal.

He hates the way Sam's words replay in his head. The reward money for the Twins would set them up for life. They'd be heroes. They'd have standing. The worst thing is that Dean knows he could do it. The Twins sleep unmoving while Dean lies awake, they're at his mercy. Dean doesn't even think Cas would blame him because Cas knows. The world out here is harsh and you do whatever you gotta do to survive.

Dean thinks that he could bring them in alive but he knows in the end, it wouldn't make a difference. The Twins have a death sentence on their head. It doesn't matter if it's from Dean or the authorities.

Dean forces his mind to stop and eventually he sleeps.

He wakes to Jimmy crouching over him, a smile on Jimmy’s lips that's stopped reaching his eyes. Dean sees jealousy set deep into the blue instead and for a moment, without any sounds from the other two and dawn only just peeking over the horizon, Dean thinks Jimmy might kill him. It makes his breath catch and his gaze slips down to the holster around Jimmy's hips. Jimmy frowns and follows his gaze when Dean stares without saying anything. The smile broadens when he realizes what Dean is looking at.

“I could. And I'd be within my rights. You're stepping on my territory and trust me when I say this isn’t where you wanna be.”

“I was invited,” Dean forces himself to snap back and meet Jimmy's gaze like his heart isn't pounding. But there is no intimidating the Twins and Jimmy laughs before getting to his feet. The toe of his boot kicks lightly at Dean's leg.

“Get up. Cas and I are riding out for a bit, stay here and keep an eye on the camp.”

Dean wants to bite out that Jimmy can't tell him what to do but he stays his tongue and nods his head, sitting up while running his hand over his face and his grainy eyes. “Yeah, sure.”

“We'll be back with breakfast.”

Dean doesn't think about what that means, staying as Jimmy walks away and Dean finally looks around to find Cas a short distance back, mounted up on Angel with the reins of Jimmy's horse dangling loosely from his hand. Jimmy joins him and together they head back to the road. Dean watches them until they disappear from view behind the sparse covered hills. As soon as they're gone, he wakes Sam, tells him to stay and saddles his own horse to follow them from a careful distance back.

Part of it is excitement. The desire to watch them in action again, the way they work together seamlessly. Part of it is the doubt that Sam has put into his head, that he couldn't stop thinking about last night no matter how he tried and the look Jimmy had given him, both last night and this morning.

When he catches sight of them, he rides in behind a rock outcropping, leaving the horse tethered to a fallen tree and crouching low to the ground as he watches the Twins approaching a wagon. He's close enough to see it all clearly though he can't hear what they're saying as they stop the wagon the same way as last time. Dean thinks Cas probably knows exactly where Dean is but the Twins don't have time to worry about him when the driver of the wagon pulls a rifle.

There's a family on the wagon. A man and his wife and their son who's probably the same age as Dean. The man moves fast, as fast as the Twins or more and the first bullet out of the rifle grazes Jimmy's arm but Jimmy is swinging to the ground, using the great blood bay gelding as a shield. Jimmy has his pistol out, steadied on the saddle. Cas already had his out and the moment the first bullet fires, his finger squeezes the trigger and Cas doesn't miss. The man goes down without a noise but Dean can hear the scream of the wife and there’s an angry flare of light as if the wagon were catching on fire.

Dean can't stay crouched at the base of the rocks. He runs around back, grabs his horse and swings into the saddle, galloping before his feet find the stirrups. The fire is out when he calls out for Cas.

“Cas! Cas, wait!”

Cas doesn’t wait. He swings his arm around to the son while the boy scrabbles for his dad's shotgun. The boy stills as he sees Dean and Cas hesitates, glancing towards Dean as Dean's horse stops hard in Cas's path. Dean has his own shotgun out, aimed point blank now into Cas's face but Cas doesn't flinch. He stares at Dean's eyes, hard and emotionless in the face of the woman sobbing and her son trembling as he hovers over his father.

Dean doesn't need to look to know Jimmy's aiming on him. “Get that gun off my brother, Dean.”

“You can't kill them,” Dean insists and doesn't know how he ever thought he wanted to be like these two. He looks between them and sees well enough that Jimmy is a second away from shooting him. Jimmy won't flinch when he does and he won't care. The Twins will leave like nothing happened because this is what they are. “Please, they haven't done anything.” But Dean lowers his gun, even while Jimmy keeps his up.

“You have no idea what you’re dealing with,” is Cas's response. But Cas is still hesitating and Jimmy isn't taking his aim from Dean. Until the son takes what he thinks is his moment and the cocking of the shotgun jumps Cas back into action. The boy is fast, Dean didn’t even see him move. Cas is faster still and Dean can’t stop him from killing the two in the wagon this time.

Jimmy grabs hold of him while Dean is distracted by the shots of Cas’s colt and the light as the bullets spark off something in the wagon. He drags Dean bodily from his horse and throws him down to the ground.

The wind knocked from him, Dean scrabbles in the dirt for a moment before Cas has hold of him, Jimmy an angry silhouette behind him along with the horses from the backdrop of the sun. Cas’s hand fists in the collar of Dean's shirt and the other holds his gun steady to Dean's temple. Cas's legs box Dean in as Cas crouches over him and Dean holds his breath.

“No idea.” Cas growls and he shoves Dean down as he pushes himself up, stepping over Dean to Jimmy. They share a look that Dean watches from his place sprawled in the dirt and then silently go through the wagon for what they need.

They travel back to Sam and the camp in silence and Dean sits with his brother while Jimmy cooks what they took from the wagon. It’s not just the food they stole this time, there’s a few other things as well. Money and a few small valuable items that they won’t let Dean see.

The family had been moving. Now they’re dead because they tried to defend what they had. Dean and Sam could have been exactly where they are if he had tried to defend his home against Zachariah.

He hangs back as they head towards San Francisco, watching the Twins with new eyes. Dean’s always seen the edge of it when he looks at Cas. The hard determination and loyalty and the slight guilt or the lust are all there. But there’s something else. Dean’s pretty sure it’s flat out insanity. It had been there sharp and focused when Cas had pushed him into the dirt.

It’s there in Jimmy as well. In his unending jealousy and Dean still feels the quick fear of the morning when Jimmy had woken him. These two are each other. Cas had said it. And nothing else even thinks of getting in the way of that.

Dean doesn’t want him and Sam to be like them.

He lets his tired horse trail farther behind and Sam falls back with him. From back here, he can tell the Twins are discussing something but he can’t hear what.

“You were right,” Dean tells Sam lowly without looking away from the blood bay horses ahead.

“About what?”

“Them.” He jerks his head towards the Twins. “They aren’t good.” Sam gives him a look like he’s an idiot and Dean’s chest hurts. “I’m gonna make everything better, Sammy. I promise.”

He lopes forward to join the Twins before Sam can ask what the hell he’s talking about.

**

They reach the roads of San Francisco in the early dusk of evening. There are so many people, a general bustle of coming and going and horses and wagons. The Twins take them through to the outskirts where the traffic is less. As they wind along the dusty roads, Cas keeps casting Dean glances until Dean knows he’s been twitchy and nervous and that Cas is starting to catch on that something is going on.

There’s a livery and Inn that’s out of the way from the main shops. Dean knows what he’s going to do. He’s going to do exactly what those Wanted posters say. Dead or Alive. He’s gonna wash his hands of this mess and his stupid childhood ideals. Dean’s not a child anymore and this isn’t a fantasy.

They dismount the horses and Dean follows Cas and Jimmy’s lead into the livery stables, Sam following them all until Dean gestures him back. He turns his head, mouths ‘find a sheriff’ and follows Jimmy’s back into the barn.

It’s smoky and dim with dust inside and Jimmy is right in front of him. Back turned in an ease he shouldn’t have with anyone. Let alone Dean, who reaches to the back of his pants to grab the pistol he’d snuck off the wagon.

“Jimmy,” Dean says, a single calm word when he doesn’t feel calm at all.

Jimmy turns and has enough time to widen his eyes at the sight of the gun barrel, to brush his hand against his holster before Dean’s finger tightens on the trigger. The shot spooks the blood bay gelding, who rears back as Jimmy hits the ground. The horse bolts forward and the other follows in a stampede down the line of stalls. Suddenly Dean’s standing alone in the middle of the livery with Cas’s gun pointed in his face.

Dean can’t bring his own gun back to ready quick enough and his eyes slam closed, bracing himself. But Cas doesn't shoot him and Dean stares back. Cas looks across the length of his arm into Dean’s eyes while his brother lies dead at his feet and Dean thinks for a second that Cas looks relieved. There’s that spark in his eyes that Dean can’t place again, that edge of insanity but still there’s something else.

From outside in the streets, Dean registers Sam’s shrill cry. “Sheriff! The Twins are in there with my brother! He has them!” And he knows they only have a minute.

Cas looks down at Jimmy as he lowers his colt.

“I had to.” Dean tries and has no idea why he does.

“So did I once,” Cas answers and drops his gun as the livery doors are shoved open. He falls to his knees and reaches for his brother, holding Jimmy tight until Cas is jerked to his feet and handcuffed.

Dean gets a pat on the back, a crowd of lawmen that form around him with grins and cheers. “Good job, boy!”

Cas is tried and executed a week later and Dean collects on his reward money.

It’s enough to buy a good horse, a home and land. To put Sam into school so he can be something better and Dean himself joins the army post in San Francisco. He rides messages on a black horse that tears across the desert and leaves smoky dust trails in their wake. He remembers Cas at his side and tries to remain sure of what he’s done. Never can he shake that last look from his head that Cas had given him or the way Cas had walked unresisting towards his fate.

A month after the Twins are gone and Dean’s settled into his new life, a package arrives for him. The Sheriff delivers it, along with a lawyer who reads from a statement.

“From the will and testament of Cas Novak.”

Dean is handed the package and a sealed envelope. He waits until they’re gone to open them. He leaves the package untouched and unfolds the yellow parchment of the paper.

Jimmy told you only part of the truth. I give you this, not so that’ll you’ll use it but so you’ll keep it safe until there’s a time when someone might need it again. I won’t explain because you don’t need to know but this gun is very important and invaluable.

I don’t blame you for what happened. I know how life can press us. How it can show us things we had never imagined. I pray that you will never have to know these things more than you do. So it pains me to give you this but you showed me something and I hope you’ll hold to it. I trust you, Dean, to do whatever is necessary.

Keep this safe.

Dean frowns and reaches to unwrap the package. Cas’s colt lies nestled in the brown paper and Dean traces his fingers along the long barrel and the handle. There’s a pentagram carved into the wood.

Don’t lose it.

Cas.

For a long time, Dean contemplates the gun and the cryptic words on the paper. Before he can begin to doubt his actions, Dean buries it on his land along with its bullets in a wood box and forgets. If, when he's wandering along that back stretch of the field, he hears a whiskey rough laugh and smells tobacco, well, he doesn't think too hard about that either.