Set backs, panic attacks, and learning to deal
This week has been one huge rollercoaster of emotion for me. I was so proud of myself earlier this week for sticking so strictly to the doctor imposed diet. I don't deal well with being told I can't have/do things and I was proud of doing things the right way. Even when I grumped and bitched, I didn't cheat.
Yesterday the wheels came off. I'd set up a kennel stay for Onyx, figured out how to be isolated for 48 hours in my house, or at least mostly isolated, and started contemplating what to buy for meals since I wouldn't really be able to use the kitchen.
Then my doctor's assistant called with enough bad news/changes to completely send me into meltdown mode. First, the radioactive iodine needed to be pushed back a day because the doctor administering it would be out on Monday so I couldn't start shots until Tuesday. And then she told me the dosage had been upped so that I would need to be in isolation for 72 hours, not 48. And that I would have to be low contact for an entire week after being dosed.
This disarranged absolutely everything I had already put in place, and all my hopes for going out and celebrating my freedom on Sunday. They were such nice hopes and plans and I really did break down a little at that moment. 72 hours locked in a room by myself, an entire week of no hugs, no hand holding.. no contact. That is just... not me. I'm a physical person, I crave contact.
Thank goodness for bardicstorm who thought of the apartment above us, which has stood empty for over 2 years now. It's just a tiny attic apartment, but it does have a stove, fridge, bathroom, ect. So now I'll be living upstairs for that week so that we don't have to kennel the cat for a whole week and it will make it easier to maintain the distance between bardicstorm and me. I'm still sad and upset, but at least I won't be stuck in a single room for a week. I'll have some space to walk around.
This weekend is sure to be filled with cleaning adventures as I beat my temporary home into something acceptable to me.
Yesterday the wheels came off. I'd set up a kennel stay for Onyx, figured out how to be isolated for 48 hours in my house, or at least mostly isolated, and started contemplating what to buy for meals since I wouldn't really be able to use the kitchen.
Then my doctor's assistant called with enough bad news/changes to completely send me into meltdown mode. First, the radioactive iodine needed to be pushed back a day because the doctor administering it would be out on Monday so I couldn't start shots until Tuesday. And then she told me the dosage had been upped so that I would need to be in isolation for 72 hours, not 48. And that I would have to be low contact for an entire week after being dosed.
This disarranged absolutely everything I had already put in place, and all my hopes for going out and celebrating my freedom on Sunday. They were such nice hopes and plans and I really did break down a little at that moment. 72 hours locked in a room by myself, an entire week of no hugs, no hand holding.. no contact. That is just... not me. I'm a physical person, I crave contact.
Thank goodness for bardicstorm who thought of the apartment above us, which has stood empty for over 2 years now. It's just a tiny attic apartment, but it does have a stove, fridge, bathroom, ect. So now I'll be living upstairs for that week so that we don't have to kennel the cat for a whole week and it will make it easier to maintain the distance between bardicstorm and me. I'm still sad and upset, but at least I won't be stuck in a single room for a week. I'll have some space to walk around.
This weekend is sure to be filled with cleaning adventures as I beat my temporary home into something acceptable to me.