cant you see the walls you built for me?
so i just got finished with my philosopy paper wich is due tomorrow and i think i might have done well. now i am watching conan obrien who is hilarious. but sit its a re-run, oh well. i have finals next week and then i come home for break and i can not wait. I jusst want to leave this place, i need a break. december makes me so depressed...i guess its jsut the weather. anyway...we sold our house. that means as soon as i get back i have to help move and i wont be living in my current house anymore cuz my parens wanna move before christmas. kind of sad, oh well new house, new set of memories. the transition is always hardest. but this new house is pretty cool. anywayz...lots of studying this weeked. should be a fucking blast! man....i am more than ready for the 3 1/2 weeks off for christmas, so much nothing to do.
sometimes i hate being here...it has caused me some major heartache. but life goes on....i guess. easier said than done. its hard to move on from something when you know it can easily be fixed. i never said id take this lying down.this is ridiculous. sometiems all i can do when i m here to keep from being bored is jsut think and regret and think and hope and wish and dream. and these next few days are gonna be boring. i tend to jsut dig myself a hole and am too deep to get out and i just need someone to toss me a rope or something but im so fucking far away. .....but i u really gotta listen to me, i mean this im ok...trust me....im not ok i have been doing lots of.."creative writing" lately, always. here is a free sample enjoy.
"This is what being alone does to a perfectly good heart."
I'll try to compromise
and I'll try to find out
where it is we went wrong
so just please forget me
and try to make this easy
but i know that with you is where i belong
and if that means chasing you forever, then
whatever makes you happy...
I'll ask myself "How badly do I want this?"
is it really worth the risk?
but please, love, please
why do you do this to me?
limb by limb she'll tear me apart
and find some way to get away with it
and leave me....here to burn and bleed
well I'm burning up my lungs for you tonight
and I'll cough up all that I've been hiding
deep inside my guts, and wash it back down
with a nice strong mix of sympathy and pity
chase it with 3 parts misery
and a shot to the head
and so what is it's easy for you to fake a smile?
I'm sorry I couldn't be worth your while
does it really matter?
does it make it better?
you said,"I'm sorry dear sweet boy, I didn't mean to hurt you."
but you did, and all those empty words you said
mean nothing to me now
and if this is what i have to do to forget you
then so be it i will kill myself from the inside out
I'll ask myself "How badly do I want this?"
is it really worth the risk?
sometimes i hate being here...it has caused me some major heartache. but life goes on....i guess. easier said than done. its hard to move on from something when you know it can easily be fixed. i never said id take this lying down.this is ridiculous. sometiems all i can do when i m here to keep from being bored is jsut think and regret and think and hope and wish and dream. and these next few days are gonna be boring. i tend to jsut dig myself a hole and am too deep to get out and i just need someone to toss me a rope or something but im so fucking far away. .....but i u really gotta listen to me, i mean this im ok...trust me....im not ok i have been doing lots of.."creative writing" lately, always. here is a free sample enjoy.
"This is what being alone does to a perfectly good heart."
I'll try to compromise
and I'll try to find out
where it is we went wrong
so just please forget me
and try to make this easy
but i know that with you is where i belong
and if that means chasing you forever, then
whatever makes you happy...
I'll ask myself "How badly do I want this?"
is it really worth the risk?
but please, love, please
why do you do this to me?
limb by limb she'll tear me apart
and find some way to get away with it
and leave me....here to burn and bleed
well I'm burning up my lungs for you tonight
and I'll cough up all that I've been hiding
deep inside my guts, and wash it back down
with a nice strong mix of sympathy and pity
chase it with 3 parts misery
and a shot to the head
and so what is it's easy for you to fake a smile?
I'm sorry I couldn't be worth your while
does it really matter?
does it make it better?
you said,"I'm sorry dear sweet boy, I didn't mean to hurt you."
but you did, and all those empty words you said
mean nothing to me now
and if this is what i have to do to forget you
then so be it i will kill myself from the inside out
I'll ask myself "How badly do I want this?"
is it really worth the risk?