update
In an effort to convince my students that I'm crazy (and that they should thus fear me), I've recently told them:
1. If you don't return that book, I'll have to take one of your toes. Don't look at me that way. You have ten toes. I only have three books.
2. If the missing book does not show up, I'll be forced to begin killing off students. I'll start with the weak and the slow.
3. If you don't stop talking, I'm going to steal your soul and sell it to gypsies.
The things I get away with are obscene (but not literally, of course). One of our regular subs is Haitian. The kids think she knows Voodoo. I actively encourage this belief, as we are friends. It helps with classroom management. Back to planning.
1. If you don't return that book, I'll have to take one of your toes. Don't look at me that way. You have ten toes. I only have three books.
2. If the missing book does not show up, I'll be forced to begin killing off students. I'll start with the weak and the slow.
3. If you don't stop talking, I'm going to steal your soul and sell it to gypsies.
The things I get away with are obscene (but not literally, of course). One of our regular subs is Haitian. The kids think she knows Voodoo. I actively encourage this belief, as we are friends. It helps with classroom management. Back to planning.