you can't see yourself change - but when you look back, you go WOAH!
"i don't hate my life anymore. at least not today. i guess i consider myself a recovering pessimest... or at least i'm trying. i used to be completely negative and cynical about everyone and everything, but i found that made it difficult to breathe. so now i'm trying to be more of a realist. that way i can be negative when i choose to, but there's still a little room for hope.
leaving a little room for hope never hurt anybody..."
I wrote that exactly one year ago..
kinda amazing when I think about it.
But then on the 29th I broke someone's heart (again)..
I had to look it up - because I can't believe that I really did it..
but that's how it seems alot of my memories are.. like looking through a window where you see something, but you are only watching - like the person I am now is watching the person I was then..
and maybe that's the way it's supposed to be.
merely watching.. and if I thought about it enough then I wouldn't remember it at all.
my mom always told me to forget the bad.
haha.. it only took 365 days.
.. i CAN NOT believe I wore that tie on picture day ..
(yeah, kinda like looking through a window)
--
I'm glad that I am here now.
There is no other place I would rather be.
I love my God.
Tonight he told me "..peace - as far as it concerns to you.."