when the red sox lose, i have bad dreams about it.
it has been a long week during which i have accomplished many important things (created many impressive excel spreadsheets to present as fuck-yous at funder meetings, made while sitting up in bed watching baseball at eleven o'clock at night because i LOSE AT LIFE, jesus christ bought pair of red leather boots on clearance as part of my plan to not dress like a homeless person this winter, helped make wedding invitations from scratch, proving that me and the paper cutter both know who's boss, and it's the paper cutter), but i am most proud of the world's most perfect tuna melt.
make a tuna melt as you do (i like sourdough bread, fresh mozzarella and tuna with a 2:1 radio of mayonnaise to relish) and top it with cucumbers and red onions that have been quick pickled in red wine vinegar. i had these left over from making falafel last weekend, and it is the BEST THING EVER.
dear college-aged girls of the boston metro area,
last time we talked, it was early march, and the topic was "i know the temperature has risen above 40 degrees, but it is still not yet MINISKIRT WEATHER YAY especially even if you're wearing ugg boots." today, the corollary: "i know you have been waiting to toss that pashmina scarf around your neck in a faux-casual fashion ALL SUMMER, but it's only 70 DEGREES OUT JESUS CHRIST." here is a good rule of thumb: if you are wearing a tank top, you probably do not need to be wearing that scarf. winter is six months long! it will be here before you know it! now go put on a miniskirt or something.
xoxo,
throughadoor
yesterday i called to cancel my cable and my technical support operator was very chatty! he made some long, lame joke that i won't explain because it was about my last name, but the punchline was, "well, have you ever heard of magic? you know, the gathering?"
this was not actually the best exchange of customer service i had this week. on tuesday night, i was getting my hair cut, and when i asked the stylist how long it takes her to straighten her hair, she said, "about a half an hour," and i said, "that's not too long," and she said, "well, but for some people, that'd be an eternity." and then she stared off into space for a minute, and then she said, "my last boyfriend told me he'd love me forever, and that lasted four months. so if forever is four months to him, a half an hour could be an enternity to some people." and then she started making random snipping cuts all over my head, and not in a pantomime way, but cutting off actual bits of hair. weirdly, i think this is the best haircut i've ever had.
make a tuna melt as you do (i like sourdough bread, fresh mozzarella and tuna with a 2:1 radio of mayonnaise to relish) and top it with cucumbers and red onions that have been quick pickled in red wine vinegar. i had these left over from making falafel last weekend, and it is the BEST THING EVER.
dear college-aged girls of the boston metro area,
last time we talked, it was early march, and the topic was "i know the temperature has risen above 40 degrees, but it is still not yet MINISKIRT WEATHER YAY especially even if you're wearing ugg boots." today, the corollary: "i know you have been waiting to toss that pashmina scarf around your neck in a faux-casual fashion ALL SUMMER, but it's only 70 DEGREES OUT JESUS CHRIST." here is a good rule of thumb: if you are wearing a tank top, you probably do not need to be wearing that scarf. winter is six months long! it will be here before you know it! now go put on a miniskirt or something.
xoxo,
throughadoor
yesterday i called to cancel my cable and my technical support operator was very chatty! he made some long, lame joke that i won't explain because it was about my last name, but the punchline was, "well, have you ever heard of magic? you know, the gathering?"
this was not actually the best exchange of customer service i had this week. on tuesday night, i was getting my hair cut, and when i asked the stylist how long it takes her to straighten her hair, she said, "about a half an hour," and i said, "that's not too long," and she said, "well, but for some people, that'd be an eternity." and then she stared off into space for a minute, and then she said, "my last boyfriend told me he'd love me forever, and that lasted four months. so if forever is four months to him, a half an hour could be an enternity to some people." and then she started making random snipping cuts all over my head, and not in a pantomime way, but cutting off actual bits of hair. weirdly, i think this is the best haircut i've ever had.