im sober now,
not really.
but in a way, yes.
You have full consciousness of what's happening to you and what is happening around you. You know how to focus, process, and execute.
But why does it feel like it's not worth it. This vicious cycle we call life.
don't worry, you're not thinking about killing yourself, you just want to find the part that's missing with your connection in this world. It's out there, somewhere, I just gotta fucking find it.
* * *
Im kind of talking to this girl right now. I won't disclose the name of this particular woman, but I will say her name sounds way to much like a guys name!
Anywhoo, she's of Haitian/Dominican Republic decent. I've never had the issue with racism, I believe we're all here out of our own accord to the same planet, just handle yours and we'll handle ours, but i don't know how my parents will take it if it gets to that point. My Dad's not a racist in any way, shape or form but he did tell me to try and not date a black woman. He's had bad experiences growing up in East LA with african americans so that's why he's a little weary, but she's different. WAY DIFFERENT.
actually, thinking about it, she's not that different. She is a little but who knows if it'll be a problem. All i know is that we have a good time when we around each other. We got close a couple times and held hands, but never escalated past a kiss on the cheek. She's different. Someone I'm not used to. It was going down the right path when she told me she wasn't looking for a relationship.
Here I thought, that, you know, i found a girl that i wanted to actually maybe be a little serious with.
But she did say that she wasn't opposed to it if it happened, she just didn't want to pursue anything.
I just feel like i want the company of a female. So I have friends who I can call, but when do they turn from being friends to something more? Feel's like they end up getting into the friends zone too fast and it's a lost cause.
You have to re-do your senior project in October.
but hey, at least your graduating this year!
Existence is so weird.
/david
but in a way, yes.
You have full consciousness of what's happening to you and what is happening around you. You know how to focus, process, and execute.
But why does it feel like it's not worth it. This vicious cycle we call life.
don't worry, you're not thinking about killing yourself, you just want to find the part that's missing with your connection in this world. It's out there, somewhere, I just gotta fucking find it.
* * *
Im kind of talking to this girl right now. I won't disclose the name of this particular woman, but I will say her name sounds way to much like a guys name!
Anywhoo, she's of Haitian/Dominican Republic decent. I've never had the issue with racism, I believe we're all here out of our own accord to the same planet, just handle yours and we'll handle ours, but i don't know how my parents will take it if it gets to that point. My Dad's not a racist in any way, shape or form but he did tell me to try and not date a black woman. He's had bad experiences growing up in East LA with african americans so that's why he's a little weary, but she's different. WAY DIFFERENT.
actually, thinking about it, she's not that different. She is a little but who knows if it'll be a problem. All i know is that we have a good time when we around each other. We got close a couple times and held hands, but never escalated past a kiss on the cheek. She's different. Someone I'm not used to. It was going down the right path when she told me she wasn't looking for a relationship.
Here I thought, that, you know, i found a girl that i wanted to actually maybe be a little serious with.
But she did say that she wasn't opposed to it if it happened, she just didn't want to pursue anything.
I just feel like i want the company of a female. So I have friends who I can call, but when do they turn from being friends to something more? Feel's like they end up getting into the friends zone too fast and it's a lost cause.
You have to re-do your senior project in October.
but hey, at least your graduating this year!
Existence is so weird.
/david