Psuedo-Anthropological observations on people's reactions to pregnant ladies
It's been interesting to see how different people react to me as a pregnant person.
Pseudo-Anthropological observations on people's reactions to pregnant ladies:
-I've had three different panhandlers start to ask me for money and then apologize when they realized (in one case one chastised another for asking a pregnant lady).
-I've had people on the street I would be on guard for attack from (I've had people try to grope me as I walk by, jeering, taunting, following...) not only not harrass me but say things like "hey mama, when is your baby due?" "do you know if it's a girl or boy yet?" (the same questions everyone asks).
-some people still whistle. Several people have admitted a pregnancy fetish even.
- despite what everyone says, not a single person has tried to touch my belly without invitation or asking first- not even a friend (though in the case of friends I don't mind). Only one stranger has asked. Maybe I still radiate enough self possession of some sort that strangers don't dare. Who knows?
-several people in close proximity have completely missed the fact that I'm pregnant, including someone I danced with at Gaskells!
-mirth, shock, pride/pleasure or incredulity that I would be dancing at a goth/industrial event.
-goth/industrial folks I don't know being all excited that there are goth/industrial people breeding (though I'm not sure I quite qualify as goth). Ditto for faire folks. I think on some deeply biological level people like to know that their "tribe", those similar to them are producing offspring.
I've noticed that many strangers seem to assume that I am some or all of these: more trustworthy, innocent, sweet, gentle, deserving than I think I am usually perceived- and they make extra allowances. I keep getting the sense that people (even people I would least expect it of) are looking out for the future of humanity. Total strangers get genuinely curious and excited, protective... it's bizarre.
Many people (including myself until I was pregnant) have no concept of why it's hard or taxing being pregnant. The extra weight is nothing- half of my high school backpack (thank you Art History book). It's that your whole damn body is weird and taxed in new ways- I won't list them, but trust me it causes things you would never think of and can make you stupidly exhausted.
Some of those people still do a general "take care of the pregnant lady" thing. Some don't take it into account or treat you any differently at all. I have yet to have a single person on Muni give me a seat so I don't have to stand since the pregnancy was obvious.
It's an interesting combination of stuff. When I am punked out or stompy-gothed out(even just wearing my leather jacket) and not pregnant I get a seriously different set of reactions- fear, distrust, condescension, disgust, assumption that I'm younger or less educated... (these were all heightened in Boston). I had to be over-the-top polite and genteel in my behavior to get the time of day from some people. It's interesting.
Pseudo-Anthropological observations on people's reactions to pregnant ladies:
-I've had three different panhandlers start to ask me for money and then apologize when they realized (in one case one chastised another for asking a pregnant lady).
-I've had people on the street I would be on guard for attack from (I've had people try to grope me as I walk by, jeering, taunting, following...) not only not harrass me but say things like "hey mama, when is your baby due?" "do you know if it's a girl or boy yet?" (the same questions everyone asks).
-some people still whistle. Several people have admitted a pregnancy fetish even.
- despite what everyone says, not a single person has tried to touch my belly without invitation or asking first- not even a friend (though in the case of friends I don't mind). Only one stranger has asked. Maybe I still radiate enough self possession of some sort that strangers don't dare. Who knows?
-several people in close proximity have completely missed the fact that I'm pregnant, including someone I danced with at Gaskells!
-mirth, shock, pride/pleasure or incredulity that I would be dancing at a goth/industrial event.
-goth/industrial folks I don't know being all excited that there are goth/industrial people breeding (though I'm not sure I quite qualify as goth). Ditto for faire folks. I think on some deeply biological level people like to know that their "tribe", those similar to them are producing offspring.
I've noticed that many strangers seem to assume that I am some or all of these: more trustworthy, innocent, sweet, gentle, deserving than I think I am usually perceived- and they make extra allowances. I keep getting the sense that people (even people I would least expect it of) are looking out for the future of humanity. Total strangers get genuinely curious and excited, protective... it's bizarre.
Many people (including myself until I was pregnant) have no concept of why it's hard or taxing being pregnant. The extra weight is nothing- half of my high school backpack (thank you Art History book). It's that your whole damn body is weird and taxed in new ways- I won't list them, but trust me it causes things you would never think of and can make you stupidly exhausted.
Some of those people still do a general "take care of the pregnant lady" thing. Some don't take it into account or treat you any differently at all. I have yet to have a single person on Muni give me a seat so I don't have to stand since the pregnancy was obvious.
It's an interesting combination of stuff. When I am punked out or stompy-gothed out(even just wearing my leather jacket) and not pregnant I get a seriously different set of reactions- fear, distrust, condescension, disgust, assumption that I'm younger or less educated... (these were all heightened in Boston). I had to be over-the-top polite and genteel in my behavior to get the time of day from some people. It's interesting.