Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?, Jack/Liz, "How many women have you slept with?", PGlavenderseaslugNovember 2 2008, 13:35:27 UTC
“How many women have you slept with?” Liz is pretty sure the number is too high to count to with both shoes on, and she’s not even positive that she wants to know the answer. Maybe she just wants to see what she’s up against. As if she hasn’t already seen the supermodels, the politicians, and Bianca. (Sometimes she wonders what will happen if she and Jack ever break-up. Will future girlfriends be intimidated by her? Will she get her own category, like Bianca?)
“I could ask you the same question,” Jack retorts in the tone of voice that’s supposed to let Liz know to drop the subject. Unfortunately for Jack, she rarely pays attention to that. (She can’t be expected to pick up on all of his inferences, it’s just too much to ask. So she mostly just ignores them.)
“Please, don’t.” She’s pretty sure Jack gets turned on when he thinks of her with other women, but that doesn’t mean she wants him thinking of her with other women. (He has made mention of inviting Thomas over for dinner, and Liz doesn’t know if that means Gretchen or a new Thomas. And she’s pretty sure she saw him do the airquotes around dinner the second time he brought it up.)
“Then I ask you to extend me the same courtesy.” He goes back to reading the Wall Street Journal and Liz looks down at the New York Times in her lap. She can’t believe that Jack has both of these papers delivered to his apartment every day. (Someday she’s going to ask him if he’s always gotten both, or if he started ordering the New York Times after she started spending the night.)
“But I want to know. Ballpark figure.” It has to be a low enough number that he doesn’t need to estimate. If he needs to estimate, Liz is pretty sure that she’ll be sick. She’s also pretty sure that Jack probably has a spreadsheet somewhere of all the women he’s been intimate with. (It’s probably titled “Women I’ve Been Intimate With” because only Jack would phrase it that way. She knows Frank has a spreadsheet, but it just says “Chicks I’ve Donked” and he’s put in Elizabeth Hurley and Meg Ryan, so she knows it’s just a fantasy.)
“Definitely less than a ballpark.” Jack’s been watching Friends again, and Liz can’t believe he’s quoting it to her. (She can, however, believe that he identifies with Monica. He once said that the female Gellar would be an excellent addition to the Six Sigma program.)
“Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?” she asks, not even sure which of them is bigger, but pretty sure Jack doesn’t either. Unless it was part of his field research or something. (She wonders if Jack used to watch sports at night with a scotch before she started hanging out there all the time, or if he’s always watched The Simpsons and provided some sort of caffeinated beverage.)
“Neither.” Jack’s tone is getting more dangerous, but Liz is still pretending that she’s unaware of his distaste with the topic. (She’s secretly hoping he’ll say something romantic, but she knows that early mornings when combined with the Wall Street Journal have never yet led to a lovey-dovey moment.)
“I bet Jonathan knows. I’ll ask him.” Liz could also see Jonathan having some sort of spreadsheet about Jack’s lovelife. It could be featured in the scrapbook she knows he’s been working on. (It should creep her out that Jonathan is so invested in her boyfriend, but she figures that he’s at least taking pictures of the two of them together, even if he is scribbling out her head with a Sharpie.)
“You know that would just irritate Jonathan. He hasn’t been too happy with you lately. Did you make another patriotic comment in front of him?” Jack turns the page in the paper, frowning, and Liz knows he’s looking at the business section. (Liz also knows that Jack is unaware of his secretary’s deep and undying love for him. He showed her the collage and said it was good that Jonathan was exploring his artistic side.)
Liz lets the subject drop then. She’ll just ask Frank to hack into Jack’s computer later to see if he does actually have that spreadsheet. (Frank owes her because he was using her Emmy as a target when he played horseshoes.)
Besides, if the number is super big, she’d rather pretend she didn’t know it, and that’d be easier to do if Jack didn’t tell her.
Re: Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?, Jack/Liz, "How many women have you slept with?", PGregalishNovember 2 2008, 15:36:17 UTC
There is so much that I love about this one. First, the fact that Jack and Liz are having the conversation every couple seems to stumble into at some point. Here are some more:
Jack quoting Friends. That actually might be my favorite part. And I totally buy that he identifies with Monica (the line about her being suited for Six Sigma was gold), though I think Jack would actually land somewhere between being a Monica and a Rachel :D
The spreadsheets! Oh, the spreadsheets. And I love how the titles of each one perfectly suit the characters. HAHAHA: "Chicks I've Donked." I also love that you included Elizabeth Hurley on Frank's purely because she'd be on Jack's as well, but he actually slept with her.
Liz wanting to ask Jonathan was awesome too. Jonathan probably would keep track hahaha.
There's so much more. I just loved the entire thing. Great job! I'd love to see you try your hand at more of these, and at some of those "other pairing" ones too! ♥
Re: Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?, Jack/Liz, "How many women have you slept with?", PGlavenderseaslugNovember 2 2008, 17:32:41 UTC
Yeah, I could see Jack falling between Monica and Rachel - they are both pretty career driven. I think the defining Jack-as-a-Monica moment (for me) is when Monica doesn't have a job, but she invests in the stock market. And I could also see Jack making someone drink some fat to prove their devotion. I could also see him doing that whole scene with Phoebe and the pigeon and the lottery tickets. (I spend waaaay too much time with that TV show.)
Other pairings intimidate me, but that's because I identify with Liz so much. This drabble-a-thon is my new favorite thing because it's such a great way to distract myself from homework. Thanks so much for reading, I really, really appreciate it.
Re: Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?, Jack/Liz, "How many women have you slept with?", PGmichellekNovember 3 2008, 03:19:18 UTC
I love this. The voices are great, and I liked the asides (especially the ones mentioning Frank and her pondering if he always watched The Simpsons, which I'm sure he didn't). And this: (Sometimes she wonders what will happen if she and Jack ever break-up. Will future girlfriends be intimidated by her? Will she get her own category, like Bianca?) is great, too. I've pondered that myself and, yeah, she would get her own category.
“I could ask you the same question,” Jack retorts in the tone of voice that’s supposed to let Liz know to drop the subject. Unfortunately for Jack, she rarely pays attention to that. (She can’t be expected to pick up on all of his inferences, it’s just too much to ask. So she mostly just ignores them.)
“Please, don’t.” She’s pretty sure Jack gets turned on when he thinks of her with other women, but that doesn’t mean she wants him thinking of her with other women. (He has made mention of inviting Thomas over for dinner, and Liz doesn’t know if that means Gretchen or a new Thomas. And she’s pretty sure she saw him do the airquotes around dinner the second time he brought it up.)
“Then I ask you to extend me the same courtesy.” He goes back to reading the Wall Street Journal and Liz looks down at the New York Times in her lap. She can’t believe that Jack has both of these papers delivered to his apartment every day. (Someday she’s going to ask him if he’s always gotten both, or if he started ordering the New York Times after she started spending the night.)
“But I want to know. Ballpark figure.” It has to be a low enough number that he doesn’t need to estimate. If he needs to estimate, Liz is pretty sure that she’ll be sick. She’s also pretty sure that Jack probably has a spreadsheet somewhere of all the women he’s been intimate with. (It’s probably titled “Women I’ve Been Intimate With” because only Jack would phrase it that way. She knows Frank has a spreadsheet, but it just says “Chicks I’ve Donked” and he’s put in Elizabeth Hurley and Meg Ryan, so she knows it’s just a fantasy.)
“Definitely less than a ballpark.” Jack’s been watching Friends again, and Liz can’t believe he’s quoting it to her. (She can, however, believe that he identifies with Monica. He once said that the female Gellar would be an excellent addition to the Six Sigma program.)
“Yankee Stadium or Wrigley Field?” she asks, not even sure which of them is bigger, but pretty sure Jack doesn’t either. Unless it was part of his field research or something. (She wonders if Jack used to watch sports at night with a scotch before she started hanging out there all the time, or if he’s always watched The Simpsons and provided some sort of caffeinated beverage.)
“Neither.” Jack’s tone is getting more dangerous, but Liz is still pretending that she’s unaware of his distaste with the topic. (She’s secretly hoping he’ll say something romantic, but she knows that early mornings when combined with the Wall Street Journal have never yet led to a lovey-dovey moment.)
“I bet Jonathan knows. I’ll ask him.” Liz could also see Jonathan having some sort of spreadsheet about Jack’s lovelife. It could be featured in the scrapbook she knows he’s been working on. (It should creep her out that Jonathan is so invested in her boyfriend, but she figures that he’s at least taking pictures of the two of them together, even if he is scribbling out her head with a Sharpie.)
“You know that would just irritate Jonathan. He hasn’t been too happy with you lately. Did you make another patriotic comment in front of him?” Jack turns the page in the paper, frowning, and Liz knows he’s looking at the business section. (Liz also knows that Jack is unaware of his secretary’s deep and undying love for him. He showed her the collage and said it was good that Jonathan was exploring his artistic side.)
Liz lets the subject drop then. She’ll just ask Frank to hack into Jack’s computer later to see if he does actually have that spreadsheet. (Frank owes her because he was using her Emmy as a target when he played horseshoes.)
Besides, if the number is super big, she’d rather pretend she didn’t know it, and that’d be easier to do if Jack didn’t tell her.
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I really loved this line:
Will she get her own category, like Bianca?
Something about that is incredibly insightful. :)
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I feel like if Jack and Liz ever do get together, Liz will get her own category. Bianca's got nothing on Lemon.
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Jack quoting Friends. That actually might be my favorite part. And I totally buy that he identifies with Monica (the line about her being suited for Six Sigma was gold), though I think Jack would actually land somewhere between being a Monica and a Rachel :D
The spreadsheets! Oh, the spreadsheets. And I love how the titles of each one perfectly suit the characters. HAHAHA: "Chicks I've Donked." I also love that you included Elizabeth Hurley on Frank's purely because she'd be on Jack's as well, but he actually slept with her.
Liz wanting to ask Jonathan was awesome too. Jonathan probably would keep track hahaha.
There's so much more. I just loved the entire thing. Great job! I'd love to see you try your hand at more of these, and at some of those "other pairing" ones too! ♥
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Other pairings intimidate me, but that's because I identify with Liz so much. This drabble-a-thon is my new favorite thing because it's such a great way to distract myself from homework. Thanks so much for reading, I really, really appreciate it.
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Thanks so much
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I especially love this bit: “Definitely less than a ballpark.”
Oh Jack.
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Thanks so much for reading.
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And of course. The spreadsheet (aslo of love). :D Classic.
Nice one!
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